Joseph Itkor

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Well ... here we are!  In two days, it will be exactly one year since my surgery.  Today, for the first time in more than 17 yrs, I actually weigh LESS than 200 lbs!   I am no about 138 lbs less than I was a year ago.  The weight loss has slowed DRASTICALLY.  In the past 6 months, I've only lost 11 lbs.  That's not very much considering the FIRST 6 months, I lost 127 lbs.  Of course, its SUPPOSED to just fall off in the beginning, but I wasn't really doing the things I needed to do to keep the weight loss going, so from Christmas until just last week, that scale didn't BUDGE. 

We all go into this thing thinking "I'm not going to be one of those people who regain the weight.  I'm going to do this the right way," etc.  But then many of us realize the reason we got fat to begin with is that we're not good rule followers and we love to eat stuff we shouldn't.  It starts with a little taste here and there, then expands to eating burger king, M&Ms and cookies.  I really don't understand how I got back to eating that poorly, but I totally did.

So, in an effort to "get back to basics,"  I jumped on the 5dpt bandwagon.  Thanks go to Darcy Burke and Kaye Bailey.  If you haven't done this yet ... DO IT.  What an amazing tool it turned out to be.  In just one short week, I'm back to eating well.  Only the right kinds of food and decent amounts.  Plus, the scale FINALLY moved, and I dropped below 200 for the first time in more than 17 yrs.  (did I mention that already?  LoL)

So, there ya have it.  The first year of my new life has passed and all I can say is .... so far, so good.

Today is exactly five months since I had my Lap RNY.  I am offically down 112 lbs.  Only 45 more to go in order to reach my goal.

I'm very much starting to worry about my ability to stay there once I get there because bad habits are creeping back in all over the place. 

I eat waaaay too much fast food.  Its all food that fits in my program, but still a bad habit.
At Burger King, I eat the burger shots.  Its a little high in fat and carbs, but not absurd.                                                       
At Taco Bell, I eat two crunchy tacos.  (I used to only be able to eat one :-(   )
At Wendy's, of course, I eat the chili.
I even eat one slice of whole wheat pizza with low fat cheese on it.

Again, not horrible stuff, but way more fast food than I should be eating.  I know that.  I just have to get it under control!

I'm not taking my vitamins regularly as I should.  I have no clue why.  I do take my Vitamin D, cuz they're gummies and I like them.  But I don't always remember to take my multi, my B-12, etc.

I really have to get back on track!  But for now, I'm doing well.

 

Sorry I haven't updated recently.  I never wanted to be one of those people who never touch their blog after surgery.

So where are we?  I am 3 and a half months post op and down 89 freakin pounds!  Its truly amazing.
What's different in my life?  Well eating is something I do just because I have to.  They say the hunger eventually comes back, but so far... so good.  I do eat much smaller portions than ever before.

I am incredibly busy this fall.  I am teaching TWO different marching bands, I'm on the board of education in town, I judge band competitions every weekend and I play in a handbell choir at church.  I have NO time to exercise.  I'm doing well without it, but I miss the feeling I used to get when I'd go to the gym and/or meet with the personal trainer.  Once the fall season dies down, I will be back to my exercise regimen.

My 3 month blood work was pretty good.  My cholesterol has dropped substantially.  My triglicerides were cut in HALF.  My liver numbers which were crazy high in the past are now within normal levels.  I do have a vitamin D deficiency tho.

What am I doing right?  Eating the great meals.  Eating great portion sizes.  Taking my Vitamin D supplements.  Taking my Urso Forte (most of the time)  Drinking a protein shake most days.

What am I doing wrong?  I snack too freakin much.  My snacks are good, healthy snacks, but the habit of snacking just needs to stop!   I'm still not taking my calcium.  I just hate every calcium supplement in the world.  Because I'm supposed to take Calcium Citrate with Vitamin D in it, I do have the D deficiency I mentioned earlier.  If anyone knows a good Calcium Citrate that's easy to take ... I'm all ears!

Other than that, life is good.  I can't complain.  Almost 90 lbs in 3 months is HUGE... well not anymore, now its just BIG.

For so many years, I've been MORBIDLY obese.  But now that my BMI has dropped below 40, I am simply OBESE!

I've never been so happy to be obese before.  LoL.

I guess I'm doing ok.  I'm still not taking my calcium, but other than that, I'm finding things to eat and getting most of my protein in.  I've fallen in love with salad, which is odd because pre-op I hated it.  I know its very little protein (i dont' WANT to add shrimp or crab to it) so I'll drink a shake later.  Besides, I get plenty of protein at my other meals.

So I guess that's it for now.  I'm happily obese and still losing!

Tomorrow I will be seven weeks out and so far, my weight loss is going very well.  I've lost about 55 lbs to date.

