1 year SURGIVERSARY!!!
Jan 25, 20091 year...WHAT A JOURNEY!
Pre Op Weight: 253lbs
Pre Op Size: 20/22
Pre Op BMI: 40
Pre Op Self Esteem/Confidence: ZERO
Current Weight: 149 lbs
Current Size: 7/8
Current BMI: 23
Current Self Esteem/Confidence: Through the roof!!
As I sit here reflecting back on the past year, I think about how far I have come. I was always tired, hungry, cranky, miserable, etc etc...Today, I am a whole new person! I have endless amounts of energy, I feel great about myself, I am always happy...and best of all, I am not always hungry!
The weight just seemed to fall off in the beginning...no matter what I ate! As I neared the end of my weight loss journey, the weight loss slowed and I actually had to work at getting it off. I have recently joined a gym...and I enjoy working out! I still have 4 pounds to goal but I have never been this small in my life...ok, maybe in middle school, but does that count?!?!
In October 2008, Dr. Bellanger wanted to use my before and after pictures in his seminars. WOW...ME...you want to use MY PICTURES?!?!? Then they asked if I wanted to speak at the seminars and let people hear my story straight from the source. I can't tell you how honored I felt! Being able to reach out to other people and have them relate to me was AMAZING! The night of my very first seminar, I didn't sleep.....I went home so exciting because I just felt so liberated! I could just look in the guests eyes and see that they understood what I felt because they were feeling the exact same things. The thought of possibly changing someone's life (whether or not to have the surgery) was the best feeling ever! Those seminars went great and with each one I did, I felt better about myself. Now that I am towards the end of my journey, I am not feeling so skinny anymore! I can look in the mirror and see my new self, but I don't always feel 'skinny'. Dr. Bellanger said that its because I am so used to seeing the BIG me in the mirror so its going to take some time to see the SMALL me in the mirror. It hits me when I walk past a glass storefront or see a good picture of myself...I sometimes look twice to make sure its me!
Last year, I quit my job as Office Manager for 6 1/2 years and went to work at an Electric Company. I was completely miserable at my job and for about a year, I thought it was me...because I was unhappy with myself. It took the weight loss to realize that it wasn't me, it was that job! With my newfound braveness and self confidence, I searched for a new job and ended up taking something temporary (to one day hopefully become permanent, but no guarantees). The old me would have NEVER taken that leap of faith! I realized though that it wasn't about the money, it was about being happy...no matter what! That job makes me happy and for now, its where I am and hopefully where I will stay.
Most often, when I run in to old friends, they tell me how great I look....how skinny I am....but what sticks the most is when they say how happy I look! I remember...once upon a time...when people used to tell me that I was always smiling. Over time and the many pounds that I packed on, those smiles went away. Well, they are back! I am always smiling because I have something to smile about..a great life, a great husband, a great family, great friends, and most of all...I LOVE ME!