6 Months (87 pounds)
Sep 07, 2009
I'm down 87 pounds, which makes 12 pounds for this past month. What do I attribute the double digits to? PROTEIN SHAKES! I started back on them and wow, the weight started flying off compared to what it had been doing. I've been impressed! I only drink one a day, in the mornings. It tends to keep me pretty satiated throughout the day, although I have been able to eat a little better as the month has progressed. At first I thought it was going to practically keep me from wanting to eat....I guess my body has gotten used to it somewhat.
Life has been great at 6 months out. I've had lots of little wows along the way and I try to really enjoy them as they come. I've been shopping in regular stores along with some plus-sizes still. I haven't lost enough to completely get out of them and you know what? It actually comforts me a little bit. That is what I feel safe in. This has been a major [email protected](*& for me. Right now I am enjoying the additional options, but on the other hand, I feel lost. Gosh, I might have to find me a "style" now!
My ongoing exhaustion has let up this month as well -- this could also be attributable to the protein shakes...maybe?!!? I don't know. I am glad I don't have to nap multiple times per day though. I have felt much more 'normal.' My hair loss has slowed up a bit -- now I just have frizzies from hell instead! It's o.k. though, I will take it in trade for all the things I have gained! FREEDOM is at the top of this list. I don't feel so self-conscious when I go out in public now -- the anxiety in some situations has let up. I feel like I 'fit in' better with groups of people and I am enjoying blending in!
The ONLY negative in my life right now is a skin rash of sorts. I have no idea if it's even remotely related to the DS (vitamins, etc...) but I hope to find out something soon. It spreads and spreads and itches and itches every day. It affects my sleep. The meds/creams/gels/lotions the doctors have given me have done NOTHING, including a cortisone shot in the butt. I'm going to have my blood drawn tomorrow for my 6 month labs so I suppose if it could be related to vitamins, it will show there.
Thanks to everyone who has been so supportive of me and those of you who have answered my questions and given me suggestions. I really appreciate the help and support and I only hope I can give back half as much as you guys have given me in this short amount of time. I haven't taken my official pics for my 6 months yet so I suppose my swimsuit pic will have to do this month.....hehe
5 Months out and 75 pounds down!
Aug 05, 2009
This past month I lost 6 pounds. I am starting to get annoyed at how slow things are coming off but I know logically I need to quit doing this to myself. I also know that putting the scale away would help but I can't do it! I weigh every morning just HOPING for a new number! Strange how that dang scale can start off your day on either foot.
I've started on a good probiotic at the urging of some wonderful vets and I THINK things are going better for me. I am starting back on the protein shakes daily, once I receive them in the mail. I think these will help me....if with nothing else, then peace of mind. I'm still walking at work but haven't started "working out" per se. I plan to add that to my 'routine' in the very near future as we bought a GREAT piece of equipment that I can't wait to start using!
I'm still really tired in the afternoons and usually nap. My surgeon has postponed my next follow up yet again so I am not sure when I will finally have my labs done. I may just go ahead and get a list and have it done here locally instead of waiting.
Life has been good. I have been so busy but my DS lifestyle has been very doable. YES, I still have to eat pretty often to keep my tummy happy. My husband says I am eating ALL the time. The downside is that I keep trying to shove my 'leftovers' at him...not smart! He says he's going to get as big as a house while I shrink away. I am about one size and 30 pounds away from where I was when I first met him so that is kinda my mental goal right now. I would soooo love to hit it by Christmas but I don't know that it's going to happen. I haven't been SUPER low-carbing it but I have definitely kept myself in line on the carbs. I am very mindful of what I am eaiting and it's so nice to not just sit and eat without thinking about it......not just stuffing myself full for no good reason. Eating is like a duty now LOL
I officially hate my arms at this point and expect they will become more and more of a problem as the rest of my body continues ftting into smaller 'regular' clothes. I am still losing hair and my acne is kicking into overdrive, but these are all things I can deal with. I'm trading these things for finally ALMOST having a waist again....being able to buy clothes in regular stores and not having to look at plus size all the time (I'm on the border) and being able to wear my strappy sandles/wedges again. I'll take it!
Anyway, that's all I will say. I am happy and that's what matters! My husband says he's proud of me nearly every day. I was laid off from my job but I have found a new one that I start in September, most likely. I can't ask for anything more.
4 Months (-69 pounds)
Jul 06, 2009
My goal had been to be 70 pounds down by my 4 mo. surgiversary (I believe I was down 61 at 3 mo.) and I ALMOST made it, sliding in at 69! I will take it!!! I can't believe the difference this surgery has made in my life already. I really do feel a sense of freedom.
