hawk_at_heart
IT'S BEEN A YEAR
Oct 06, 2008
Hi everyone! Let me start by apologizing for not being on here much. There's alot of STUFF going on right now and I read almost daily but just don't post!
I can't believe it's already been a year since my surgery! I had no idea on that day that within a year I could be where I am now! I didn't make it to goal (9 pounds away) and after convincing my self that there is no "best if used by" date on my sleeve, I'm ok with it! I know I will get there and probably below!
I definately need plastics! I'm not sure when that's gonna happen but it will be in Mexico w/ Dr. Sauceda! Hopefully soon!
I wanted to say thanks to all those before me for your wisdom and thanks to everyone for their support and encouragement!
I have FINALLY posted new pics on my profile! Love, Hawk
I can't believe it's already been a year since my surgery! I had no idea on that day that within a year I could be where I am now! I didn't make it to goal (9 pounds away) and after convincing my self that there is no "best if used by" date on my sleeve, I'm ok with it! I know I will get there and probably below!
I definately need plastics! I'm not sure when that's gonna happen but it will be in Mexico w/ Dr. Sauceda! Hopefully soon!
I wanted to say thanks to all those before me for your wisdom and thanks to everyone for their support and encouragement!
I have FINALLY posted new pics on my profile! Love, Hawk
10 MONTHS
Jul 28, 2008
I am 10 months out now and officially OVERWEIGHT! Having been overweight for the majority of my life, you would think that this wouldn't make me so happy! BUT...I am no longer SMO or MO! LOL! 10 months ago this wasn't even something I thought could ever happen.
I don't want to mislead anyone cuz' it hasn't all fun and games. There are definately bumps and road blocks but I wouldn't have it any other way if it meant I had to go back to where I started!
I was cleaning my desk over the weekend and found a list of things that I had written. It was my top 10 list of reasons why I wanted WLS. I wrote this before I decided to self pay and was waiting out the ins. game. Most of these things have happened for me at least in some small way! I won't write everything (too long) but at least the main goal.
10 - FINANCIAL It complained about the amount of $ I spent on mail order clothes! If I would have had a crystal ball I would have known that I'd be spending just as much (ok...maybe more lol) on new stuff!
9 - I WANT TO PARTICIPATE I was already doing this back in December and it just keeps getting better. I don't sit on the sidelines and watch any more! I am in the game of life now!
8 - TIRED OF BEING TIRED It was exhausting carrying that weight around.
7 - GET EATING UNDER CONTROL I still dabble in bad carbs more than I should but for the most part this was accomplished!
6 - HEALTH I'm definately there!
5 - HAPPINESS This is a tricky one. I will admit that in the beginning I thought that being skinny would solve all my problems. Boy was I wrong!! But I gotta say that I am so much happier than I was back then!
4 - MY FAMILY They loved me then and they love me now but they also love that I'm taking better care of myself!
3 - I WANT TO FIT I DO fit now! Restaurant booths, theater seats, clothes and the most exciting one for me was being able to fit into my seatbelt!
2 - LOSE WEIGHT : )
1 - I WANT TO LIVE Not just exist but actually live! I think that one happened! : )
Still no new pics. I'm working on it though! I will get them up as soon as I can!
VSG ROCKS!!!
I don't want to mislead anyone cuz' it hasn't all fun and games. There are definately bumps and road blocks but I wouldn't have it any other way if it meant I had to go back to where I started!
I was cleaning my desk over the weekend and found a list of things that I had written. It was my top 10 list of reasons why I wanted WLS. I wrote this before I decided to self pay and was waiting out the ins. game. Most of these things have happened for me at least in some small way! I won't write everything (too long) but at least the main goal.
10 - FINANCIAL It complained about the amount of $ I spent on mail order clothes! If I would have had a crystal ball I would have known that I'd be spending just as much (ok...maybe more lol) on new stuff!
9 - I WANT TO PARTICIPATE I was already doing this back in December and it just keeps getting better. I don't sit on the sidelines and watch any more! I am in the game of life now!
