I started gaining weight when I was six years old. Hypothyroidism runs in my family so my mother knew what the problem was when my gymnastics career came to a halt because I was gaining weight fast at 6 years old. I was on my way to becoming a great gymnastics star at a young age.
I have been on thyroid meds since that day in 1975... I was about 200 pounds at 18 years old and that is when I founded out I had PCO. I really did not care at the time because kids where not in my future. How do things change?
I have struggled with weight my entire life.. Always being the last one to get asked to dance or having a boyfriend. Men seem to think I need them because I am fat and approach me in a sexual manner at all times. I am not deprived of sex. I wish that would stop. It will really soon.
I have lost 30 pounds here and 40 pounds there but finally got a personel trainer in 2001 and lost 65 pounds. I gained it back because I did not like the hanging skin and how I look without clothes. I have over come that image of myself to do the surgey on November 14, 2006. I am ready for the skin and ready for the transformation of life. I want to be free from this FAT prison that I created for myself. I get angry at myself because I have distorted my body with all that fried food and candy over the years. Now I need plastic surgey to give me a normal body. That part sucks.
I am most afraid because I have no image of what I should look like small. I look at my sisters and can only wonder if that is going to be me in June 2007.
I started this process in March 2006 at 287 pounds and lost 43 pounds since my last weigh in at Kasier. I want to be around 145 when it is all done.
Nov 2 , 2206
I am feeling a little blue today. I just want to get on with this process and start a new life. I am serious thinking about leaving after 6 months. I am not telling my husband or family. I want a whole new life. It is a rebirth after all.
I feel great today because i started dressing up more and men are coming out of the wood works. I love all the attention. I have appts today with the surgeon, nurse, and anthesiologist. I am not nervous at all. Just stress because I want Nov 14 to be here NOW..