The journey to WLS & back (or not?)

Jun 25, 2012

My friend on OH - who had WLS herself around the same time I did - lost her young daughter last week. Her daughter had WLS on 5/23/12 & never regained consciousness.

I'm sick about the loss of this vibrant, gorgeous young woman. This got me to thinking about my own thoughts pre-op.

If you're fearful of dying from WLS, I would call the surgeon's office & ask about his/her track record. I mean, you are entitled to have this information.

I started my journey on 9/1/2010 & it took over a year for me to be on the operating table. I didn't really worry too much about "checking out" after my surgery (dying). I was so unhappy at 257 pounds & had been overweight my whole life. I had diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, depression, you name it. My marriage has been a long, tough, rocky road. I was ready for a 180-degree change in my life, no matter what the outcome.

I'm 51 & I figured, well, I've lived a life full of adventures (good & bad), I've traveled all over the USA, & to Europe... I don't want to die, but if I do, I've been blessed with beautiful (now-grown) children & 2 grandchildren. If God wants me, well, I'll just have to be an angel to my loved ones...

I know this probably sounds silly or crazy. But I want to be honest with you. And looking back, I'm glad I had my RNY. It hasn't been easy, but I'd lost & gained weight so many times in my life I knew I couldn't do it by diet & exercise alone anymore.

I'm coming up on 4 months since my surgery. I can walk 4+ miles without being really tired. This is a huge feat for me! I had trouble with the stairs in my home pre-op. I wore a size 20 (tight) before surgery; now I wear a 14 comfortably. I always wanted to have my hair super-short & not think my head looked like the knot on a balloon. I got my hair cut last week just the way I've always wanted it to be! I'm not dying in the heat & humidity of DC (I have no AC in my car) because I'm not carrying around an extra 63 pounds to cool off anymore. I can pull my knees up when I'm laying down & not feel like I'm suffocating because of all the fat rippling up to my throat. I can cut my own toenails. I can shave my legs (& other areas of my bod lol) without being exhausted afterwards. I can actually see what I'm shaving!

This has been a hugely sobering experience for me. I'd never had major surgery before in my life. The anesthesia was unbelievably strong, paralyzing, brain-scrambling. I feel like I was "on the brink..." & that I came back to the living. My scar is not awful. Actually, I love it. I put scar gel on it & I say, "I love you! You're so beautiful! Thank you for my new life!" I have a much more tender & loving feeling about my body than I did before because I know what it can get through. I am so strong!

Much love, GG

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