8 - TIRED OF BEING TIRED It was exhausting carrying that weight around.
7 - GET EATING UNDER CONTROL I still dabble in bad carbs more than I should but for the most part this was accomplished!
6 - HEALTH I'm definately there!
5 - HAPPINESS This is a tricky one. I will admit that in the beginning I thought that being skinny would solve all my problems. Boy was I wrong!! But I gotta say that I am so much happier than I was back then!
4 - MY FAMILY They loved me then and they love me now but they also love that I'm taking better care of myself!
3 - I WANT TO FIT I DO fit now! Restaurant booths, theater seats, clothes and the most exciting one for me was being able to fit into my seatbelt!
2 - LOSE WEIGHT : )
1 - I WANT TO LIVE Not just exist but actually live! I think that one happened! : )
Still no new pics. I'm working on it though! I will get them up as soon as I can!
VSG ROCKS!!!
9 MONTHS POST OP
Jun 25, 2008
Okay...so I'm a day early! 9 months out tomorrow. I'm down 155 pounds (Mondays are my official weigh day so I have not changed my ticker but for accuracy I weighed today! 
The past couple of months have been hard...I'm not gonna lie! I have been brutally attacked by the carb monster on more than one occasion. It took me back to my pre-op emotional state where I was STUCK in that vicious cycle of eating...feeling bad about what/how much I ate... and then drowning those feelings in more food! It wasn't a fun place to be either time! As I'm sure most of you know! I'm sure I will have more struggles like this but it's good to know that with my tool I can start again.
But now I'm feeling more in control. I'm exercising regularly again, and enjoying it. And the exercise has stepped up my weight loss too! I am sooo close to ONEDERLAND! Even being this close gives me the chills! I NEVER thought it could happen! I was sure (pre-op) I would never again weigh less than 300 pounds! And being under 200 pounds was just a silly dream then! But it's SOOO GONNA HAPPEN!!!
So...if anyone has any doubts about this surgery - I can tell you.... IT WORKS!! It's always good to get help with the emotional stuff too though! I hope to post new pics this weekend!
Thanks again to ALL of you wonderful people! YOU ARE MY SUPPORT NETWORK!! And I couldn't do this without you!!! LOTS-O-LOVE HAWK
The past couple of months have been hard...I'm not gonna lie! I have been brutally attacked by the carb monster on more than one occasion. It took me back to my pre-op emotional state where I was STUCK in that vicious cycle of eating...feeling bad about what/how much I ate... and then drowning those feelings in more food! It wasn't a fun place to be either time! As I'm sure most of you know! I'm sure I will have more struggles like this but it's good to know that with my tool I can start again.
But now I'm feeling more in control. I'm exercising regularly again, and enjoying it. And the exercise has stepped up my weight loss too! I am sooo close to ONEDERLAND! Even being this close gives me the chills! I NEVER thought it could happen! I was sure (pre-op) I would never again weigh less than 300 pounds! And being under 200 pounds was just a silly dream then! But it's SOOO GONNA HAPPEN!!!
So...if anyone has any doubts about this surgery - I can tell you.... IT WORKS!! It's always good to get help with the emotional stuff too though! I hope to post new pics this weekend!
Thanks again to ALL of you wonderful people! YOU ARE MY SUPPORT NETWORK!! And I couldn't do this without you!!! LOTS-O-LOVE HAWK
8 MONTHS POST OP
May 26, 2008
I am 8 months post op today! My weight was 221 so I have lost 10 pounds in the last month! BUT...I am really struggling with old demons these days!
Although I am still losing weight I am not working my tool to my advantage! I NEED to get in the right mind set! Carbs are evil and I need to remember that they are NOT NOT NOT my friends!!!
I also need to get my a$$ in gear with exercise! I haven't done much at all since I got back from vacation. I'm tired of telling myself that "Monday will be different!" It's what I did pre-op and that got me no where but bigger!!! SIGH....
I hope to have better things to report at 9 months!!!
