eyenjeff
My weight loss woes......
Jul 18, 2008
I have been dieting since high school on and off. More on than off. I would lose alot and keep it off for awhile and then gain it back and then some. I spent most of my life with low to no self esteem and trying to please others so they would like me, becasue they would never like me becasue I am overweight unless I "win" their friendship. I know that is not healthy but at least now I can admit it and can now make some changes in my life.
I have lost some friends along the way and when I look back on the friendships and try to figure out what went wrong, the only thing I can figure out is that friends ( or so called friends) seem to disappear when I am not able to be available all the time or when I gain a significant amt of weight. I feel they are embarrassed to be seen with me. I have a group of friends from high school that are loyal and have stayed with me and I with them in good times and bad. ( kind of like a marriage! LOL!) They have been the most supportive of all for this surgery.
When I first thought about researching WLS, I did not tell anyone except my husband. We researched it together and he came with me for the information session. We were both very impressed with the Kane center and what they have to offer. After my initial evaluation, I decided to have the RNY surgery. I was afraid to tell anyone for fear of what they would think of me. I was afraid that they would think that I was taking the easy way out. I have always been the kind of person who assumes everyone is judging me all the time. ( like people have nothing better to do than judge me, LOL). I told my immediate family members, like my dad, my inlaws, and my brother. Then as I got braver, I told my 2 best friends and my neighbor who I am very close to. As I saw their response to my announcement, I realized that everyone was worried about me and my health and didn't know how to tell me. I felt alot of emotions about that. I felt sad, that they couldn't tell me that they were worried, I felt sad that I caused them worry in the first place. I felt happy that everyone was very supportive and offered their help in any way I need it. I felt relieved that I did not have to keep it a secret anymore. I felt relieved that I could finally talk about how miserable I really am now that I am doing something about it. I always felt I couldn't talk about my feelings on my weight becasue I wasn't ready to do anything about it. I always avoided the subject or made jokes. There was an amount of embarrassment that it had to come to this point at all.
Now that I have told the core group of people, I started telling whoever I thought needed to know ( like the ER when I went for chest pain, or the nurses when I had my gallbladder taken out).
I am not embarrassed anymore, becasue I am doing something about it and am willing to change my entire life around permanently for the better.
I have a 9 1/2 yr old son who is going into 4th grade. I adopted him as a single mom. ( that is a story for another post).
I also have a 23 month old daughter. I met my husband on Sept 16th 2004, got married on Sept 17th, 2005, and had my daughter on Sept 15th, 2006.
* I want to be around for my kids
* I want to be able to play with my kids.
* I want to be able to fit in rides in amusement parks and have the endurance to walk all day.
* I want to be able to sit in a folding chair at
my son's school for an assembly without
worrying that I will break the chair and
embarass me and him.
* I want to be able to play baseball with my son
again, and my daughter when she gets older.
* I want to see them grow up, go to college,
meet someone, be the mother of the bride,
mother of the groom and Grandma!
Well, unfortunately it is very late and I cant finish this post, so i will call this part I and finish part II tomorrow, or should I say later today!
Til then............good night.
I would like to introduce myself
Jul 18, 2008
Hi!
I would like to introduce myself. My name is Eileen and I am 43 yrs old and have been overweight since high school. I decided to have the RNY surgery around Christmas time last yr, and went to my first information session in January with the Kane Center. Dr. Wallace gave the talk and I found him to be very personable and knowlegable. My husband came with me, for support, and he also thought that after the info session this was a good idea.
I made an apt that night for a few days later and they assigned me to Dr. Wallace, so I thought, "great, at least I already have heard his talk". Surgeons are not ususally known for their charming personalities, so he was already ahead on my list. I had my initial consult and was still impressed with the whole process and was referred to a pulmonologist, Diet and Nutrition center, and for some tests.