Unfortunately, there are some things (outside of the weight) that are really starting to piss me off.

Eating has become a real pain in the ass.  I almost don't want to do it anymore.  I don't LIKE eating anything anymore.  There are so few things I can eat that make me feel ok (pouch-wise.  I don't mean emotionally ok). 

For breakfast, I'm ok.  Egg beaters work great.  Sometimes I add a slice of cheese.  Sometimes I even make a sandwich out of it on the Pepperidge Farms whole wheat sandwich thins.   Other times, I'll toast the sandwich thins, add some fat-free cream cheese and an ounce or two of lox.   It gets a little boring at times, but breakfast is covered.

Lunch and Dinner, now that's another story.  Almost anything I eat is too freakin dry.   Even moist chicken, turkey, super lean (96%) ground beef.  Its moist when it goes in my mouth, but by the time I chew it a zillion times, its the dryest piece of crap I ever tried to swallow.  Fish, isn't too bad, but seriously, how often can you eat fish twice a day?

I want to drink while I eat, SOOOOO bad.  I know I can't, but sometimes I think its killing me not be able to do it.  Food is just awful!  Even things in sauces suck, cuz the sauce goes down immediatly, and I'm stuck with this dry piece of crap in my mouth.  Then its tough to go down.  I really dislike meal times and wish I didn't need to eat at all.

On ANOTHER topic, I am NOT taking calcium.  I give up.  I'm just not doing it.  I have tried every supplement under the sun and can not find anything that is either too big, or absolutely disgusting.  Let my teeth fall out, let my bones deteriorate.  I AM NOT TAKING CALCIUM anymore.

See, I told you I was getting frustrated!

I am now 6 weeks out (as of tomorrow) and had lost quite a bit of weight (about 42 lbs) in the first 5 weeks.  Then I hit my first plateau.  It was very frustrating.  I used to laugh at people like me thinking "You lost 42 lbs in 5 weeks, what are you freaking out about?"  LOL.  And there I was, FREAKING OUT! 

I changed my exercise habits, swam some laps and went back to the gym, and yes .... the stall hath ended!  In the last week, I lost 10 more pounds, and I am now officially down FIFTY TWO POUNDS!!!

I went to the gym and weighed myself in the locker room and it said 285.  I couldn't beleive it.  I started at 337 and thought I was perpetually stuck at 295.  LOL.  As I said, I didn't beleive it, so I went into the trainer's office and weighed myself on HIS scale and sure enough ... 285!!!  I lost 52 lbs in 6 weeks!  (Ya might notice alot of exclamation points today.  I'm pretty freakin' excited!!!)

Things I'm still doing wrong: 

Not taking my calcium- I did order some chews from BA.  I'm hoping those will do the trick.

Snacking a bit more than I should- but I'm staying with low calorie, low carb, sugar free snacks- I'm just afraid of old habits creeping in.

Not exercising every day.  Only every couple of days.  But I do try to stay active.

If I can fix these things, and continue to find good things to put in my pouch, I'll be a greek god in no time!

Well, here we are.  one month out.  Its pretty exciting that I've lost 42 lbs in those four weeks.  I used to read people's blogs as I prepared for my own surgery and laugh at people who lost what I thought was tons of weight but were frustrated it wasn't enough.  Yet here I am.  complaining i've ONLY lost 42 lbs in a month.  I know its crazy.  I just wanted to be in the 45-50 lbs gone range.

The pain is gone.  I am back.  100% recovered.  Dr. Abkin cleared me today for full diet and full activity.  Its a little scary having all the food in the world at my disposal.  Good thing I've discovered Trader Joe's.  Great food there. Lots of variety and I can still get my protein needs.

Supplements-  yeah, I'm not keeping up with them as much as I should.  Its the Calcium that's killing me.  The pills are too large to swallow (even cut up and yes, even the citrical PETITES)  The liquid tastes like chalk, so that leaves chewables.  They are also gigantic and I have to take SIX of them a day.  Well I just don't.  if someone has a better solution to my calcium dliemna, I'm all ears.

I'm a little ticked off that my insurance will only cover three visits a year with my nut.  The time I spend with her is INVALUABLE.  She's my rock and my support to make sure I don't stray from the program and Horizon Blue Cross doesn't see it that way.  I've gotten letters of medical necessity from my surgeon and my therapist.  I'm hoping to get a couple more and then go hard at the insurance company.  I don't expect much to come from it, but I'ma try anyways.

Well, that's about it.  I'll post again when I have something new to say!!

Peace out, cub scouts!

I haven't posted in a few days so I figured I should.  My surgery was two weeks and one day ago.  As of today, I am officially down a whopping 27 lbs!  That's 27 lbs I'll never see again.  And ya know what? ..... I don't miss it.