7 MONTH CHECK IN
Apr 26, 2008
I'm 7 months out today! Haven't had a lot of changes since last month. My weight this morning was 231. My weight loss has been slow especially the last couple of weeks. I would like to blame that on the amount of food and never ending supply of ice cream available on the cruise ship but that would be avoiding accountability and no one forced me to eat! I also have not exercized much. I just got busy and I hate to admit...LAZY then did no aerobic activity (although alot of walking) on vacation. BUT...the beauty of my sleeve is that I can get right back on track! And that is what I did. I did a few days of liquids after I got home and I have exercized the last 3 days and intend to keep it up! I am hoping to make it to goal by my 1 year mark but if it doesn't happen that will be ok!!! I STILL LOVE MY VSG AND ALL MY AMAZING OH FRIENDS!!!
6 AMAZING MONTHS
Mar 26, 2008
TODAY IS MY 6 MONTH SURGIVERSARY!!!
* I'm still losing hair - have been since right at 3 months but it doesnt bother me except the cleaning up of it!
*I've gone from a size 30/32 in pants to and 18! (some 16s)
*Also a size 30/32 in shirts to 18/20
*In bra sizes I've gone from a very tight 46DDD to a 40DD
and doing adjustments on that! The ~girls~ have headed further south than than a midwest migratory bird! 
Thank Goodness for plastics!!
*My shoe size has gone from a 10 or 11 (depending on brand) to a 9 or 9.5!
*And last but not least I am down 126 pounds!
(as of Monday) (Ok... that's my favorite part!)
I never imagined 6 months ago that life could be this good! There are certainly some bumps in the raod
but I deal with them the best way I know how (not by drowning my problems w/ food 
any more though!)!
I am so thankful for Dr. Alvarez,
Susan, 
and my wonderful, amazingly supportive OH friends!!!
Jodie
* I'm still losing hair - have been since right at 3 months but it doesnt bother me except the cleaning up of it!
*I've gone from a size 30/32 in pants to and 18! (some 16s)
*Also a size 30/32 in shirts to 18/20
*In bra sizes I've gone from a very tight 46DDD to a 40DD
and doing adjustments on that! The ~girls~ have headed further south than than a midwest migratory bird! Thank Goodness for plastics!! *My shoe size has gone from a 10 or 11 (depending on brand) to a 9 or 9.5!
*And last but not least I am down 126 pounds!
(as of Monday) (Ok... that's my favorite part!)I never imagined 6 months ago that life could be this good! There are certainly some bumps in the raod
but I deal with them the best way I know how (not by drowning my problems w/ food any more though!)!I am so thankful for Dr. Alvarez,
Susan, and my wonderful, amazingly supportive OH friends!!! Jodie
ITS BEEN FIVE MONTHS ALREADY
Feb 29, 2008
I can't believe that I have had my sleeve for five months already! The last month especially has flown by! I'm down 114 pounds and ALOT of inches! I didn't take measurments pre-op and really wish I would have!
I can't stress enough to the PRE-OPS AND NEWBIES how important it is to exercise. Even though I just started back at the gym, I have been diligent about walking! I do it at least 5 days a week! It was hard at first. I still had that 100 + pounds along with the pain but I knew it would help! (Plus I kept getting passed by the senior citizens that walk there! LOL!!) Now I power walk for at least 3 miles!
There have been so many incredible things that have happened in the last five months! Not only have I had many wonderful NSVs, but my confidence has soared. I think the best thing of all - that I just recently noticed - is that I feel feminine again! That may sound odd to some of you but at the size I was I didn't have alot of choices for clothing. Most of the time I wore big men's t-shirts and sweat pants! I love wearing color now! Not just gray, black and blue! And I feel like I deserve to wear pretty clothes! I know alot of this stuff was just mental issues w/ me but this surgery has meant FREEDOM to me on so many levels!
So...thanks again to all you awesome people for your support and advice! Without some of the veterans I don't think I would have been as successful as I have been so far! I LOVE MY SLEEVE AND I CAN'T SAY IT ENOUGH!!!
