My story is an interesting one. I will tell you the “short” story.
Currently I am 220lbs and 5’ 3” with a BMI of 40.9. I do have sleep apnea. As a teenager, I never had a weight issue. After a major auto accident and giving birth to my daughter, my “weight life” changed for ever. The yo-yo started and never stopped. About 7 years ago (2003) my cousin had RNY and lost over 250lbs. The first time I saw her after her surgery was her 6 months out. She had come in to my salon for me to help her with her hair. (I was a hairstylist/color artist for over 20 years) She looked wonderful. I knew right then I wanted surgery. I looked into my insurance we had through my husbands work and they did not cover wls. So about 7 months later, I changed to my works insurance…but they did not cover wls either. So I would have to save the 20,000 plus to have the surgery.
As months and months and more months went by I kept saving. I had 18,000 saved by January 2008. (Yes I had check every year to see if the insurance had changed to cover wls but they had not) We had just moved my father in with us after he had a scare with his health. I went to my first seminar. I had found the Doctor I wanted and everything looked like we would be moving forward until April of 2008. My beautiful blue Great Dane found a lump in my left breast. I had triple negative breast cancer. (The worst type to have) In May of 2008 I had both breast removed and in June I started chemo. In August 2008 my husband was diagnosed with colon cancer and had his complete colon removed. Needless to say the money I had saved was no longer and I was too sick and stressed to even worry about it. God knew that I wanted to loose the weight, get a tummy tuck and new boobs, but I don’t remember saying ANYTHING about doing it this way. Unfortunately, with Tipple Neg breast cancer, you don’t lose weight (damn) you Gain weight…Lovely…just what I wanted to hear. So I finished chemo in November of 2008 and started right into radiation. I finished all my treatment in January 2009. (Hubby is doing fine after his surgery and didn’t have to do chemo) So we me not working now I knew there was no way I could ever save the money for my wls ever again. My dreams of losing weight and becoming healthy were over.
Meanwhile, my husband who had never been able to eat due to ulcers in his colon has learned to eat. He had started picking up weight. In May of 2009 after the loss of my father, Doug and I made a commitment to each other to become healthy and to do whatever it takes. The last couple of years were hell. Stress was an everyday, every hour thing. It ruled our life and it had to go. We sold our house and moved into my fathers home to get out from under our monthly house payment. We have paid off 95% of our debit but still just barely making ends meet. We have been on diet after diet, but I still yo-yo.
Finally in June 2010 out of the blue, I called just to check about our insurance coving wls…IT DOES! I had to find my lovely surgeon again since he had moved hospitals and go to another seminar, sent in my paperwork, and I got a call to schedule my first appointment. I didn’t tell my husband what I was doing. I didn’t think it would work out for me for some reason or another again.
I went to my first appointment of August 26th 2010. I meet with the dietician, the psychiatrist, the Nurse practitioner, the hospital insurance person, the insurance billing person for the surgeon, and a bunch of other professionals that day. The appointment started at 7:30am and lasted until 5pm. Yes it was an overload of information but thankfully they sent a notebook of papers home with me for me to read later. At this appointment we found out that my insurance is changing its policy on October 1st 2010. Beginning October 1st, I will have to have the 6 months of supervised diet from my primary doctor. Which since I barely qualify for surgery now would make me Not qualify. So the lovely staff said we had to work fast. They scheduled me for my EGD on September 1st, and my Stress test on September 2nd, and I have to have my oncologist approval so we can process the insurance forms. They will do the surgery before October 1st so the insurance will not be a problem. So I came home so happy and told my husband what was going on…he was pissed.
I had talk to him about wanting this surgery since 2003 and thought he would just jump on board and be as excited as I was. That wasn’t the case. He said I wouldn’t stick with it and I was taking the easy way out. I wasn’t thinking about who would take care of the dogs (our kids) or about his work schedule. He said I was being selfish. He did not want to use his vacation time to just spend it at the hospital again. I had an opportunity of a life time and if he wasn't going to support me on this I was doing it anyway. I just knew that our relationship was not going to make it through. Needless to say I was crushed but we talked and fought about it and I found out that it wasn’t that he was not supportive he was scared to death. Doug knows that wls surgery is dangerous (having his complete colon removed he knows more than most) and painful and he didn’t want me to go through that without I had to. Doug also admitted that he didn’t know if he would like the “new me”. I might attract attention from other men and I wouldn’t want him anymore. We’ve talked this through and I think he’s okay now. He has done research about the wls and talked to our doctors and they all agree that I need the surgery if I’m going to get healthy. (The type of cancer I have is feed by fat and I am at risk of the cancer coming back if I do lose the weight) We’ll see how he does later….
hopefully he is been honest about everything.
I’m still scared that something will go wrong. That they will say we have to do the wls later or they made a mistake and we have to wait. I have had my EGD and my stress test. I just have to meet with my oncologist on Tuesday. I do have an appointment to meet with the surgeon on September 14th to get my final surgery date but I do know it will be before October 1st if at all possible. I can’t believe that this might really happen. I tried to keep this short so if you have any questions that I have not answered, please feel free to contact me.