2 Months Post-Op

Aug 12, 2010

So, pretty much just moving along here.  I'm down 36 pounds at 2 months post-op.  Still losing a little slower than the average (in my opinion).  But, I'm losing and its all good.  I'm at a solid size 20 from a 26.  Seriously, I can't complain.  I took my 2 month post op pictures last night (I will take them on the 11th of everymonth to show progress).  There is definitely a difference.  I should post them, but kind of embarrassed which is kinda dumb.  We're all on here for the same exact reason.  It's not like I'm going to post them for Playboy magazine. 

Anyway, I'm really busy with work.  My youngest son just started youth football.  I'm a board member and his team manager so I have been a very busy girl.  At practice, I I'm running around constantly.  Practices are 2 hrs long, 5 days a week.  That is where the majority of my excercise comes from.  But, I'm serious when I say I'm running around the entire time.  It will slow down once things get more organized.  We have 300 kids this year and we're just really busy making sure all kids, coaches and other staff have everything in.  Plus, I take a morning and afternoon walk on my breaks at work.  They are only approx 1/3 mile each walk, but it's something!

Food has become an issue for me. Again.  I'm starting to crave things.  I will have a bite of something I really want, but never more than that and I dont do that very often.  I still think about food all the time.  But I also think about my weight loss all the time.  In fact, it's constantly on my mind.  I do crave salty types of foods.  I eat nuts a lot to help the craving, but I want chips.  I have had quite a few the past couple of weeks at bbq's and stuff, but not to many.  I have learned that I cannot eat a hamburger patty (even a couple bites), hotdogs, or any other weird types of meat.  They get stuck and i'm terrible sick for about an hour.  Like I'm in tears nauseous.  I have been doing terrible at getting all of my water and vitamins in.  I'm such a busy single mom, I tend to forget about me even though my weight loss is always on my mind.

I know I still have 77 pounds to go, and sometimes even that's depressing, but I can say without a doubt, that I am happier than I have been in a long time!  I always knew my depression came from being fat.  I know it's wrong to base my happiness on my weight, but I did.  I was so miserable.  I hated myself.  I was so embarrased.  I still don't date outside of a "special" friend I've had for a couple years.  He loves me regardless of what I look like, but he also has a weight problem and I can't get passed that.  I'm hoping he will do better, and I think he tries, but I notice he does no exercising at all unless I get him to do it with me.  Again, he's like my best friend.  He wants the whole package with me, but I don't feel the same way.  I love him as a friend.  And I like "dating" him, but I can't bring myself to feel anything more. 

So, wow!  I just vented a lot of what's on my mind.  I may do this more often.  I really need to get back to work.

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