I can't stress enough to the PRE-OPS AND NEWBIES how important it is to exercise. Even though I just started back at the gym, I have been diligent about walking! I do it at least 5 days a week! It was hard at first. I still had that 100 + pounds along with the pain but I knew it would help! (Plus I kept getting passed by the senior citizens that walk there! LOL!!) Now I power walk for at least 3 miles!
There have been so many incredible things that have happened in the last five months! Not only have I had many wonderful NSVs, but my confidence has soared. I think the best thing of all - that I just recently noticed - is that I feel feminine again! That may sound odd to some of you but at the size I was I didn't have alot of choices for clothing. Most of the time I wore big men's t-shirts and sweat pants! I love wearing color now! Not just gray, black and blue! And I feel like I deserve to wear pretty clothes! I know alot of this stuff was just mental issues w/ me but this surgery has meant FREEDOM to me on so many levels!
So...thanks again to all you awesome people for your support and advice! Without some of the veterans I don't think I would have been as successful as I have been so far! I LOVE MY SLEEVE AND I CAN'T SAY IT ENOUGH!!!
FOUR MONTH CHECK IN
Feb 03, 2008
I HAVE LOST 100 POUNDS SINCE MY VSG JOURNEY BEGAN!!!!! That includes the 25 lost on the 2 weeks of pre-op liquids!
I've gone from a 30/32 shirt and a 26/28 pants to a 20 or 22 in both! I've dropped a few bra sizes too! AND I've also gone from being super morbidly obese to just OBESE!!!
I have had many great things happen it such a short time!
I now fit in my seatbelt, theater seats, and restaurant booths!
I can sit with my legs crossed!
I can move with ease, and
I'm feeling more confident everyday!
I LOVE MY VSG!!!!!....and all of you wonderful, supportive people who helped me get here!!!
I've gone from a 30/32 shirt and a 26/28 pants to a 20 or 22 in both! I've dropped a few bra sizes too! AND I've also gone from being super morbidly obese to just OBESE!!!
I have had many great things happen it such a short time!
I now fit in my seatbelt, theater seats, and restaurant booths!
I can sit with my legs crossed!
I can move with ease, and
I'm feeling more confident everyday!
I LOVE MY VSG!!!!!....and all of you wonderful, supportive people who helped me get here!!!
My nightmare (train ride) to VSG
Dec 07, 2007
From my story you know that I took the train to San Antonio because I was too chicken to fly. NEVER AGAIN!!!!! I wasnt aware that I could just purchase my train tickets at the train station so I contacted a travel agent. I purchased two tickets for what was an economy car. The agent told me that in that car there were two recliners, two beds, and a big window for viewing the scenery! I think the total for the tickets was about $754. As my departure date approached I waited for my tickets. They never did show up. We all know how scary it is before surgery, and this only made it worse for me. I took it as a sign that I shouldn't be doing this! I called the travel agent and he assured me that everything would be taken care of once I got to the train station. All I had to do was take the missing ticket info that he sent me(at least it showed up!) and present it to the ticket agent and all would be fixed. What he failed to mention was that I would have to purchase two new tickets and wait for the other tickets to be refunded from my card. [not only did I put the surgery (d*mn insurance) on my credit card, I also put the first set of tickets on there too.]
So there I was 2 days and a 30 hour train ride from my surgery w/ no tickets. The ticket agent contacted my travel agent who said he had told me about all of this (LIAR!!!) The two of them suggested I contact the credit card company to see if they could raise my credit limit (my limit was $200 short of what I needed) I was denied! Did I mention I'm crying by this time? Crying like a big ol' baby in front of a room full of people I was supposed to be boarding a shuttle to the next destination with. That didn't happen. The shuttle left w/out me and my Mom. I finally talked to the travel agent myself . I said to him "You told me everything would be taken care of when I got here!" (Here was a train station 1.5 hours from my house!) By the way I forgot to mention that when I ordered the tickets the woman I spoke with suggested that I come pick them up rather than having them mailed. She said that since they were paper tickets there was a greater chance of them getting lost. I agreed and went to pick them up the next morning only to find out that the owner of the agency had just dropped them in the mail!!
