10 1/2 months and 129 lbs lost! Woo Hoo!

Dec 31, 2010

Well, it has been 10 1/2 months since I had my surgey, and I have lost 129lbs.  It for me has been a relatively easy and flawless process.  I have had many ahh haa moments and lots of encouragement from family and friends. So as I begin this New Year I decided to share some of my thoughts, concerns ect... with you.

So when I started out this journey, I did not really have a major choice to make on whether or not to have gastric bypass. At the age of 41 I had diabetes, high blood pressure, congestive heart failure, pulmonary hypertension, living on oxygen, Sleep Apnea, Asthma, depression, High Colesterol, blood clot in my brain, cronic common illness' plagued me, major joint and back pain, mobility issues, and cronic headaches.  My doctors told me that if I did not lose the weight, I was going to die.  They said that for me to be 295 lbs in itself can cause problems, but with my health history he would be surprised if i made it through the year 2010.  So my choices were lose the weight, or die.  So, I sought out a surgeon, and had the surgery 3 months later.  So,10 1/2 months later I have cronic headaches (due to a issue not related to weight), and thats about it...sooooo when people ask me do I regret having the surgery?  Um hello.....NOT ONE BIT!!!

Here are 10 things that I want to share with you because I think they are either important and / or I was not prepared for in my journey:

1. I am cold all the time.  I love that I have lost this weight and still plan on losing the aditional 26 lbs, however I have found that as a thinner person my fat did serve one good purpose...insulation!!!!  In the big scheme of things, I would rather be cold than face the health issues caused by obesity that I was already dealing with.  Besides...the fact that my hubby is warm and snuggling up to him next to a nice warm fire is always good for the soul. :-).

2. Constipation is a new and probably permanent part of my lifestyle. I knew it could be an issue, but always thought it would  be temporary and infrequent.  However this was just not the case...I take two Senna-S daily to keep myself regular.  I get more than 64 oz of water daily so it is not due to dehydration.  So in addition to my daily vitamins I take the Senna-S and probably will for a very long time to come...if not for life.  Just another supplement to my long list of vitamins...lol.

3.  You will need to purchase clothing regularly...Savers is a great place for that and every Monday they have thier grey tag 99 cent sales...I have bought several pairs of jeans that were nice and in style for 99 cents. They also have 50% off on one other color tag on Monday's as well...the kicker is that if you are going to go on a Monday to take part in the sales...be prepared to be there for a minimum of an hour because it takes time to go through all the clothes on the racks.

4.   You will lose some hair, for me the saving grace was Taking my vitamin suppliments, also taking Biotin & keeping up on your protien, and water intake were the only way to slow down the hairloss.  They tell you that you will lose hair, but guess what...it is not limited to your head.  Boy was I shocked when I realized I lost hair elsewhere.  I guess it makes sense...but I just didn't think about it that way.  Sorry if this was too much information but this is a forum for learning so I figure I should go for the WHOLE truth.  The other things that I have had to adjust too and it has been dificult..people I have known for years, but don't see regularly...don't always recognize you.  The skin on my face is also sagging a bit and really loose,  I cannot wear my wedding bands anymore, nor does it seem plausable to have them fixed to fit me until I reach my goal, Sleeping was a bit of a challenge as I no longer have my belly to contend with...so it makes sleeping on your stomach a whole new adventure and for the last one if you thought the above was too much information skip this next paragraph as it may be to graphic for you.

Graphic part begining...

So one of the other things that has been interesting is sex...your man may be well endowed, and sex may have been gratifying for you, your sex life may have been really quite satisfying prior to surgery.  However, with your body changes there are some adjustments you might not be prepared for...first your energy level and desire for sex may increase, you may become more fertile *so be careful in the birth control area, but the one thing I didn't think about was the loss of fat in your personal area causing additional length to contend with.  This said...look out, take it easy and don't hurt yourself, and if you are both losing weight well it is the same issue times two.

Graphic part ended...

5.  Your doctors tell you that you need to exercise and maintain your muscle tone.  What I did not realize was just how little muscle tone I had.  My fat was holding my joints together, and as I lost it I began to have joint pain much more severe than I had before.  I ended up dislocating my hip and one of my shoulders.  So don't just maintain the muscle tone you have, build more as you exercies because your weightloss means you don't have the fat there to hold your body together anymore.  Just a reminder Muscle weighs more than fat so when you are building muscle your weight loss may slow a bit, but it is important to build those muscles.

6.  When you lose weight you lose it everywhere.  No part of the body is excluded...even your feet,  my feet have seriously shrunk in size, and amazingly I have gotten a little shorter.  I am sure that is also because my feet have lost weight, as well as my head, but it was definately a shocker to notice it when I stood next to my children...they are all adults and I am about a full inch shorter than I have been for the last 20+ years. 

7.  Hormonal dumping...I am 42 years old and for about 3 months I thought I was begining menapause.  I am always cold but I started getting these intense hot flashes, where I was sweating and just flat nauseus for a couple of minutes out of the blue...then back to the normal being cold.  These spells got more and more frequent and finally I was told that it is basically excess hormones being stored in fat need to be dumped out of your system, thus the false menapause.  I realize now that it is false because for the last couple of weeks...nothing but cold.

