Goals!

Jul 28, 2008

Well, when this journey started 16-months ago.  Man I can't believe it's actually been that long, time flies when your life is changing.  Anyway I listed some things I wanted to do now that I wouldn't be limping around and tired all the time.  Here are some I've accomplished:

1.  Buy clothes from Wal-Mart (I know you fashionistas out there will be like Wal-Mart, gurl you need to stop, but when you've only shopped at The Avenue, Lane Bryant, and through the Internet for the past xx years you always wish you could go into a store with regular sizes and pick-up something and wear it.  Did that!

2.  Get a new job that makes me happier.  Did that!

3.  Walk up the stairs without holding onto the rail.  Did that!

4.  Attend ballroom dance classes.  Signed up for ballroom dance classes today and I'll be taking my first class in 2 weeks.  Doing that!

5.  Ride on the amusement park rides.  Rode 2 this weekend and 1 several weeks ago.  I don't like the swings.  Did that!

6.  Cut down on daily snacks.  1 yoguart, 1 fruit, 1 100-calorie snack.  Sometimes hard to stick to but I've gotten better.  Work in progress but Did that!

I have other goals and dreams but for now I'm trying to keep positive and remember my goal of 100 lbs by my birthday.  I'm losing slowly but I'm losing and that's all that matters.  I hadn't updated in a while so I thought I'd drop some thoughts and put in writing what's giggling around in my head.

Blessed be....Justeace


Some MF's always got something to say....

May 06, 2008

Working hard trying to stay motivated in spirit, attitude and the physical and someone always has something to say.  I love my family but I wish sometimes I had never let them in on my surgery.  I didn't tell everyone but the few that I did tell I wish I hadn't told them sh*t.  Hell my friends are better at keeping their opinions to themselves.  But opinions are like a**holes everyone has one.  Like I've said before I know why Star Jones didn't tell anyone about her surgery because even the closet people to you need to stay the hell out of your business.  I don't make comments about their lives, weight or stupid mistakes why do they think they have the right to open their freaking mouths about mine.  Tonight I just wanted to tell someone extremely close to me to "Shut the fuck up!"

You know this is tough enough without having people around always butting in and no they don't have a right to but in.  This is my life and I'm doing damn good.  Not as fantastic as other people but damn good considering where I was before and I don't need someone making me feel bad with their stupid opinions.  Sometimes distance between the ones we love is really the best thing.

Blessed be....Justeace

Look Who's Back

Apr 14, 2008

Well, ladies and gents I'm back.  I always wondered why would someone go through all of the trouble to start a blog and not keep it up-to-date.  Well now I know.  You get busy and when everything that's happening is not a self-esteem boost you choose not to repeat it outside of the voices in your head.  But what good does that do.  So here goes.  I stalled big time.  My doctor had wanted me to lose more weight by my last check-up and I got discouraged when he said I should have done better.  So I said forget it!  I didn't pig out or anything but I haven't been working hard at all and wasn't getting any farther than 83 lbs.  But....this week I've changed that and started back at my gym.
I'm running, well ok jogging on the treadmill and I actually like it.  I like seeing my heartrate go up to the above level on the tracker and it's all in red.

Thank goodness spring has sprung because I couldn't take another cold day.  I bought a pair of rollerskates and I'm trying to get back into jumping rope.  I figure if I liked all these things when I was a kid and skinny as all get out why not pull out some old skool fun and burn off this fat.  I bike is also being eyed but I think I'll stick with the skating and jumping rope.  I really can't believe I'm running on a treadmill in the middle of the gym and rush hour.  I never would have done that before because I figured everyone was watching my fat a** and now I don't care.  It feels good so I run.

One last update, drum roll please.  I can now fit into jeans sold at Wal-Mart.  I'm actually going to buy jeans that cost $18.99 and feel great.  I'll have to take the waist in but they are black, stretch jeans and I can fit them.  I can see that finish line and I can't wait to meet the woman on the other side that has been waiting for me since I was 11.

Blessed be....Justeace

Keep Going and Change that Attitude....

