How did I do it??

Aug 14, 2009

I just want to know how I did it? How did I carry so much weight around and function on a daily basis? My daughter weighs about 53 pounds at  one month shy of being 6 years old.  (totally normal weight for her height and everything)  But the other night I had to carry this sleeping child from the car into the house and I almost didnt make it! I had her over my shoulder an could barely make it up the front porch steps. LOL!  Imagine now, that I carried 2 of my daughter on a daily basis! 106 pounds......how did I do it?  I was miserable, Hot all the time, tired, depressed, my feet ached.  But I survived, I went on and on and lived this way.  I cant imagine how I did it, because I feel so good now.  I NEVER want to feel that way again!! EVER!  I have been stalled for awhile now and just had a discussion with my hubby last night about how I need him to start smacking food out of my hands. LOL.  I am falling back into the same old pattern.  I think...I am going to try to eat this, and if it sits ok then I will.  Even if it doesnt sit well I will still eat it....just to throw it up.  Thats a serious eating disorder.  I am back to logging my food online at Fitday.com.  I am going to start holding myself accountable for what I am eating again.  I  WILL LOSE THIS REMAINING 35 pounds! 

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