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I'm still not sure who that person was or who I am now, but this is what keeps me motivated

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My 9 month anniversary is creeping up on Monday. It seems anymore that time is going so fast. Before I know it, its going to be February and I'll be going to my one year check up with my surgeon. Life has been nothing but a whirlwind since surgery. I've experience so much in such a short amount of time and I never thought I'd make it through it all. I've had my share of ups and downs and I've made it through them all! I am FINALLY starting to figure out who I really am. I was scared for a short amount of time that I would never really figure out who I was suppose to be. I was worried too much about what other people wanted me to be. I had to do some real soul searching to figure out who it was that I wanted to be. I still have a long road ahead to me but I have learned that who I was when I was "fat" is not who I really wanted to be inside or outside. It was who I was only because that's the situation I was in and was afraid to be the real me because of my appearance on the outside. Finally what I feel on the inside is showing on the outside. I'm happy to say that I am quite pleased on the progress I have made.

On another note I am also pleased on my weight loss. Its amazing that I am down 138 pounds so far and I have only 102 left to go. I went and purchased a pair of jeans a few weekends ago and I am in a size 20!!! I couldn't believe it. I can't even remember that last time I wore that size. I remember last year at this time I was in a size 30/32. Something else I am doing is running 2 miles a day and last year I was struggling just to walk a mile. I have a goal of running in a half marathon next summer. I believe I will be ready by then and can't wait to accomplish that huge milestone!!!  I love keeping track of all these before and after moments. These are the things that keep me going! I can't wait to see else the future holds for me!!!

134 pounds lost in 8 months!!!! 106 more to go!!!

It just seems like yesterday I had my RNY, but here its been 7 months for me and I can hardly believe the progress I've made and the weight I've lost. As of today I am down 126 pounds. Its unbelievable to look at old pictures of myself and believe that person was me, but its also hard to look in the mirror and recognize the new me. I know I still have 116 pounds to lose and I will look even more different, but I can hardly wrap my head around what I look like now. I've been on several roller coasters throughout the last 7 months but everyone of them have been worth it today.  I am so proud of what I have accomplished thus far. I never knew I had the strength in me. I have my great family and friends to thank for the great support. 

On another note I've become interested in a man who also had RNY about 3-4 weeks after I did.  He actually lives across the street from me.  We have spent time together and he is great. It nice to sit down and talk to someone who has experienced the same things as you.  Another thing that is awesome is that we have the doctor. We are going out again this Wednesday. I'm starting to get nervous that things are too good to be true, but I'm trying not to get worked up over it all and just let things happen. But for the time being its all great. I hope it all continues.  

Today is exactly 4 months since I had my RNY. I have officially lost 100 lbs. today!!! I am so excited and in complete disbelief about it. I never thought I would look or feel the way I do.  I have reached by first goal by losing the 100 lbs., but I gave myself until the end of 2011.  I still have 140 pounds to lose. Its time to move on and to my next goal of losing another 100.  Its by far not the easiest thing I have done, but it has made me into the new person I am today and has improved my outlook on life and my health. I just needed to share my success because I am quite excited about it. 

I had my 3 month appointment yesterday.  I was told I was doing great.  I've lost 93 pounds so far. I do feel great and can't wait to see what the next 3 months are like.  I can now have raw vegetable's and most fruits. I have to admit lately that eating has been some what of challenge for me.  It seems like everything I try and eat, it doesn't agree with my pouch. I am also finding that I get get full quicker then I did a month ago. It seems to be weird and I don't know why that would happen unless I am just now getting feeling back in the my new stomach. I've also been losing a lot of hair these last few weeks so the doctor said I could take bioten. My hairdresser also gave me some bosley hair treatment last time I was in for a trim.  Hope it all helps.  I don't have thick hair to begin with so loosing hair really isn't making me too happy right now

I never imagined I would make it to this point of having my RNY, but I did. I don't regret having the surgery but I sure didn't know it would like this. I know it will only get better. I am just not good with pain management and let me tell you I am in some pain. I also have to realize that I had a major surgery and this isn't something minor for my body. For the last two day I have been in OK shape and feeling some level of energy. Although I can't do much but walk and sit, it is really getting boring. Another thing that it getting to me is this drainage tube. Good thing that I get it taken out on 02/24/11. I guess all in all its been a rough 5 days. I can't wait for things to start looking up. I am so ready!!!

Well Monday is almost here which means my surgery date is getting closer. I can't believe it is here already. I just feel like not long ago I got approved and started my 8 week liquid diet. It really hasn't set in all the way but I know it will tomorrow for sure. So much to get ready for. I have to be at the hospital bright and early Monday....6 am. I will probably not sleep much tomorrow night because of the anxiety I know I will do fine. Its just an emotional rollarcoaster for me. I've been waiting for this moment for a long, long time. I've found the strength to make it this far...just a little further and I'll be there.

The new few weeks leading up to surgery are getting very busy and hectic. I have 19 days until surgery. I will be up at the hospital every week to have something done or for a class. It is beginning to wear me out. I am happy that it is getting closer. As the days pass by I get more and more nervous. I have been waiting so long for this and its almost my time! I need to start thinking of what I should take for my hospital stay. Anyone have any ideas?

This liquid diet is getting old. I thought for sure I would have settled into it by now. I've been on it since Dec. 19th. I have 25 days left. Its not the liquid part that I don't like. Its the not having an variety that is annoying. I just need to hold on for a little longer. I have lost 14 pounds since being on it. Thought it might be a little more since my calorie in take is about 1,500. Not complaining though! Its uplifting going into a store and seeing all the Valentines Day items. It just reminds me that my surgery is right around the corner. Yay!!! It's on Valentines Day!