4 Months (-69 pounds)

Jul 06, 2009

I promised myself to update monthly after surgery, for my own benefit, as well as for the benefit of newbies out there.  I remember when I began my journey, I always enjoyed reading about peoples' experiences.  I wanted to know what life was REALLY like.

My goal had been to be 70 pounds down by my 4 mo. surgiversary (I believe I was down 61 at 3 mo.) and I ALMOST made it, sliding in at 69!  I will take it!!!  I can't believe the difference this surgery has made in my life already.  I really do feel a sense of freedom.

I will get the "negatives" out there first and then end with the good stuff.  First, my hair has been falling out, as expected, for almost a month now.  It's getting worse, not better, but I expected it and was prepared for it.  It's a fact of life.  Secondly, and more disturbing for me, I am dog-tired ALL of the time!  My energy had been great until about 2 weeks ago.  This is a tired I have never experienced before - I have LITERALLY fallen asleep at work!  I am getting plenty of sleep at night and have been taking all of the vitamins on my schedule.  I had some blood drawn late last week and my PCP said all of them are fine.  I asked them to mail me a copy because I want to see them for myself.  I figure it may be that I am not low for her standards, but may be for mine.  So hopefully I will see that soon.   That's about all the negative I have had.  On to the good stuff....

I started out with two closets of clothes in the beginning.  I had the one that I hoped so desperately to be able to fit back into one day, and then I had the one I actually wore clothes out of.  The closet I 'shop' from each morning has been a changin'!  I started all of this in a size 26 pants and 22/24 tops and now I am wearing 18's and 20's on the bottoms and 16's and 18's on top.  Not bad for 4 months!  Most of my other positive things are little in the grand scheme of things but they mean so much to me and bring a smile to my face every day:

*I sit down in chairs without the hesitation now...none of the "will I fit?"  "will it hold me?"  Granted, I am still 250 lbs, but I FEEL so much lighter!
*I have more pep in my step....I walk faster and prouder...hold my head up high more often....and most importantly I SMILE without having to make myself!
*People are noticing!  People say things to me and tell me how great I look.  The attention can be a double edged sword for me because I don't typically like attention on me, but it does make me feel good....times are a changin'!
*I've worn a few wedge-heeled sandals to work...this would NOT have happened over 4 months ago.  My plantar fascitis would have made sure of it!  I am nowhere near wearing any stilettos yet but I see them in my future!  
*I WANT to do things around the house now....I don't make excuses, I make suggestions!  Hello kitchen renovation!
*I dress like a girl!  I know some of you might be thinking HUH?  I feel my femininity is coming back.  It's hard to explain but surely I am not the only one who started to feel sort of androgynous with the extra weight.  I used to focus on covering up as much as possible and I guess I was pretty frumpy.  Now I try to dress better and feel 'prettier.'  My husband has always said he loves me no matter what but I can certainly tell he's excited about THIS part! 

So what has eating been like?  Well, I must say I have come a long way in the last few months.  I have let a few more carbs/sugars sneak into my life but I am trying not to go crazy.  In general, I have been allowing myself a few more carbs, etc... for 'special occasions' and once in a while sort of things.  In the first few months after surgery, not only did I not want the carbs/sugars, I was too afraid to try them.  If we had a birthday party at work or went out to dinner with friends, I wouldn't even try the carby/sugary stuff.  Now, I still concentrate on the protein but allow myself a few indulgences here and there.  I just don't go crazy.  I eat WAY less food of course but I feel like I can go to a restaurant now and it isn't OBVIOUS I had surgery or something.  I always take home leftovers and enjoy another meal or two out of them.  I feel confident in going to lunch with friends, etc... because I can always find something.  At first it was a little more difficult.

I am SO happy with my choice to have the DS.  I don't have any bathroom problems at all, nor have I had to take anything to control any part of this.  I do have some occasional gas but it's after eating the aforementioned carbs/sugars that have snuck in more frequently (read:  more than never!).  If I can get the tired thing figured out and my hair stops falling out, everything will be perfect!

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