I went in to see Dr. Iannace today because I was concerned that one of my incisions is STILL bleeding and oozing.  He said its NOT infected and that I just have to let it run its course.  In fact, he said all 5 of my incisions look good and I'm doing well.  

I still have lower left abdomen pain and some days (like today) it's pretty bad, but he says there's nothing I can do about it.  He said the activity aggravates it, but that without the activity it won't go away.  SOOO, I trudge on.  I'm walking a mile at a clip now.  that takes about a half an hour.

I am pretty much like everyone I've read about on here.  I'm doing the best I can to get all my water and all my protein, but honestly, I'm not getting it all.  Today I ate about 550 calories and 75.1 grams of protein so I guess it was ok.  Still not enough water though.  I'm eating ALOT of fish- mostly tuna for lunch and salmon for dinner.  Tonight I'm a little hungry, which is weird cuz its only the 2nd time in two weeks I've actually been hungry.  Its not a dire hunger where I have to eat a whole pizza pie, but its definately telling me to eat something.  But I won't.  I can deal with it.

I wish more of my friends on here would update their blogs more frequently.  I don't want to think I'm the only one going through all this.

ok, I guess that's it for now. 

That's a very good question.  I had my first real TEST today (Father's Day of all days) and I don't think I did very well.

My brother is here visiting from Hilton Head.  It is great to have him here.  It really is, but tonight was something I didn't anticipate.

Because Uncle Josh is here, tonight, for dinner, my wife decided we should have cheeseburgers made on the grill and some fresh corn on the cob.  Now, I HAVE come to accept that my family will continue to eat foods I can not (especially while I'm still on liquids).  I'm quite enjoying the limited foods I am permitted to eat.  But like many of us, juicy cheeseburgers made on the grill with the juices seepeing out and a side of fresh corn on the cob are my weaknesses.  I LOVE my red meat. ( I know, I know ... LOL)

Now my wife is trying to be as supportive as she can be.  She specifically asked me if I wanted them to eat in another room, Or if I wanted to watch TV while they ate and eat my stuff later.  I said NO.  The family is eating and I will eat with them.  If I can't handle it, then I will get up and go into the other room.  But i NEED to try this.  And so I did.  As Uncle Josh brought the burgers (medium rare with the cheese melting off the sides) to the table, I sat down with my yummy split pea soup. (which I DO like -- just not as much as cheeseburgers! 

Now I had prepared myself for what the food what look like.  I knew it would look yummy beyond belief.  I knew I'd want it.  But I also knew I could be strong.  I was doing the right thing.  Here's what I was NOT prepared for --- People TALKING about their food.  I just didn't realize how much people do that.  How descriptive their words are.  That just DESTROYED to me tears. 

Uncle Josh-  How's everyone's burger?  Did I make them the way you like them?
L- Yummy.  Juicy just like I like it
E- Yup.  Not too dry.  Its perfect. and the cheese is just melted perfect enough
E- And this corn is so good, I already got it stuck in my teeth.
UJ- You can see how good MINE was cuz its gone already! 

You get the idea.  Its wasn't just seeing the food that killed me.  I was just not prepared for how people TALK about food.  I made it through my soup, and went into the other room before I cried.

I entitled this blog, "How do we measure success?"   Lemme say why.  What IS success?  Is it getting my 64 oz of liquids every day?  Is it getting in my 80gms of protein every day?  Is it NOT saying "Fuck This" and having a burger that would have killed me or at least made me dump?  Is it making through a meal with your family and NOT crying?  HOW DO WE MEASURE SUCCESS?

I know my friends on here will tell me I'm going great and that tonight was a success. At least I didn't do something stupid that I'd have regreted only minutes later.  But I'm not a success.  Not tonight I'm not.  I CRIED because my family ate something and did exactly what they'd do everynight, and I wasn't prepared for it and couldn't deal with it.  FAILURE!

I know that because of these short-term failures, I will be a long-term success.  I KNOW that.  but DAMN, it was hard tonight.

My stomach is now the size of an egg.  I now have 5 very painful staple sections in my abdomen and I'm on clear liquids only.  Came home from the hospital yesterday and I have to say, I've had my good moments and my bad ones.  Want some advice?  Well here it is ... DON'T STOP TAKING YOUR PAIN MEDS.

These meds are making the difference between life and what seems like death.  They kick in in about 15-20 minuts and the first hour after that is GLORIOUS.  The last 30 minutes before you take them again, now THAT sucks.  I'm really trying, because of a family history of narcotics dependancy, I'im trying to be very strict with what i allow myself and what I don't.

Having said that, take all you can. Its is CRUCIAL.  Much more than that I can't really tell you cuz i"m still just kind of "achin it out" over hear.  I go for my weekly follow up on Friday, June 26 so we'll get a better idea of where we are.

I"ll keep y'all posted