Two Years Ago.....

Oct 13, 2008

Two Years Ago...

- I could fit hardly anywhere. Today I can fit anywhere.


- I wore a size 28 pants and a 3XL top.
Today I fit into clothes that are a size 8/10 pants and a medium shirt!

- I couldn’t leave my house without worrying about how I looked, . Today I walk with my head held high and rarely worry about any of those old issues.


- I couldn’t put my shoes and socks on with out sitting down on the bed or couch and half killing myself trying to reach. Today I can put them on standing on one foot AND still breathe.


- I could only wear and buy stretch pants as they were all that I was comfortable in. Today I will NEVER buy another pair of stretch pants again.



- Couldn’t live with high temperatures! Today, I am freezing most of the time!

- Had a shadow that could shade a small country.
Today I look at my shadow and still have to ask “Is that really me?”

- Was self conscious instead of self confident. Today I am a little bit self confident instead of self conscious.


- Was always tired and felt blah. Today I get up early and feel great!! I have so much energy.


-Had to pay high prices for clothing. Plus size clothes are not cheap.
Today I buy off the rack and at Goodwill!


- Would not have caught me in family photos.
Today you can’t keep me out of the picture!

- Hated looking in the mirror and rarely saw a full length view as I just didn’t want to know.
   Today I love looking in the mirror!

- That I used to over flow in most chairs no matter how large they were. Today I feel small in most chairs.


- Used to need food to satisfy my mind that I wasn't starving. Today am finding it hard to want to even eat at all and find most times when we eat out its an eye opener to how much food they serve.


- I used to wear shirts that went to my knees as I was sure it was “hiding it all”. Today I find that I am looking for shirts that are shorter and don’t go over my butt.


- Raven couldn’t sit on my lap as there was no lap to sit on – she kind of sat on my stomach.
Today she sits on my lap and I have room to spare, I have a lap!

-Would have never stepped foot at the swimming pool in a bathing suit.
I went to the Oil City Swimming Pool several times this summer!

-I would have never considered elective surgery of any type….
Today, I am grateful I had the courage to make one of the biggest decisions of my life! I am down from 285 pounds to 154!

One year ago....

Oct 12, 2007


Wow. Has it been a year already?  This time (11:00 PM EST) almost a year ago I was trying to lay down for a couple of hours of sleep before my surgery.  I was so nervous!!  I woke at 4:00 a.m. We had to be at the hospital at 5:30 a.m. and my surgery was scheduled for 7:30 a.m.  


On that day I was 37 years old, 5' 3" tall, 251lb - uncomfortably in size 24/26, BMI of 48, married, mother to 2, and grandmother to Princess Raven.

My husband, Bill, of 20 years adored me - he just wanted me "alive"...

My son, Daniel, loved me and was already grieving knowing he would not be hugging his "fluffy" mom for much longer...he felt I was perfect just the way I was.
My daughter, Rachel, loved me and supported me, but only knew an obese mom all her 16 years- and she was so afraid something bad was going to happen to me during surgery.

 My parents wanted to support me but they were a nervous wreck. My mom’s sister had her stomach stapled years ago and to this day, still has problems! My mom was convinced that my life was going to be the same as her sister’s!

 My friends & family (the few that knew about the surgery) and Dr. Andres, my family MD, were so supportive and as excited about the surgery as I was.

 I chose the surgery because I truly believed it was my last, best shot at living an active life. I chose the surgery because I HOPED and PRAYED my outside would, for the first time, in many years, would begin to reflect the "me” that had been so longing to show up - but had been so well hidden within for so long.  I promised myself that I would follow aftercare protocol. I did not get my guts cut opened and rearranged to fail. Nope - failure was not an option - not this time.   I had years of self-medicating with food. Years of dieting and failing and beating myself up in that vicious cycle of self-inflicted pain - eat more, guilt, driven to eat more, guilt, etc.

 I haven’t quite reached my goal weight, and I am so close, and I am working hard to achieve that goal!  My BMI is almost “normal”… This 39 year old woman can walk 5 miles and talk at the same time…can walk up and down stairs and talk at the same time….I don’t know if my husband enjoys walking the stairs at Magee Women’s Hospital, but I know I sure do! I can chase after my  2 ½ year old granddaughter with no problem! Instead of finding a “close” parking spot at Wal-Mart, I park far away because I know I can walk the distance! I can do more now than ever! This past weekend, I walked 5 miles in the woods with my husband helping him carry wood to his tree stand for hunting season!  Last year, I wouldn’t have been able to do that!!  I had a short sleeved shirt on and my husband felt I should wear a long sleeved shirt to keep my arms from getting cut up from the jagger bushes in the woods, so he handed me one of my son’s long sleeved shirts and it fit!!!!  

 God is A-W-E-S-O-M-E!

 My family is F-A-N-T-A-S-T-I-C!

 Life is W-O-N-D-E-R-F-U-L!

 

 

 Holly

 

 


I'm a Century Club Member!!

Apr 26, 2007


Pictures...

Jan 06, 2007

I finally got some pictures posted on here!  YEAH!!!

About Me
Oil City, PA
Location
26.6
BMI
RNY
Surgery
10/10/2006
Surgery Date
Jan 03, 2007
Member Since

Friends 30

Latest Blog 4
Two Years Ago.....
One year ago....
I'm a Century Club Member!!
Pictures...

×