The two agents suggested I call a relative and see if they could charge new tickets! WTH!!! While the two agents were on the phone w/ Amtrak I went outside and called Susan (Dr. Alvarez' patient coordinator). I had a total melt down and was crying uncontrolably. Susan offered to put the train tickets on the company credit card and I could just pay them back! (That just goes to show you how awesome she and Dr. A are!!) I didn't feel "right" doing that so I told her I would get back to her.
I went back into the train station and after much more crying on the phone w/ my travel agent (I ended up telling him why I was going and could NOT miss my date) he decided to put the tickets on his business credit card. I know it was a nice thing to do but if he hadn't stuck the tickets in the mail - none of this would have happened.
I called Susan back (still sobbing) to let her know I was going to be there.
The shuttle trip was an hour and a half to the next train station. When I boarded the train I was shocked. (Now I look back and know that I shouldn't have been!) The two recliners converted into one bed and the other was a pull down bunk bed. OMG!! We all know I was overweight - thats why I embarked on this journey - but so is my Mom and honestly there was no way my big ol' butt was climbing up to that bunk. So I had to help her. And by the way, that big window for viewing the country side....everything looked the same at 60 miles an hour!! I was SOOOOO Scammed!
We were 2.5 hours late arriving in San Antonio. Amtrak trains are required to stop and let freight trains pass/pull ahead. Who knew?
I got 3.5 hours of sleep the night before my surgery. The entire trip all I could think was "It's a sign. I shouldnt be doing this"
The hotel, Rosie and the trip to Mexico, Dr. Alvarez, the surgery, and the trip back to the hotel were all GREAT! But I still had to go home!....YIKES!
We got to the San Antonio train station at about 6:15 am. The train was leaving at 7! I knew that being post op the economy car just wouldn't cut it. (My mom and I practically had to sit knee to knee. I have very long legs and I knew I was going to have to be able to rest and I couldn't make my mom stand!!) So I upgraded! Another $200!! Now we had a family suite. Definately more room- and our own restroom that doubled as a shower (like that was gonna happen LOL!) but not any more comfortable!! Thank God and Dr. Alvarez for the sublingual pain meds!!!
The ride home had just as many -if not more- delays. We pulled into St. Louis two hours behind schedule. After leaving St. Louis the train personel came by and told us that we were not going to get to Springfield IL in time to catch our shuttle. So Amtrak was going put all passengers headed to Springfield in a hotel in Chicago for the night! I was so homesick, I missed my family and I really missed my dog, so of course I started crying....again. Our car attendant felt really bad and apologized several times but it didn't make me feel any better. He knew I had had surgery (not what kind tho) and had been taking very good care of us. Aparently he discussed the situation w/ a co-worker who took a look at our tickets, made some calls and found out that there was another option for us! Thank GOD!!!
Since we had my Mom's van parked at the train station in Galesburg, IL (the car attendant thought we were taking the train to my home town in Iowa) we could get off the train in Normal Illinois and catch a Greyhound bus to Galesburg! A 2 hour bus ride!!! What they failed to mention was there would be a two hour wait in Normal before we could catch the bus! I was supposed to be home in Iowa about 4 pm on the Sunday after my surgery (according tothe itinerary given to me by my ever-so-trustworthy-travel agent!) I got home @ 9:45! I was so exhausted that I broke down as soon as I walked into my brother's house! (Who me...cry?!!) Next time I travel it will be by way of xanax and airplane!!!
So there I was 2 days and a 30 hour train ride from my surgery w/ no tickets. The ticket agent contacted my travel agent who said he had told me about all of this (LIAR!!!) The two of them suggested I contact the credit card company to see if they could raise my credit limit (my limit was $200 short of what I needed) I was denied! Did I mention I'm crying by this time? Crying like a big ol' baby in front of a room full of people I was supposed to be boarding a shuttle to the next destination with. That didn't happen. The shuttle left w/out me and my Mom. I finally talked to the travel agent myself . I said to him "You told me everything would be taken care of when I got here!" (Here was a train station 1.5 hours from my house!) By the way I forgot to mention that when I ordered the tickets the woman I spoke with suggested that I come pick them up rather than having them mailed. She said that since they were paper tickets there was a greater chance of them getting lost. I agreed and went to pick them up the next morning only to find out that the owner of the agency had just dropped them in the mail!!