I will get the "negatives" out there first and then end with the good stuff. First, my hair has been falling out, as expected, for almost a month now. It's getting worse, not better, but I expected it and was prepared for it. It's a fact of life. Secondly, and more disturbing for me, I am dog-tired ALL of the time! My energy had been great until about 2 weeks ago. This is a tired I have never experienced before - I have LITERALLY fallen asleep at work! I am getting plenty of sleep at night and have been taking all of the vitamins on my schedule. I had some blood drawn late last week and my PCP said all of them are fine. I asked them to mail me a copy because I want to see them for myself. I figure it may be that I am not low for her standards, but may be for mine. So hopefully I will see that soon. That's about all the negative I have had. On to the good stuff....
I started out with two closets of clothes in the beginning. I had the one that I hoped so desperately to be able to fit back into one day, and then I had the one I actually wore clothes out of. The closet I 'shop' from each morning has been a changin'! I started all of this in a size 26 pants and 22/24 tops and now I am wearing 18's and 20's on the bottoms and 16's and 18's on top. Not bad for 4 months! Most of my other positive things are little in the grand scheme of things but they mean so much to me and bring a smile to my face every day:
*I sit down in chairs without the hesitation now...none of the "will I fit?" "will it hold me?" Granted, I am still 250 lbs, but I FEEL so much lighter!
*I have more pep in my step....I walk faster and prouder...hold my head up high more often....and most importantly I SMILE without having to make myself!
*People are noticing! People say things to me and tell me how great I look. The attention can be a double edged sword for me because I don't typically like attention on me, but it does make me feel good....times are a changin'!
*I've worn a few wedge-heeled sandals to work...this would NOT have happened over 4 months ago. My plantar fascitis would have made sure of it! I am nowhere near wearing any stilettos yet but I see them in my future!
*I WANT to do things around the house now....I don't make excuses, I make suggestions! Hello kitchen renovation!
*I dress like a girl! I know some of you might be thinking HUH? I feel my femininity is coming back. It's hard to explain but surely I am not the only one who started to feel sort of androgynous with the extra weight. I used to focus on covering up as much as possible and I guess I was pretty frumpy. Now I try to dress better and feel 'prettier.' My husband has always said he loves me no matter what but I can certainly tell he's excited about THIS part!
So what has eating been like? Well, I must say I have come a long way in the last few months. I have let a few more carbs/sugars sneak into my life but I am trying not to go crazy. In general, I have been allowing myself a few more carbs, etc... for 'special occasions' and once in a while sort of things. In the first few months after surgery, not only did I not want the carbs/sugars, I was too afraid to try them. If we had a birthday party at work or went out to dinner with friends, I wouldn't even try the carby/sugary stuff. Now, I still concentrate on the protein but allow myself a few indulgences here and there. I just don't go crazy. I eat WAY less food of course but I feel like I can go to a restaurant now and it isn't OBVIOUS I had surgery or something. I always take home leftovers and enjoy another meal or two out of them. I feel confident in going to lunch with friends, etc... because I can always find something. At first it was a little more difficult.
I am SO happy with my choice to have the DS. I don't have any bathroom problems at all, nor have I had to take anything to control any part of this. I do have some occasional gas but it's after eating the aforementioned carbs/sugars that have snuck in more frequently (read: more than never!). If I can get the tired thing figured out and my hair stops falling out, everything will be perfect!
Jun 02, 2009
Everything seemed to pretty much steadily get better after I returned to work at 6 weeks. I have had a few bad things happen (like ER visits) but I am hoping to stay 'normal' now for a while. I'm eating more and more...in fact, sometimes I worry about how much I can eat. I try to focus on good proteins first and then if I want some other things I try them. I have been a little bit afraid of some things (and some, for good reason!) and I haven't gone all out yet but I have slipped a few things in here and there to see how it goes. I am happy with my weightloss to this point. It definitely doesn't follow any type of pattern for me. I lost 45 the first month, then 5 the second month and 11 this month.....strange! I am enjoying shopping out of my "small clothes that will never fit again" closet! It's just like buying new stuff all over again but it's free! I have SO much more energy and I have been doing so much more in my 'spare' time. I've been diligently walking at work every day and getting out more to do things with friends. Unfortunately I was laid off from my job with the local police dept. My position ends at the end of June. I will take this time to work on myself, and obviously finding another job, but I am trying not to stress about it too much. I've never been unemployed before so this is all new to me. I have my moments where I am very sad. I have been here long enough to get to know a lot of people and make new friends. It figures it always happens that way!
As for my DS, I am a happy camper. I struggle some days to get all of my vits in but I push myself because I know how very important it is. That reminds me of a question, should any of you have any ideas -- I have had some pain in my calves for about a week now and I am starting to wonder if it could be from some sort of deficiency creeping up. Any ideas? It almost feels like the charlie horse feeling but it's pretty constant and not quite so severe....it feels muscular.