Alexian Brothers is not normally my "home" hospital, so I was hesitant to go to another hospital for care, but that is where they operate, so that is where I go. Since then, I have actually switched my home hospital to ABMC because of the awesome care I have received there so far. I am now in search of a new primary care who practices out of ABMC. Any suggestions are welcome!
The pulmonologist saw me and did his eval and ended up ordering lots of tests including a sleep study. Who knew I had sleep apnea? Apparently most of us have it and dont know it. So I had the inital sleep study and then found out I failed and had to go back for another study using the cpap machine and that showed I need the cpap. I now wear the nasal pillow cpap every night, and to my surprise, I do not mind it.
He also reccommended an endocrinoligist becasue I have had Diabetes II since 2003, and my A1C's have been climbing as of late. So I found one out of Alex bros and he also ordered tons of tests and started me on Lantus insuling along with my oral meds. We have been adjusting the Lantus and I think now we are at a stable level. I wish I had seen him long ago and he was controlling my DM sooner.
I then had to complete a 3 month medically supervised diet and the Kane center referred me to the Nutrition and disease prevention center where I saw the nutritionist and nurse practioner. I also saw a therapist who I was already seeing, for the psychological part.
Now all the requirements are done and I just received my approval on Wednesday! I have an apt on Mon, 7/21 with Dr. Wallace to get a date for surgery!!!
In the middle of all of this I started having right sided pain under my ribs with chest pressure, and after 2 ER visits, an ambulance ride, a 3 day stay at my former home hospital with complete cardiac work up including Persantine stress test, I called Dr. Wallace and went to see him. By the end of the week I had my gallbladder taken out laproscopically and spent 2 days at ABMC, 6th floor. He told me that usually it goes the other way around, you have the gastric bypass and then the gb surgery. Why should I be normal? The only good thing that came out of that, is to find out what excellent care I recieved from everyone at the hospital and on the 6th floor where I will be after the bypass. The nurses were great and even told me what it will be like after the bypass surgery and eased alot of my fears. ( my less than great experience w/my previous home hosp. is what lead me to fire them and now I am looking for a new primary care out of ABMC).
I was released last Saturday and felt pretty good til Monday, when I started having increase pain on the right side, where my pain was before the surgery. It was to the point where I could not walk, had shortness of breath and felt worse than before the surgery. I saw the nurse practioner on Wed and after speaking with Dr.Wallace she orderd a chest ct to look for blood clots, normal. On Friday, I went to the pulmonologist to see if the shortness of breath was lung related, or due to the pain. He decided it was due to the pain. I called the surgeon again, and he sent me for an abdominal and pelvic ct scan, and when that came back normal, Dr, Guske who was on call, decided to admit me and try to get my pain under control and then I could go home. So I only had to spend one night and went home Sat late afternoon with an increase in my pain meds, a Lidocaine pain patch and an abdominal binder. I can now walk without shortness of breath, and am only in slight discomfort. HURRAY!!!
So the moral of this story is: I need higher doses of meds, and an abdominal binder and possibly the Lidocain patch after the bypass. I think the extra pain was due to a combonation of things, one being overduing it at home, and one being that my bellly is so large that it is pulling down on the internal organs and causing the pain. Plus the surgical nurse told me it was a difficult surgery and that my liver was in the way so it was hard to get the gb out. SHe said she remembers saying, "She is going to be really sore after this one!" The binder was a great thing! Wish I had it last week. But the important thing is we know now, and will have a plan for the "big" surgery.
All I have left is to do the protein shakes and liver shrinking diet beforehand, pack my bag, and go!
I am still very excited for the after surgery period and seeing all of everyone's pictures before and after it gives me so much hope!
I have a 9 1/2 yr old son and a 23 month old daughter and a husband to take care of , and I really want to be here to be ABLE to take care of them.
THis will definitely be a life saving surgery and I am so greatful to have the opportunity to have it done!
I am looking forward to hanging out with you all before and after the surgery and making new friends and helping each other thru the good times and hard times!
Thanks for listening!
Eileen