The two agents suggested I call a relative and see if they could charge new tickets! WTH!!! While the two agents were on the phone w/ Amtrak I went outside and called Susan (Dr. Alvarez' patient coordinator). I had a total melt down and was crying uncontrolably. Susan offered to put the train tickets on the company credit card and I could just pay them back! (That just goes to show you how awesome she and Dr. A are!!) I didn't feel "right" doing that so I told her I would get back to her.
I went back into the train station and after much more crying on the phone w/ my travel agent (I ended up telling him why I was going and could NOT miss my date) he decided to put the tickets on his business credit card. I know it was a nice thing to do but if he hadn't stuck the tickets in the mail - none of this would have happened.
I called Susan back (still sobbing) to let her know I was going to be there.
The shuttle trip was an hour and a half to the next train station. When I boarded the train I was shocked. (Now I look back and know that I shouldn't have been!) The two recliners converted into one bed and the other was a pull down bunk bed. OMG!! We all know I was overweight - thats why I embarked on this journey - but so is my Mom and honestly there was no way my big ol' butt was climbing up to that bunk. So I had to help her. And by the way, that big window for viewing the country side....everything looked the same at 60 miles an hour!! I was SOOOOO Scammed!
We were 2.5 hours late arriving in San Antonio. Amtrak trains are required to stop and let freight trains pass/pull ahead. Who knew?
I got 3.5 hours of sleep the night before my surgery. The entire trip all I could think was "It's a sign. I shouldnt be doing this"
The hotel, Rosie and the trip to Mexico, Dr. Alvarez, the surgery, and the trip back to the hotel were all GREAT! But I still had to go home!....YIKES!
We got to the San Antonio train station at about 6:15 am. The train was leaving at 7! I knew that being post op the economy car just wouldn't cut it. (My mom and I practically had to sit knee to knee. I have very long legs and I knew I was going to have to be able to rest and I couldn't make my mom stand!!) So I upgraded! Another $200!! Now we had a family suite. Definately more room- and our own restroom that doubled as a shower (like that was gonna happen LOL!) but not any more comfortable!! Thank God and Dr. Alvarez for the sublingual pain meds!!!
The ride home had just as many -if not more- delays. We pulled into St. Louis two hours behind schedule. After leaving St. Louis the train personel came by and told us that we were not going to get to Springfield IL in time to catch our shuttle. So Amtrak was going put all passengers headed to Springfield in a hotel in Chicago for the night! I was so homesick, I missed my family and I really missed my dog, so of course I started crying....again. Our car attendant felt really bad and apologized several times but it didn't make me feel any better. He knew I had had surgery (not what kind tho) and had been taking very good care of us. Aparently he discussed the situation w/ a co-worker who took a look at our tickets, made some calls and found out that there was another option for us! Thank GOD!!!
Since we had my Mom's van parked at the train station in Galesburg, IL (the car attendant thought we were taking the train to my home town in Iowa) we could get off the train in Normal Illinois and catch a Greyhound bus to Galesburg! A 2 hour bus ride!!! What they failed to mention was there would be a two hour wait in Normal before we could catch the bus! I was supposed to be home in Iowa about 4 pm on the Sunday after my surgery (according tothe itinerary given to me by my ever-so-trustworthy-travel agent!) I got home @ 9:45! I was so exhausted that I broke down as soon as I walked into my brother's house! (Who me...cry?!!) Next time I travel it will be by way of xanax and airplane!!!
About Me
Winchestertonfieldville, IA
Location
33.8
BMI
Surgery
09/26/2007
Surgery Date
Surgeon
Sep 11, 2007
Member Since