8.  Just because one person has a symptom, issue, success, failure, ect... does not mean you will.  Every person is different, and although some things can be predicted in your weightloss journey, most things cannot.  Some people dump, others do not.  Some people get moody and others do not.  Ect...  Don't let people bring you down, be overly criticle, or even stick thier noses in where you don't want them.  Remember why you chose to have the surgery...it was not for vanity (although your will catch yourself looking in the mirror more frequently..it is just a perk to the real reason), it was not to make weight loss easy (because even though the weight comes off fast it is far from easy to change your entire lifestyle) ...  it was for you to feel better about your health, self and well being.  Don't lose site of that and all will be ok. 

9.  People think that by keeping it a secret it will keep people from asking questions...Wrong!   You are publicly going to lose weight very fast.  People are going to notice and ask!  If you tell them it is none of thier business...well they will come up with thier own reasons...they will think you are sick, dying, on drugs, anorexic, suffering from serious depression, ect...and if you are not careful...if they truly care they may want to start an intervention process out of concern for your health.  Because lets face it, no diet and exercise program out there will make you lose weight as fast as this surgery does. So the best solution is to tell the truth and deal with it.  You will get good and bad opinions that is ok...but be aware that there are negative nellies (people who will just keep comming at you negatively and destructively over and over) ...just tell them they are entitled to thier own opinions but they are not entitled to push them on you and frankly you don't want to hear it.  Surround yourself with the positive people and avoid the negative nellies.  I do caution you though, if a person has a concern and expresses that to you or simply does not agree that does not make them a negative nellie...it is when they become obsessive and overbearing, and emotionally abusive and destructive about it that I would consider them a negative nellie. 

10.  Number Ten and the biggie... It is ok to be shocked by your body, to learn about it, to learn it's physical and emotional limits, strengths, and weakness'.  Because the weight comes off so fast your adjustment is non-existent.  So try to take the time out to become reaquainted with yourself.  You will change both physically and emotionally many times over the next year.  Take some ME time at least once a week to go into the bathroom strip naked and look in the mirror.  Get a journal and put it and a pen next to your bed and another one on your desk, and write how your doing each day.  Good, bad or indifferent, tomorrow will be a new you.  Whether you are a man or a woman you will experiance physical changes and hormonal changes which cause emotional changes.  Realize that no major changes in relationships should be made until a minimum of a year after you have reached your goal (unless there is physical violence in the relationship...then get out now) and if you have plastic surgery...the time clock starts up again...1 year after you are healed from the surgery.  The reason is that when you go through a major emotionally life altering or physical altering change you and your partner have to adjust to the new you.  With weightloss you are changing so much that you cannot expect your partner to not have adjustment issues...you are, so it is common sense that they are as well.  If ongoing changes are still happening you have to let the dust settle before you can be sure ending or altering a relationship is for the best...that is why you need to wait a year after the dust settles before you consider relationship changes.  I have been fortunate so far that my relationship is stable and I never take it for granted...but I have seen my best friends sister totally drop off the deep end, she had the lap band and after reaching goal she had a breast augmentation shortly after that and a day apart from each other her mother died and her best friend committed suicide...3 months later she decided to give up her marriage, push off her kids (she has 5 of them) on her soon to be ex, and start acting like a 20 year old when she is 40.  Partying, hanging out with groups of men and women in their 20's.  She will look you in the face and tell you that she has no issues with her husband...he is a good man that would do anything for her, but she wanted to be free and she liked the attention she was getting from others, she has also ended her friendships with many people and her relationship with her sisters and other family members has become strained because of her odd behavior.  I tried to explain what I did above to her and she refuses to discuss it with me. She is not someone I have known for just a couple of years I have known her for about 25 years.  So when I tell you this I tell you from the heart...let the dust settle before you make a relationship change because you may regret it in the long run as I firmly believe she will.  She was always a responsible, loving, kind person who was committed to her husband and her children.  Now, I don't know who she is, but what I do know is that she is making decisions that when her dust settles may be devistating and will be life altering in themselves. 

I suggest you develop a routine to keep you anchored and steady.  Here is an example of my routine:

Every morning I get up, use the facilities, then I strip and get on the scale.  I view myself in the mirror and start my mind to thinking of how I feel about who I was yesterday, who I am today, and who do I want to be tomorrow.  As I start my shower I continue to build my daily expectations, make a mental list of what my thoughts, concerns, success', and failures are so that I can discuss them with my husband later that day, after he goes off to work, I take the time write my thoughts in my journal so I don't forget them. Throughout the day I jot down thoughts that I would like to discuss at some point with him...not always weightloss related, or even that important, but it keeps the lines of communication open.  Sometimes when we talk I tell him there are no changes from the previous day...sometimes there are major changes from the previous day...but I also make sure to ask him how he is doing, feeling, and dealing with things, because he is an important  part of our partnership and his thoughts, concerns, success' and failures matter also.   Every night from 8:30 pm to 9:00 pm the TV's/ Computers/ phones go off and we have US time to just talk.  Every Friday at 6:00 pm we balance our checkbook together and discuss finances.  Every other Saturday is Date night.  We do a lot of things that are not structured, and that is important, but life is so busy that if we don't put at least some of it on our schedule/Calendar and follow through with those schedules time flies by and months and years later you are asking yourself why is it that you don't talk to each other and your lives are so separate.

I suggest you come up with your own routine, but that is what we do to keep ourselves/myself anchored and the lines of positive and proactive communication open. 

So those are my top ten thoughts and ramblings for the begining of the year 2011.  Happy New Years to you, I hope these help you and I wish you a prosperous, happy, successful, healthy and fun year to come! 

- Jackie

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