I'm trying

Feb 23, 2011

I decided to start this blog for no one else but me. I want to record and journal so that I can see where I've been and where I'm going.

May 2010 I graduated with a BA in Justice Studies. It took me 8 long years. During that time life happened, but I continued on my path to graduation. It was hard and I could not understand why I could self disciplined myself to write papers and study for exams, but I couldn't put that self determination into losing weight. At graduation I had decided to channel that energy and focus on me. I did make small changes like walking to work 3 days a week, eating better and drinking more water. Results were minimal.

In the fall of 2010 I tried to take a graduate class, because I was feeling like a failure and school has always given me a ego and selfestem boost. I hated it. What I wanted was to improve my body not my mind. I dropped the class and started to exercise more, eat better and say no to situations that caused me trouble. By Thanksgiving I felt like such a failure. I found my self alone with a 10 lb turkey. I vowed that next thanksgiving I would not be home. Alone maybe, but not home.

By Christmas, I was really feeling like I needed a change. I had been casually looking into WLS, but hadn't taken the next step. I called my Dr. January 2, 2011, I asked for a recommendation. The office gave me what I needed with a warning..."I've had 15 patients go through WLS and only one was successful". WOW...I had no idea someone could fail at WLS. I mean I've seen what Al Roker has gone through, but he is on the food network and has to eat. I have no excuse. I don't have to cook for anyone else but me, I control what goes in my shopping cart and in my mouth. So why is this so hard.

Back to WLS. On January 19th I attended the WLS seminar with Dr. Polh. As I listened I knew that this is the last resort. This is the last diet I ever  attempt. I will not say try...YOU DON'T TRY SURGERY! Since the seminar I've gone through many Dr's appointments in order to get clearence. The hardest thing for me to wrap my mind around is making the commandment to a new way of life before the surgery. I know I need to make the commitment now. This is a huge commitment to me and that is how I have to look at it.

So, I'm keeping a food journal. I'm trying to stick to a post surgery diet. I'm going to the support groups and I'm drinking in all the knowledge I can to be successful. I don't know what the future looks like, but I have the power to change, and change I will.

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About Me
RI
Location
26.6
BMI
VSG
Surgery
07/22/2011
Surgery Date
Feb 23, 2011
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