2 Years Out Today!!!

Jan 22, 2010

It's been 2 years since my surgery.  I have maintained my weight loss.  I weigh anywhere from 153-159 depending on what time of the month I weigh.  As soon as I see my weight creeping up, I focus on what I am eating and get it back down immediately.

I separated from my husband in September.  I would never have had the confidence to do that if it weren't for this surgery.  Not only that, but I don't know that I would have faced my feelings.  I would have kept eating and eating until I got bigger and bigger.  Because I can no longet "eat my feelings", I had to face them.  I highly recommend therapy.  My therapist has been a Godsend.  She made me realize the crap I was putting up with and accepting was not normal!  I wonder what it was about me that allowed myself to get into that place in the beginning.  Now I am learning to say NO and mean it.

Life is good now.  I am happy.  I am dating and learning who I am and what makes me happy.  I am not so much a people pleaser like I used to be.  I think that I always tried to please people because I did not feel that I was good enough.  I was fat, so I had to be extra nice - to the point of being abused and taken advantage of. 

I remember hearing Oprah say - "Its not the food that is making us fat"  I never really understood what that meant until I could no longer abuse food.  She was right - it's not the food.  For me, it was the emotions that I could not face.  Now I am facing my fears and living life to the fullest.  I am no longer "a heavyset woman".   Now I am a happy woman!

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