I can see the light.....

Feb 02, 2011

at the end of this tunnel.  I see me at 150 pounds (lots of skin) but happy.  Things are coming together.  The pysch eval is done and the endoscopy is scheduled for Feb 11.  Approval from my insurance is also around the corner.  I have to be positive.  I know it will happen.  And if I can have it my way, I will have the surgery the week of March 20.  That is 6-7 weeks away.  I think about it and get really excited and scared and nervous all at the same time.  I listen to a song by Pink "Glitter in the Air" and the line that says "Have you ever looked fear in the face and said I just don't care?"  That is going to be my motto to get through surgery.

I know it's going to be a long haul.  I know that 90 percent of my success is on me and 10 percent is RNY (it is only a tool). I want to lose 20 pounds over the next 6 weeks and exercise (dance classes twice a week).  I want to walk fast, not get winded, wear something cute and run with my daughter - chase her down until she laughs so hard.

It will happen.  Now God give me the strength not to binge eat.  Nothing tastes as good as thin feels.  I don't even remember what thin is like but I will.

No more 300 pound girl.  Look out world.

JOJO

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