Now for the pics. I hope they show up since it's my first attempt at getting them in the post. Thanks to everyone who has been so supportive of me and always willing to listen and lend advice on this huge adventure we're all on.
2 Mo. Surgiversary
May 03, 2009
So, two months ago today I was nervously awaiting a surgery that I was somewhat unsure of. I had faith but having been through the lapband drama previously, I was a little bit apprehensive. Dr. Inman took care of the hard part that day and I have been living the life ever since. The first month was very hard. The two weeks after that were less hard, and the last 2 weeks have been MUCH MUCH better! It really does get better each and every day. There are some positives and negatives but the positives FAR outweigh the negatives.
I'm moving toward being able to fit in my closet full of smaller clothes!
I can actually cross my legs for longer periods of time without fidgeting.
I feel like my body can move faster (walking, getting up from a seated position, etc.).
My breathing has improved tremendously.
I feel FULL when I eat. I don't know that I've ever felt this before except for when I would get uncomfortably full and be miserable!
People say I seem happier.
I'm not swollen all over.
I can sit in the recliner without my thighs rubbing against both arm rests (hey, maybe that's why it's easier to get up!)
I have the energy and desire to do stuff around the house and not depend on hubby so much
one word....ACNE! I feel like a teenager!
Food still has control in my life but in a completely different way -- now I have to make myself eat even when I don't want to! (this really isn't a negative)
I hate pills (but I signed up for this part)
Some hair is falling out here and there
Cramping in the morning before BMs
That's really about all for the negatives and even they aren't so bad (other than the ACNE).
I posted a little over a week ago about my first stall. I ate more and more, which led to 6 pounds lost this past week! That was after more than 2 weeks of nothing. I'm trusting it now, o.k.? I didn't break it and I'm doing fine!
Eating as often as I do certainly takes some getting used to. People at work probably wonder how I am eating all the time and still losing weight -- oh well! It's working for me. I got all excited last week when a guy I was talking to said, "a friend of mine had the same surgery as you." I said, "I doubt it...most people have never heard of the surgery I had." He said, "you had the duodenal something right?" I got this huge grin on my face and my brain was saying, "you've heard of it? Oh my god....tell me all about your friend!" LOL His friend (male) is 3-4 years out and still maintaining at his goal weight. He hasn't had any major problems or anything like that.
The DS is working for me. I can't wait until I see all of my family at Christmas. I wonder what I will look like and what size I will be by then. That would be at about 9 months out.
I'd also like to thank the Academy (a.k.a. everyone who has given me so much support and advice). I couldn't have made it through as calmly as I have without your input, so Thank you!
If you are awaiting your surgery day....it will get here, and sooner than you think! Get ready because you are in for the best thing that has ever happened to you!
You can see what my 50 pound loss looks like on my profile. I have posted pics there!
1 month surgiversary
Apr 03, 2009
My one month surgiversary is today!!!! Some days it feels like it was just yesterday I was coming home from the hospital and other days it feels like it's been 3 months!
I'm posting this mostly because many pre-ops have emailed me and said they really appreciate reading about peoples' experiences. Also, if any of you veteran DSers have any suggestions they are always welcome!
I probably haven't done everything perfectly but I have done the best I can with what I have. The main reason for the confusion is that I have all of the wonderful info. from this site running through my head while I am also reading the booklet of info. from my doctor. They don't always jive!
So onto the good news....I have lost 45 pounds in one friggin month! How does that even seem possible? My husband and other friends have said you can really tell in my face and right around my waist. I am terribly afraid I am going to look like a sack of skin when all of this is over -- especially since I am losing so fast. I know it will slow down though and I am hoping to start exercising in the future. I'm still off work for another 2 weeks and that is a huge relief to me. I didn't start feeling anything like normal until yesterday. It was crazy. All the sudden I woke up and didn't have the nagging constant stomach upset and bloaty feeling. I was so excited! So far so good today! I feel awful my poor husband is out doing all of the yard work with no help but I just can't.
I am way too familiar with daytime t.v.....well evening and overnight t.v. as well. Luckily I do paint and do some crafty stuff so that takes SOME of my time. Most days I have felt more like doing mindless things though -- not big on having to concentrate much.
I won't lie....I have had many days where I questioned what the heck I have done. I have had the nights where I laid here and wanted to cry because my stomach was so unsettled and upset feeling. I've wondered when I would ever be able to eat somewhat normally again. I've worried about not getting in enough this or that (especially vitamins). My vitalady order finally arrived so I am on the right track now. I just need to figure out the calcium because I cannot even fathom trying to get those big huge pills down!
