Jody H.

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Once the surgery is done and the weight comes off,  the work doesn't end.

At my two year follow up the surgeon noted that I had crept up 10 pounds from my low - putting my net loss at 120 pounds.   He'd like to see me lose somewhere between 30-40 more pounds.   Since I know that I'm still struggling with some behavioral challenges he suggested I work with the psychologist.

There are a lot of good resources that offer up strategies for changing a life time of habits and emotional attachments around food.      Before seeing the psychologist - I had been working through those tools and I've changed a lot of my habits and put good things in place over the two years.    The one thing that was pretty clear to me was that there are times when I was deliberately choosing to self-medicate with food in moments of stress when the other stress relieving options weren't available or didn't work.     Counseling sessions have been affirming.      I can see that I am near or past the tipping point in making postiive behavior changes - but I also had to realize that  there are other chemical alternatives to medicating with food.  And while part of me feels weak for needing help dealing with life,  the part of me that wants to staty strong and healthy is willing to put pride aside and get the assistance I need.

Bottom line - use the tools that are available to get and stay helathy.

So,  how many months or years does it take to change a life time of bad habits and poor coping choices?   I don't know yet - I'll tell you when I get there.

Two Sundays in a row now I have lost control of my eating - two Sundays in a row I've experienced my pouch rejecting my choices and throwing them back at me.     I'm 48 and not stupid - you'd  think making the connection would prevent future bad behavior --- but there is that siren's call of years of comforting myself with food, calming myself with food, sending messages to myself that I DESERVE to binge , I've earned the right to be indulgent in that area... blah blah blah.

My stomach is angry that I'm not learning more quickly.    I'm 21 months out.    I don't do rice, rarely eat potatoes or bread.   But sweets - a little creeps up to a lot sometimes.    21 months out and I think my body has resorted to dumping now.   Last week it hit me in the middle of the night ... I thought it might have been a gall bladder attack - and perhaps it was - but after the pouch completely emptied - everything calmed.   Today  - definitely from eathing junk.

I would complain - but this - this is why I had the RNY instead of the band.     My pouch is reinforcing the messages my head is slow to learn - and who knows - in another 21 months the sugar tooth will hopefully go the way of the girl who liked fries, rice and bread and I'll be naturally making smart choices.

Jody

You'd think 17 months after surgery I'd have all of this mastered.   Not so.     It is so easy to slip back into old habits... to eat what I don't mean to eat,  to skip vitamins or exercise, etc. and think it doesn't matter.    It does matter. 

I need the support of the message boards.  I need to keep focusing on my habits.   I need to be aware and on guard.     I need to remember that I had YEARS of developing and cementing bad habits and choices.   It will likely take years to transition to the maintenance of a healthy lifestyle.    

Through it all - I so appreciate the tool that has allowed me to lose the weight and regain a life of movement and freedom.

Jody

I've passed the one year anniversary of my surgery.  The surgeon is pleased,  I'm pleased.  

I think it really has taken most of the year for me to not feel 'fragile' or 'vulnerable' because of having had WLS.   I finally feel confident that I understand the limits and strengths of the new me and my new normal.     That includes vitamins, water, exercise and protein first.    Still struggling with the "no snacking" rule - especially in times of stress... but life is good.  I'm pleased I had the surgery - and I'd encourage anyone to research it out and see if it makes sense for them.

Down 130 pounds.   Couldn't have done it without the tools.   OH is one of the best tools.

Jody

I am really enjoying Jazzercise class and evening walks around the lake.   The walks are calming - with my hubby and dog accompanying me as we traipse through the weeds on the path and listen to the birds while we catch up on the day.    The jazzercise classes though - the payoff is so visible with muscle toning and definition - I am just amazed.      I know the scale isn't moving and the inches are - so I have to give credit where credit is due.   Thank you Kate for bringing Jazzercise to my community.

I am still struggling with carb cravings.   I haven't quite gotten to the root of all of it --- some days I'm strong, some days I cave.    Hopefully as time passes I'll have more of the "I'm strong" days.      I am seeing that some of it comes from the desire to eat "easy" foods.   Fruits, vegetables and some proteins are just a lot of work to chew up --- so I instinctively shy away from those choices.   Gotta battle those instincts.    I'll get there.

It's also interesting how my body image keeps changing.    My eyes tell me I am thin/fat,  lovely/wrinkly,  small/large, lean/lumpy.       The truth  I'm sure lies somewhere in the middle.  

I've found some helpfful resources in the last couple of months -   One is a book "It ain't over til the thin lady sings" .    Working through it has turned on more than a few light bulbs of insight.     Another resource was the OH Conference in Chicago... I focused mostly on the sessions dealing with emotions  - but also learned new insights on cooking and a few surprising things about plastic surgery.     I've attended my local support groups - again - learned new things about acupuncture and massage therapy. 

Anyway - I think I know why my image of me keeps changing -  I keep changing - moving towards a healthier me.    It's  a good thing.

Jody

I had my 9 month check up a few weeks ago.   I've lost over 120 pounds since I started my journey.    I get compliments almost every day from friends and strangers.     My surgeon can't get over the change in appearance - and last week - I tried on a size 14 skort and it fit!     (Down from stretchy size 32 pants).

I get asked a lot if I feel  "good" or "better".   I hesitate before I respond.   My sleep apnea (and snoring) .. pretty much gone.   My iron and pottasium have leveled some - so that's better than it's been.      My lung capacity is better,  I walk faster, and can bend and twist and flex much more than I could before.     But this is a journey and I"m not done yet. 

