And the sexual harassment begins :(

Jul 30, 2015

Now that my outside has changed, I find that I have been getting more attention from men. Most of it has been good, as in clients at work offering complements, but some of it has been uncomfortable. I guess when I was larger, my actions or comments were just part of my personality, but now being nice is now considered flirty.
It is unfortunate to say, but there is a certain amount of sexual harassment that I do have to put up with at work. Some of it is a generational thing like an older client calling me a pet name or something like that. I have had to have coworkers pull me out of situations recently where the clients are getting too touchy and I was unable to redirect them back to their banking. I thought I had a grasp on what to do when it happens, but I was really not prepared to have sexual harassment start in my personal life.

I had an incident with the building manager of my condo last week. I was leaving the parking garage and he stopped me to say that the post office had dropped off a package for me and he would go get it. But rather than calling me by my name, he said in a flirty/slimy voice “hey, pretty face!” He came back to my car with the package and passed it to me through my open window. After I took the package, he reached into my car and started stroking my face saying “you have such a pretty face.” I froze. I have had hours of training on how to deal with sexual harassment, but was so stunned by it happening in my personal life that I just froze.

I spoke with my sister that night about my options and really I didn’t have any for the situation. My strata requires that they have keys to our units, so the man who lives in my building, who is also an owner, and that sexually harassed me, has keys to my home. I contacted the company that manages our strata, but they have never dealt with a sexual harassment problem before. I told them that I had been in contact with the police and the strata asked that I contact them with what the police suggested. The police logged the complaint, but legally, there wasn’t much that he did wrong. I would have a very weak case for assault, but that was it. I am still faced with the man who sexually harassed me having keys to my place. I barely slept those first few nights afterwards and spent as many nights as possible at my friend’s house. I am now thinking of putting an alarm in my condo, but it makes me so sad that making some of my dreams come true (getting healthy, losing weight, buying a home) now has such a negative aspect to it.

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