Oct 07, 2007

Well I guess my title is also my theme.  Weight loss has been slow to say the least.  The entire month of September I think I lost maybe 2 lbs.  Literally nothing was happening.  I started to believe the weight loss was over and all my drastic steps had failed and so had I.  Well that was just old self pity creeping in.  Consistent exercise  has not been apart of my plan and I admit I eat way too many soft food (junk).  For some reason the junk doesn't bother me in small quantities.  My stomach has grown from an egg to a baseball.  I'm six-months out so it's easier to eat but I don't eat have the garbage I used to eat.  It takes me about two days to eat something from Boston Market like their chicken and two sides.  A couple of bites and then I'm done.

Upside is that I'm almost comfortably into a size 28, considering I use to wear a size 32 that's a huge improvement.  I'm still kinda bummed I haven't lost as much weight as other but maybe the bright side is because I'm losing slowly I won't have as much extra skin to remove , I hope.  Changing my attitude has helped me understand that the new job I have is something I need to get where I want to be.  "It's a means to an end to lead me to what I want."  I put up with college for years I can work two years until I have my next career goal achieved.  Other than that I'm doing well and loving life for once.  I still want a man!  Not need a man but I want men specifically to hang with, non-committal fun.  I've been a good girl long enough, I just want to be Angelina Jolie and get what I want and see you when I see you.  Don't call me because I probably won't call you kind of thing.    Yeah right now that sounds hot!

Well, that's all for now.  SoapNet is playing Days so I have to get back and word is Lucky will finally find out Jake is not his son on GH and I can't wait for that.  Go Liz and Jason, down with Lucky.  Ex-Druggie/Cop doesn't deserve any sympathy after two affairs and felonies that he should have went to jail for.  Yes I know it's a soap opera but hey at this point they are more exciting then my life so why not enjoy.

Blessed be and peace out...Justeace

Everything's New

Aug 07, 2007

Well I've lost 60 lbs. so far, not bad I suppose until I start comparing myself to others on this board then I'm like dang I need to step-up my game and lose a heck of a lot more.  So keeping that thought in mind I've decided to make goals for myself.  Since I've lost 60 lbs. in 5 months I'd like to keep that going, 12 lbs. a month and 60 lbs. every 5-months.  So by September 1, 2007 I should be down another 12 lbs., hopefully more, since I finally started exercising regularly.  3 to 5 days a week of walking, tennis, weights anything to keep myself moving.

The new job is....well a new job.  It fit all the things I was looking for but I forgot to mention in my pray an industry that really interests me.  Well you can't have everything so I'm going to do it above my ability and keep my eyes out for opportunity because you never know when she's going to knock.

Wow moment....I not only fit in the seats at the movie theater I actually have room leftover.  The knee pain has decreased significantly.  I still walk up the stairs slowly but I walk up and down them using both legs instead of one.

Oh and movie reviews, The Bourne Ultimatium is visually amazing and once you leave the theater you want to go out and join a secret covert government agency with more ethical ambition but still it's the thought running through your head.  The Bratz avoid this garbarage as much as possible unless you have a little princess in your family that just has to go see it then grin and bare it.  Coming soon American Gangster with the one and only Denzel Washington.  I saw the previews at The Bourne Ultimatium and man that looks good, can't wait to see it.

Well that's all for now so Blessed be....Justeace

Change is gonna come

Jun 10, 2007

Changes, changes, changes....that is definately the motto for my life at this moment.  I recently accepted a new job offer that will have me traveling and blazing a path for all others that come after.  I'm taking a brand new position that was just created so everything I do or don't do is what the next person will have to review after me.  It's exciting and scary.  It's a completely new experience for me but so was surgery so I'll get use to it like everything else and if not then I'll move on again to something else.

I'm also buying a new house and selling my current one.  The market isn't as good as it was a couple of years ago but we've done so many upgrades to our house it shouldn't take long to sell it.

Weightloss is going well.  Not as fast as I wish it would come off but everyone is always impatient about weightloss.  So far I've lost 46 lbs. and counting.  I've really got a pretty good handle on eating and I've just normally given up things that I think will cause me to get sick and I don't even miss them.  It's true you do something for 3 weeks and it becomes a habit.  I haven't had steak, bread, hamburger, corn, pork, pasta or rice since February 2007 and even though I might think about them once in a while it's not like I'm craving them anymore.  My hunger hasn't returned, I mean I eat but I'm never hungry anymore.  The funnies thing is that my stomach (right-side) makes all kinds of noise now.  I don't really care but it's going to be funny when someone else hears.  I just ignore it but others will definately be like that girl needs to eat something.  LOL!