Anyway, I am doing better and better MOST days and it seems I may have turned the corner for the better now. I hope to stay here because I feel much happier and have more energy. There is so much more I could probably say but I don't want to completely bore everyone.
To those who are considering the DS or waiting for their surgery date -- it's going to be hard....but I feel it will all be worth it in the end. Make sure you have support around you because you will need it. I don't care how strong you are mentally, having people to count on and depend on will make it a LOT easier for you.
I am going to have my husband take 1 mo. pics tonight so I can really look at the difference!
Lack of Appetite
Mar 25, 2009
I finally found something I can drink and get all of my fluids in (something I like that is). I know how important the protein is, not just for nutrition but for getting my strength back. I think that's why I'm getting a little concerned. I have started feeling weaker quicker rather than better wiith each day. My husband and my mom keep telling me "you have to eat and get your protein in" and I know this in my head but it's so hard to explain this feeling. It's like my stomach is unsettled all day long and I never know what it's indicating -- do I have to go to the bathroom? Am I hungry? Did something I ate/drank upset my stomach? It's like no matter what it's going to feel this way. I don't have nausea or pain really at all, it's just an unsettled feeling. I am eating some thinly sliced ham right now and I thought it sounded decent but as I start eating it I just don't want to. I'd like to just NOT EAT for 2 months! lol
I'm trying to get in more vitamins but it's the same thing with them. I just want to know that I am normal and I am not damaging myself. I am trying every day to be better about all of it. I've eaten things like lunchmeat, cocktail shrimp, chicken salad (just canned chicken and mayo), lil smokies & diff. types of cheese. None of this has given me any problems and I have eaten very little of it very slowly. My horrible gas pains I had initially have been gone about a week I guess so that is great. Anyone have any suggestions on all of this? Or do I just have to force myself? I am 3 weeks out today and have lost 38 pounds (insane!).
Mar 14, 2009
I told some folks at work that I'd probably lose 30 lbs by the time I came back to work 4-6 weeks later. In my mind I kinda doubted it, thinking, "surely not THAT much".....well I am only 11 days out today and while I know it will slow down......
I 've lost 25 POUNDS!!!!!!!!!
This is an INSANE ride....I better hang on TIGHT!!!!!!!!!
Mar 13, 2009
I am assuming that some gas (gas pains in particular) are to be expected initially. This is my biggest problem right now. The shooting gas pains and the inability to move/breath without feeling all of that pressure in my bloaty abdomen. My question is....how do you attribute this to the things you are eating/drinking vs. just something your body has to work through. Is it normal to have this in spite of what you eat or is it what I am eating that's causing it?
Up until 2 days ago, I was doing mostly liquid stuff and well......what goes in is what comes out. It was pretty chronic but I still had the gas pains. Now, having tried to eat some more solid stuff the last 2 days, I seem to have even worse gas pain and now I am NOT really getting rid of any of it. I don't feel like I need to go so I don't know if I am constipated (hence the painful gas bubble I call a stomach) or my body is just slow processing everything.
My Surgery Story
Mar 10, 2009
I went in for surgery a week from today. Some of you know I was really worried about breathing problems when I woke up because of my experiences with my band removal last year. UUGH! Let's just say I had those breathing problems x 5!!! I went through this entire thing with virtually NO pain medicine!!! They said the pain meds were affecting my breathing/oxygen saturation so I couldn't have anything but childrens' tylenol. I remember the first night, LITERALLY wanting to die. I mean of course I wanted to get through it but they couldn't do anything to take any of the pain away. I got severely winded just sitting up in bed. I had my mom and my husband there with me so that helped me SO much. I don't know what I would have done without them. I had to stay longer than expected and just got home Monday. I finally got my oxygen levels to low-normal but my breathing is still a big deal. I am trying my best to get it going again but it's a chore.
Where am I now? Basically scared....scared to eat or do much of anything! Nothing tastes good except for this white chocolate sugar free pudding my mom made me with the lactaid milk. Everything else is BLEAH! I'm scared to try anything because I don't want the gas pain/continuing diarrhea. I keep telling myself that my body is just trying to get used to my new plumbing....but then I think, "what if something is wrong and I don't know it?" I didn't have toooooo much pain yesterday but last night OMG! I have this gas pain (I guess) in my abdomen and the shooting pains were killing me! I didn't know what to do and I tried to walk around and get rid of it but it was pretty bad! I woke up this morning with the same problem so I am not sure what I am going to do about all that.
I have to hand it to those of you who have gone through this before me. It is HARD! You have all told me it will be worth it in the end so I am trusting that but right now I feel like such a whiney baby!!!