Dec 21, 2009
i am just waiting for a massage client to arrive and had a second to update. seems like time has been super fast flying. also know, i am someone else entirely. i hope all you pre-be's understand this, you have no way to know what will change, but know everything might. some its the marriage, others its friends, others get other addictions, i quit my job and changed everything i want out of life. when you cant eat, you have to deal...this has been really hard for me, if i could drink, i would but since i have migraines that is probably good so no addiction transfer. i made myself too busy, school, etc. i cut my own neck as i have no health insurance and yes, i havent had labs in a while. i will get back on it when money allows. i know its serious. the best i can do is to take really good care and take all my protein and suppliments which i have been. when hubby gets health insurance through his work, i will be seen. i dont think by srikanth though, i screwed that all up royally! I didnt know i would get to this place where i did put myself and wants and needs first (job), where i couldnt make myself go to the place of hell everyday, where i had to do something that forfilled me, that spoke or sung from my heart. at no matter the cost.
i am down really good on my weight, wondering where i am going to get the extra 30lbs to make goal, its barely there, on my belly only (thighs, boobs hang like heck but not much weight).
cant wait to be done with school and figure out how to make a living again. cant wait for holidays to pass, too much emphasis on food and money...gagging me a lil.
who am i now....well a hippie, have i always been? may be a long time ago. a giver, this is new for me. a healer (not truly but more someone who wants to help facilitate healing, its up to god, not me). a thinker, not new. a mistake maker, yes turns out i am actually human, i would have never suspected this one, i was so perfect before (well minus the food issues and surplus 100lbs). I am a friend who is lucky to have a few amazing friends! I am blessed to have God give and take care of me, via some very special people who do and his putting "luck" there.
I am brave, in ways i couldnt ever imagine. i am not horny, i think my mind is too busy and my body too tired, but its getting better. a role model...nah, skip that one! a good mother to my son, may have messed up with daughter but amazing with my son (not a news flash).
sexy...where did that come from??? where did it go when it wasnt here?
a smart ass...always!
hit me up!