Jennifer B.

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OMG~~ 
I can't believe it is gone forever.  I was offical weighted in at the doctor's today for my six month follow up.  He was very happy and excited at the progress I am making.  He actually said that I was above average.  At my consultation he plotted me on the chart at 90 lbs at 6 months and I am 10 above that.  I am so excited.  And I am just loving the way my body is looking.  I haven't felt this much confidence in a long time.  

Just a small up date. Thanks for all the support from everyone

Jenn

Well I had a really great weekend.  I know it has been a while since I have wrote.  Update on the ex.  He didn't come and live with me. He actually chose to go back to a girl that is still listed on facebook as single.  But hey what do I care.  Again back on focus on working on myself. 

So as of today I have lost a total of 89 lbs in 5 months.  I have 11 lbs to go to make it to my 100 lb mark.  Which I am just blown away.  If you had told me last year at this time that I would be 100 lbs less than I was then.  I would have come up with some excuse and be like you are crazy.  But in reality, my brain was ready back in December and the I made my mind up.  Everyone that I love and care about is so excited for me and that just makes it even better. 

I posted some new photos in my new skinny jeans, which I love to wear because it really shows off my new figure.  But they are even a little too big.  But they will do for now. 

I have dropped 5 jeans sizes since I started this journey.  I just can't wait to go and shop in the normal stores.  I know LB was always good to me, but I won't miss going into that store anymore.

Jenn

Well I am down 73 lbs.  And having some stress in my life right now.  It is offical my ex husband is moving in with me and kids.    It is putting more stress on me right now and I am having really weird dreams about our past relationship.  I don't hate him.  I am totally over that.  I still do care about him and won't want anything to happen to him, of course unless I did it to him.  LOL  He has been over a couple of times to do thing with the boys and drop off some things.  And every time I look at him I think what he did he do in the past to make me happy.  I am not sure.  I know I am happy now but I not sure what kind of feelings to have towards him. 

Well I am sorry to ramble.  But I guess I just needed that.

 

I just want to put out there a many thanks to all the people that I have met on here and all the support everyone has given me.  Today I am 1 day away from my 3 month surgery anniversary and I just hit 70 lbs GONE FOREVER!  It is just amazing.  I went for my post op appt yesterday and Dr. Dallal said everything looks good and he was very happy to see the progress.  I go back in 3 months, with blood work results in hand.  Hopefully they will be good. 

Well I broke my own goal of 60 - 70 before September.  Now I am only two weeks ahead of the game but hey whatever works right.  I have definately seen a slow down the in weight lost but it is definately come off.   I am feeling great and never had so much energy.

OT... As many of you know that my ex husband and I are trying to have a friendship now that he is not with the girlfriend anymore.  Well my car was in the shop over this past weekend and I borrowed my grandfather's car and I needed to return it on Monday night after work.  Well he was so kind and picked me and the boys up at Gram's and took up home on his way to work.  Oh and he still doesn't have a place to stay and he is suppose to be out of their house by Labor Day.  So we get in the car and my youngest (Jason) comes right out and says "Daddy are you coming to live with us?"  I just turned my head and giggled.  All I have to say is Out of the Mouth of Babes.  LOL.   Well he did come up and visit for a while.  The first time in 7 years that we actually were in the same room were we had to talk about something other than the kids.  Well it was very alkward but I got through it.  I also found out a very disturbing piece of information.  One of the main reasons that he and the girlfriend broke up was that she had had the WLS.  Which some of you would be like what is the big deal.  Well he added that she gained 70 lbs to qualify for the surgery.  She actually only needed to lose 40 - 50 lbs but she decided that if she gained weight she would be better off with the surgery.   I was just shocked.  I knew she had had the surgery but I didn't realized she had gain a small kid for it.  I figured that she had gained some weight since their relationship started and needed it.  Well was I wrong.    And I was kinda of pissed because she also went to my surgeon.  Now I know that is stupid but hey a girl has to want some of those things for herself.  LOL..

Well I just thought that my friends on here would love to here that there are some people out there that don't take our tool seriously and think it is the easy way out. 

I love my tool and I will always try and respect it!!

Bye for now.

Jenn

Boy I was just reading back on some of my blogs from the last couple of weeks. And in June when I had lost 40 some lbs I was thinking that I would be down 60 - 70 lbs by September. But guess what, that is not the case. It is the end of July and I have already lost 63 lbs and hopefully by the end of the week I will be closer to 70 lbs. I am just in shock. I still don't like what I see in the mirror when I don't have clothes on but when I have clothes on I do like the way stuff is fitting now. I do have a lot of clothes that are just too big now and I really need to start looking for some new stuff but I am really truly trying to hold out. 

OT... and I was thinking that I really need to and wait unti I am truly healed from the fat person that once lived on the outside and the new skinny person is coming out to be reborn.  I am definately going to play the field when it comes to men and not try and start anything new with anyone right now.  I did discover that I thought at one time I was the broken one but not anymore.  I know what I want it is the boys that I have meet recently and not so recently.  They are the broken ones.  LOL 

So anyway... new me new mind new body... Watch out world here I come.

Jenn

Well I posted new progression photos from the last time.  I am down 15 lbs since the last photos.   I can definately see the different but it just looks to me that everything is moving south.  AHAHAHAHHA 

Well just have to work extra hard at getting that toned down. 

