JJ2bskinny

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It's been SO long since I posted.............8 months........and I'm so far behind I can see my rear-end ahead of me.  Since my last post ages ago, I've gone backwards literally.  You see, I ended up getting too tight.........and then I was WAY too loose when I went for an unfill and I let that go for way too long and ended up gaining about 20 pounds back.  So, went back in for a fill oh who knows when and have been working my way back up to where I was before all the hullaballoo started.  Today I went for another fill after 4 months of losing and gaining the same 5 pounds hoping that this will jump start me back to losing.  I hate to change my weight chart but I am going to have to to be accurate and keep up with where I am and where I want to be so when you see the sharp spike know that I am making a NEW committment to get that thing back down.

Wish me luck!

I had another fill on Sept. 2nd and had to go have it taken back out on Sept 5th. So a month later, I decided to try it again. On Oct. 6th I had .6 cc's put back in. One week later I had lost 15.6 pounds, couldn't hardly drink anything, and could only eat 1/4 cup of food if I was lucky. I called my surgeon's office, ready to get some taken out. Thank God they talked me down, because even one day later and I feel so much better. I actually ate some real food for lunch and feel great. I just had to remember the basics, which I had forgotten and it was causing me to throw up.

Now I am only 3 pounds from being 1/2 way to my goal and I love my band again. Man, your head can really screw you up if you let it and I just about let mine do me in yesterday.

Ok, so I had a slight unfill 3 weeks ago because I was too tight.  Now I can eat anything and everything, and do.  I've gained 6 lbs back and so although I am scared to get another fill because of last time, the psych at our support meeting last night said GO GET ANOTHER FILL.  Obviously if I could control my eating behaviorally I would not have needed lap band surgery.  So I am waiting for my doc's office to get back w/ me and let me know when I can get in for another fill.  I don't want to gain anymore back!!!  I also bought a new pair of shoes last night and fully intend to start walking.  GOT TO START WALKING!!! 

Well, I really did it this time. I was too full, and all the reflux apparently could be the reason I ended up off work for 3 days with pneumonia. SO, I went in a had 4/10ths of a cc taken out. Talk about a huge difference!!! I went from not being able to drink anything much at all and not eating enough for a bird to being able to gulp liquids again and eat like I need to to feel human! I'm so glad I went back in for an unfill. I probably won't have the weight loss that I did last week, but I feel SO much better. Now if I can just get off my lazy rear and walk or something!!!!!

I had my 4th fill on July 28th and I am now at 6 cc's. In the last week I lost 6.4 lbs so I'm back on track. I FINALLY hit my 50 lb. weight loss mark!!!! I think I may be a bit too tight........coughing a lot at night and having some reflux issues. But I am keeping it the way it is for a while because I love the weight loss!!!! For the first time in many many years, I have fallen out of the Morbidly Obese catagory. Not out my much, but out is out!!!

Well I got fussed at when I went in for my check up. I knew I would. It's my own fault. Although I've lost 48 lbs. I could have lost more if I would exercise (yuck) and STOP EATING bad stuff!!!!! So, with a renewed determination this week I am getting back on the band wagon. I got up early the last two days and popped in my Leslie Sansone Walk DVD and walked a mile each morning. And I'm really trying to focus on what I eat and how much I eat. I scheduled myself for another fill for next week but I really don't know if I want to do it or not. I am going to see how this week goes first and then decide whether or not to keep the appointment.

Say a prayer with me that I can keep up my renewed dedication to getting this stupid weight off! It's a major feat to have gotten up at 4:45 am for the last 2 days so maybe I am really going to be able to pull this off. ha I know it's normal to have set backs like this but it's still making me mad at myself! I CAN DO THIS!!!!

More later.

I love my band!!!  Since my last fill 3 weeks ago I've lost 10.8 lbs. and have made the first goal I set for myself.  I wanted to be 250 or less before my 40th birthday and I am 245.8 today so I MADE IT!  My birthday is still another week and a half away so that will be that much more I lose before then!  WOOHOO!!!!  Now I have to think of another mini-goal to set!  I can really tell I have much more energy and just feel better overall, and it doesn't hurt that I've had to remove some clothes from my closet (to NEVER return) and replace them with smaller sizes!!  

Thank you God for making this surgery happen, for giving me the courage to go for it, for the support of my family, friends, and co-workers, for Dr. Luttrell's knowlege and skills, for BCBS PPO, and for all the other blessings in my life!

I am very happy today.  I had my 3rd fill yesterday and I can DEFINITELY tell a difference today as opposed to the last 2 fills (the day after I couldn't really tell a lot of difference).  I drank my liquid vitamins this morning and ALMOST had to let them come back up. I hiccuped drinking coffee this morning. And I could only down about 1/2 cup of soup at lunch.  I actually ate one more bite, and had to go get rid of it.  I am very excited!  THIS is what I've been after since I had surgery.  Some way to MAKE me stop over-eating!!  It worked today.  There is no way I could even think of putting something my mouth right now!  hee hee

I can't wait to see what the scales say next Monday.  For anyone reading this who has not felt good restriction yet, don't give up.  Keep getting small fills at a time until you reach the right place.  I truly hope this is my "sweet spot" and I can quit getting fills for a while!!

Wish me luck!

I am going in for my 3rd fill on Monday.  I have been doing better but I still can eat too much, although at the support meeting last night I found out I am still doing things wrong and that is to be expected because I am still so new at this.  I guess I thought this would be easier but like every one says, the band is a tool and if you don't use it properly it will not work properly.  SO, I am going to do better at using my tool the right way and we'll see what happens after my fill on Monday. 

I still am very impressed with Dr. Luttrell's staff, and Nancy Ryburn (the psychologist) was there last night and said some things that really made sense.  I just wish I could have her with me all the time to remind me of the things she said that makes so much sense. ha ha

That's all for now.

I just have to say that I am much more pleased w/ my band and myself now.  I got a fill last Monday and up until then I was not very happy w/ my weight loss.  I guess I was in Bandster Hell at that point.  But I do believe that this last fill put me nearer to my sweet spot because in one week I lost 7 pounds!!!!  WOOHOO!!!  The last time in my life that I weighed less than 260 was in 2003.....FIVE years ago!!!  I keep an excel chart on my computer that I started in 2001 (yeah, I'm weird) and the lowest weight EVER charted is 247.5 so I am only 12 pounds away from the lowest weight recorded for me in 8 years!!!! 

I love my band!!!!