gochristy1971
March 26, 2011
Mar 26, 2011
Liquids. I'm not even hungry. I have had water and some broth. I don't want to eat. Just don't feel like it. But, I feel very sad. Like I've lost a friend. Ok, not quite that bad, but I do feel sad. I feel like a huge failure to have gotten to the point of needing surgery for my weight. But, I also know I don't have any more in me. I don't want to wake up 10 years from now, at 50, and say "why didn't I do that when I was 40?"The weather has been awful. Rain. And not just a little. A freakin' lot. I would be outside if it weren't so nasty; maybe I'd feel better if I were able to get out and just take a walk.
Today I was up early. I could hear my downstairs neighbor talking. So, I got up and started cleaning. I did the kitchen. Got rid of my chili I made Thursday. Won't be eating that. My kitchen sparkles! I sorted the crap on my dining room table. My birthday cards and balloon are there...all my surgery paperwork in my binder. My backpack on the table waiting to be packed. I still need to sort laundry, sweep, make my bed, and a few other little things. I'm hoping tomorrow it will be less rainy and I can do laundry without getting soaked.
I guess that's enough for now. For me to look back on, I just want to convey my sadness. I don't even know what else to say. I am leaving behind one life and getting another. I don't know what lies around the corner, but, if what other people say is true, it will be much much better!
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About Me
CA
Location
51.9
BMI
Surgery
03/28/2011
Surgery Date
Jan 24, 2011
Member Since