Well more drama is coming into my life.  On Monday I received an email from my ex husband's ex girlfriend.  It was a history of emails between my son's godmother and my ex's trying to get together for lunch and drinks.  My son's godmother was actually our old pastor and help my ex during some rough times growing up.   So I am assuming that he is going to her for some guidance.  And of course the ex girlfriend doesn't know the pastor friend so it looks like he is trying to set up dates with this woman.  LOL  Well I received a phone call from my ex on Monday night telling me that he might be taking me up on my offer of moving in.  AHAHHAHAHAH Well I guess if that is what is suppose to happen it just needs to happen.  GOD ONLY GIVES YOU WHAT YOU CAN HANDLE, right?  Well I keep on saying this to myself. 

And I am not going to let this stress me out.  I am too much postive stuff going my way right now.  Met a very nice sweet guy that has lots of relationship potential and I am starting my new life.  So everyone just say a prayer for me and keep the stress and black cloud from looming overhead.  GOOD thoughts!!


Jenn

Well people here wer are at another start of another week.  I am tired a hell today.   I didn't have a crazy weekend just a interesting weekend.  Well for those who know you and read my blog you know that last weekend I was puma and had my very own boy toy.  Because of this my confidence was a little pumped up.  Good I haven't felt that good about myself in a long time.  So I decided to repost my personal add on match.  Yes I have tried this before and meet some really nice people and some real weirdos.  But what could be better than an updated photo with the confidence back in my eyes.  So anyway, I posted my profile up there and just did some lurking for a while and then Friday night after work and I sitting at my desk and I see this new profile pop up.  Not to bad looking single parent as well. And I definately come to the conclusion that I think I really need to that type of connection with someone.  Because they understand what is happening when you are a single parent.  So I "wink".  And with 10 minutes he winks back.  Ok we made a connection.  YEA... ok lets feel him out and see what he has to say on the chat session.  Well three hours later and after midnight, we had great conversation and the desire to meet each other.  Well because of my non mommy weekends not appearing anytime soon.  OK people I am working on that.  We determined that it was going to be a little harder to meet.  But that is ok because good things come to those who wait.   On Saturday was a having a lazy day and basically relaxed and didn't do too much of anything but take the boys to the park to release some energy.  But I get on the computer around dinner time and there is JG he says Hi I said Hi and again we start talking for about an hour.  Well this week his son is with his mom for the week so he has a lot of free time on his hands for this week at least.  LOL.  So we were going to talk again around 8 ish after my boys went to bed.  Well again got in touch with each other and he asked if he could come down and we could have coffee.  Well I told him that my house was a mess and that I really didn't know if that was a good idea.  Well he was such a sweetie and told me that we could sit outside of my condo building and just enjoy our coffee.   Well we did and three hours later after have some great conversation and getting to know each other.  I had a very nice kiss goodnight.  So he came over last night and overcourse I invited him up to my place last night.  My boys were in bed and we had a great time again just sitting around watching some TV and chatting again.  And it did get a little hot and heavy, but again I was a good girl and controlled myself because for some reason, my heart and head and telling me that this might have some good potential for dating.  And yes people I do have a tendency to rush into things and do things before I think.  But I have my little angel on my shoulder telling me different.  Slow and steady wins the race.   Well we do have some obstacles in front of us after his son come back home because he is the sole caregiver and doesn't really have too much family around.  But we have chatted about that we and we are going to take it one day at a time to see what is in our future if we have a future.

Well another good things has happened I am down another 3 lbs.  And the big 60 is coming faster than the 50 did, which is really good.

PS I did tell JG that I had the surgery and he is inspired by me.  Which I think is ironic.  But he is definately  a person that would be a cheerleader in this crazy journey.  LOL

More updates to come

Jenn

Well hello people!  I can't believe tomorrow will be 2 months since I had the surgery and I just love my tool.  I am down 52 lbs since I started the crazy journey as I like to refer to it as.   I am so excited.  I wanted to be down 50 by the 4th of July but I worked on a up and down stall for the first two weeks of the month and then this morning BAM!! this morning 3 lbs gone and over the hump.

I had a really great weekend.  I thought it was going to be a difficult one because my ex broke up with his girlfriend.  Yes the one he cheated on me with 7 years ago and now he "can't take our kids for his weekends because it is just really bad" and he is looking for a new place to live but that is going to take time.  So for right now I have lost my non mommy weekends for a while and I have to say that I feel bad for him and pissed off at both of them because even 7 years later they are still screwing with my life.  A life I put past me and moved on from and was very happy too.   

Well anyway a mutual friend of ours was a having a block party and she invited both of us so he could see if his kids and spend time with them.  Well he spent a total of 2-1/2 hours with them and then went off to a dinner engagement he made after he told me he wasn't going to take his kids.  Well this made me a little upset. 

But I got over it when a cute boy,  yes I said boy (24 years old) walked up to our friend's house and said hi my name is Chris.  Well Chris is a long time friend of the friends that I was at.   And of course did I say that I was a little over dressed for the block party.  Because since I have lost the weight I had to make sure I was looking good in the outfit I was wearing, again since the ex was going to be there also.  LOL!!  Well Chris and I flirted all night long.  We played drinking games. Yes everyone drank beer and I was drinking water.  Which is so much fun.   Well needless to say, I was Mrs. Robinson on Saturday night and I think that I like the fact that I could have a little boy toy in my near future.  We had a great time together and I might just continue to play. 

Wow it is just amazing how your confidence goes up in just a little bit of time.  I would have never thought that I would be attracted to a younger guy, but hey I guess the Puma is coming out now.  LOL

Have a great week and I will check in soon. 

Love all you guys.

Jenn

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