I am still learning my portion sizes  and how fast I eat - because about once a week I have an "oh oh" moment where I've taken one bite too many and am feeling the pain.      I am still learning  how to deal with emotions, low energy, and hyper activity - all things I medicated with food before.        Sometimes that makes me more verbal,  more exhausted, and more impatient - and others still have to learn to deal with those new features in me.        I'm still working through books and exercises designed to help me with the emotional connections to food.

I'm still working on making the vitamins such an ingrained habit I won't forget or get behind.  I'm still  learning the habits of 64 oz + of water per day.    I'm still working on protein first and no snacking.     I'm still experiencing hormonal swings related to the loss of weight.

I am still learning to adjust to others responses to the newly sized me.     And I'm a little tired of all conversations being dominated with questions and comments from others on my weight loss journey...  

So - "Yes,  I am feeling better, but I still have work to do.  Now - let's talk about you - what's new in your life?" 

Jody


     

I've been more aware lately of how much work I still need to do in order to keep a handle on my eating habits.  

I don't dump - blessing and/or curse - but it also means that I am more vulnerable to unhealthy snacking.     it seems once the carb rush starts again - it's hard to put that monster back in the box.

I'm still working on getting a handle on portion sizes.   My pouch is doing it's job and being restrictive and making me uncomfortable  - but my head is having a hard time stopping before I get to that uncomfortable point. 

Someone asked on the boards this week how much we love our RNY and if we are happy now.   It was a good question.  I can only say I appreciate my RNY, and I don't regret it.   But neither do I love taking vitamins and pushing water, and the grouchiness of my pouch.   Nor did I have the surgery with the intention of changing my happiness level.     What I do love is the feeling of accomplishment that I get from seeing the pay-off of the surgery and the exercise and the efforts to change my eating habits.   I do love the lower blood pressure, and the increased stamina, and the muscle definition I am getting.

Blessings on  your journey!
Jody

It's not quite 6 months but close enough.   I got copies of my lab reports from the start (not this weeks yet) - so I can track my progress.   Noticed a lot of extra fatigue in the last few weeks - sure enough - iron is low.    I've been instructed to double it 4-5 days /week for the next 3 months.     

The pounds and inches have come off more rapidly since I started Jazzercize at the beginning of January.     It pushes me harder than I'd do on my own - and tones me better.   I've been doing two hours a week - but I hope to bump that up to three hours a week next week.

I continue to get lots of comments on my appearance.  The best giggle though was my 22 year old daughter pointing out one ear had deflated more than the other leaving more skin on one side.   Who would have guessed someone would notice the loss of ear fat!?!  

Mercy Center for Weight Reduction offers it's patients an educational series "Weapons for your toolbox".     A set of 6 rotating classes.    I went to my first one this week - not really expecting much.   The topic was shopping and reading labels.  I've learned to look at labels in a whole new light.     I'm posting my notes below - so I can find them later.  Maybe you can pick up a new tip too.   (Thank you Mercy! ) 


Shopping Tips:
·      Always make a list
·         Don’t go when hungry
·         Try to stay on the outside isles
·         Limit trips  
Warning:
·         Things on the end of the isles generally are not good for you.
·         80% of purchases tend to be impulse purchases
·         Highest profits are at the eye level
·         Rinse anything canned
·         Always dump juice from the canned.  

Reading labels:
·         Always read and understand the service size.   We must learn portions sizes.
·         The % are for a person on a 2000 day calorie diet – that’s not us.
·         Rating nutritional value:   (Start at the bottom up )
               o   Nutrients - there are usually 4 at the bottom of the label.   Give a point for anything with more than 10% of daily requirements
               o   Protein - Give a point for 5g or more 
               o   Dietary fiber – if 10% or more – give a point 
               o   Sodium – if over 300mg – take a point off o   Fat – if 10% or more – take a point off
               o   Calories – more than 200 calories per serving – take a point off
       Try to limit yourself to foods with at least 2 points.

I couldn't be more thrilled to be starting 2009 down 90 pounds from my high in 2008.     I am SO pleased.

The holidays have been challenging on many levels.     I still tend to throw up once a week or so - Christmas day the cheese and ham omelete sat for a couple of hours before returning.     I can eat cookies.   The good news is I am pickier about which ones I will eat... the bad news is I am still REALLY tempted,  and I don't dump.   I'm sure I've eaten far fewer this year than previous years - but I have to wonder how I'll do 2-3 years out.

I continue to be aware of how very much food is integrated into our social lives.     Eating out no longer thrills me -  the large portions, high price, and tendency to be sick afterwards have really toned down any anticipation.      Even parties don't hold the allure.

Bronchitis slowed me down on exercise during the holidays -as did the shortened day light and extreme cold/wet weather.   My greatest desire has been to hurry home and curl up into something warm.      But I'm finally feeling caught up on rest, and anxious to get  moving again.

I'm hoping to start on the weekly nutrition classes at the Weight Loss Center this month.     They have a series of 8 or so classes they encourage you to take at about this point in the journey.   I'm also going to commit tracking again on a regular basis.   At this point my focus will still be protein, water and vitamins.   Calories will come soon enough.    Sometimes I think I'm in the routine of meeting my goals - other times I suspect I might not be a diligent as I need to be.  Tracking will reveal the truth.

Here's wishing you success on your journey in 2009!     Jody