I'm not good with change, I like things to stay that way they are and I'll fight change tooth and nail but eventually I get over it and accept the new reality.  I guess I was right 2007 is going to be a much different year than I have had in a very long time.

Blessed be....Justeace

Week 11

May 21, 2007

Well 41 lbs. down and way too many to go.  I have 9 lbs. to go to make my 3-month goal but I still have a week and 1/2 to go so if I put the protein train into effect along with a 30 minute cardio and 20 minute weightlifting schedule for the next week and a 1/2 I just might make it.

Went back to work May 1st, I should have stayed home.  I obviously forgot how annoying and expensive it is to drive to work everyday.  Other than that there are some new prospects on the horizon, job wise.  Hopefully by the beginning of June I'll have moved onto to the next level in my career and will seriously be contemplating going for my MBA/JD.  There is this amazing program at my alma matar where you can get your MBA and JD at the same time.  I would love to have both.  Not that I want to be a lawyer but knowing the ins and outs of the law can't ever hurt.

Other than that I thank God for the weight I have lost and the weight I plan to lose.  I thank him/her for my health and so far complication free recovery.

Blessed be to all....Justeace

Week 7 & day 7 (74 days)

Apr 25, 2007

I'm learning how to eat all over again and I tell you it was definately easier the first time around.  I've gotten over my bout of depression now I only get angry or depressed when I over eat and get sick.  I learned from my PRN that my spitting up that was occurring a lot was from over eating.  It's hard to learn exactly how much to eat when your so use to shoveling food in your mouth without thinking.  I actually have to eat less than 1/4 of a cup over a 30-40 min time period and I don't get sick or feel bad at all.  That was enough for me to do that forever.  No overeating for me because it just feels so uncomfortable when you overeat and all you can do is make yourself throw-up to feel better.

Bree, my pouch/stomach, and I are learning to get along and I've lost weight so that makes me feel better.  It's been nice outside so feeling the sun has made all of this much more bearable.  It's time for new beginnings with my weightloss has come not so much a realization but a revelation that it's time to move on in all aspects of my life.  I've been standing still instead of living and that's not acceptable.  With some hardwork and determination next month will be a time of dramatic change and growth.

Until then....Blessed be, Justeace.

3/29/07 - Grits don't like me

Mar 29, 2007

I've determined that grits don't like me anymore.  Too bad because I did like them before.  I didn't eat them all the time but every now and then they were wonderful to eat.  Well after the naseau I felt after eating them and the PA saying that they probably expanded too much in my stomach and that's where the pain came from I decided that I won't be messing with them anymore.

Feeling good today.  The sadness that I was feeling because I couldn't eat anything has finally subsided and I finally feel ok about the fact I'll be able to eat more real foods on Sunday.  I haven't had that pain in my chest in a couple of days and I ate eggs, tunafish salad and chicken without feeling nauseous or sick today.  The sunshine outside has really helped more than I ever thought it could.  I still wish I was in Disney but CT's not that bad right now.  I have to work on getting in my execising in every single day and not just every now and then.  The first 6-months are the most critical for me to lose weight after the surgery and I'm working on losing 100lbs. by my 4-month anniversary.  That's my first major goal.  I have a lot of weight to lose and want to do it as quickly as possible so I can go from flab to fab in record time.

Blessed be....Justeace


3/26/07

Mar 26, 2007

5/21/07 - 333
3/26/07 - 350
3/19/07 - 355
3/01/07 - 367.9
02/19/07 - 374.3

Blessed be....Justeace

About Me
Meriden, CT
Location
48.8
BMI
RNY
Surgery
03/01/2007
Surgery Date
Dec 19, 2006
Member Since

Friends 43

Latest Blog 20
Goals!
Some MF's always got something to say....
Look Who's Back
Keep Going and Change that Attitude....
Everything's New
Change is gonna come
Week 11
Week 7 & day 7 (74 days)
3/29/07 - Grits don't like me
3/26/07

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