May 2014

I am a 40+ year old male living in Boise, Idaho and have been lurking on this site for over a year. I have struggled with my weight my whole life. I have been approved for surgery two times and was going to do lap band in 2006. Looking back I am so glad I didn't do lap band as many people are having problems. Back in the day that was the surgery being pushed for weight loss. I hope that in 10 years we will not discover people should not have had 85% of their stomach removed. I am looking at VSG in a month. I am up to 385 pounds (395 on the doctors scale) and am 6' tall. I hope to loose around 200 pounds and keep it off forever. I am so ready to get my life back. The past two years I have gone up 100 pounds and don't do many things I once enjoyed.  In addition, there are friends I no longer visit as I am ashamed of my weight. It is sad to always be the heaviest person in the room where ever I go. Heck, I don't even mow my own lawn these days.  I just want to live a healthy life and do the activities again that I once enjoyed.  

August 2, 2014

Well, in just a few days I will have surgery.  I am a bit nervous, but not too bad.  I started the liquid diet today and have done good all day.  It is hard to stare at all the left over pizza and cheese cake left over from my kiddos birthday yesterday. I also miss all the cereal that is in the pantry.  I am a cereal person and used to eat a box in just a few days. Those days are over and the days of polishing off several gallons of 2% milk a week.  

August 7, 2014 (Thursday)

Where do I begin.... First of all it is 3am and I am on the losers bench and awake for the day. It has been a crazy journey so far.  I made it to surgery after being awake the day of surgery at 1am due to so much fear, anxiety, and dry heaves.  The surgery went well and I woke up with VERY little pain and NO gas discomfort or nausea.  I was moved to my room after being in recovery and watched tv and returned emails. After several hours I was up walking laps around the nurses station.  This is crazy, I  still have very little pain and no nausea. The fun part came last night at 8pm as I still had not gone pee for the day and my surgeon doesn't do catheters during surgery. I had to pee really bad and tried, but my system was still asleep from surgery. So they had to do a catheter to empty my very over full bladder. It took them three tries and three different nurses to get the darn thing to work. I was given a shot to help calm me as it took so many tries and each time they kept fishing around trying to get it in far enough and in the right spot.  Also sleep around here is non existent.  My resting heart rate continues to stay low and so every 5-10 minutes the heart monitor beeps 3 times. So, to sleep with beeps every 5-10 minutes is impossible so here I lay at 3am.  But hey I had surgery and am alive after backing out 2 times before due to fear and almost walking out after I was being prepared for surgery this time. Today I have my leak test and start drinking fluids. I went for 5 walks yesterday and am told I will do more today. I feel I am ahead of the game as they said a lot of people are not feeling so good the first day and doing so many long walks.  

I just want to give a big shout out to all the people on this site and all my friends for your positive words and encouragement.  I went back and read all the positive things people wrote to me over the past several months and it helped a lot when it was 2am and I was ready to cancel my cab ride to the hospital.  

I just had the leak test and all looked good. I guess there was an issue with the staple gun during surgery so the doc had to over sew an area.  But so far no leak and all is good.😀

The leak test really was not too bad.  The stuff they give you to drink tasted bad but not too horrible.  I only had to take three swallows of the nasty stuff and then have an X-Ray of my stomach area while standing up.   

Thank God for farts and pee.  I was finally able to pee today and passed some gas.  Looks like they can put the catheter away today.  

I began drinking today about 2pm.  They said to drink a cup every half hour but I was able to drink more.  I have no pain drinking and the broth tastes so good. I called it quits at 9pm and went to sleep.  I lost the heart monitor so I could actually sleep without beeps all night. I also was taken off the IV pain Meds before bed. I really have no pain unless I try to stand up and even then the pain is not that bad.  

August 8,2014 (Friday)

It is now 3am and I am wide awake. Instead of letting the sleeping giant sleep they decided to wake him at 2am to have him pee. I am the kind of person once awake I am awake for the day.  So my day has started at 2am just because a RN wanted some pee.  I am drinking broth and watching Family Guy. It is day 2 of drinking liquids and things seem to be going down Okay.  No real pain issues today unless I try to get out of bed.  They are going to send me home with liquid pain Meds in case I need some relief.  

Poke me in the eye with a sharp stick. They got me up at 2am to pee. I have been unable to pee today and last took a pee yesterday at 12 noon.  So it is now 7am and they had to use a catheter again. I tried many times to pee, but I just can't get it out under pressure and pee in a strange place.  It is like when you go to the doc and know you have to do a UA and show up prepared, but then can't pee when you go into the bathroom.  So I guess I stay another day or they send me he with a catheter...stay tuned.  

0945 I woke from a nap and had to pee like a race horse.  Holly cow I was able to pee on my own with no problems.  

10am I took the best shower of my life. It felt good to get out of bed and play in the warm water.  Looks like I will be sent home as the doc thinks I am under too much stress to pee and will do fine at home.  Just more of the same today... Sip and walk and then repeat.   

11:25am. I was able to pee again.  So it looks like I will be able to go home with some medication to aid in peeing and liquid pain medication.  The pain is gone for the most part. I got off the pain IV last night and had a small liquid dose of pain medication earlier today.  It only really hurts to get up from the bed. 

3pm I made a stop at the hospital pharmacy and was sent home.

8pm I am able to get around the house okay.  I have been drinking and walking in the house and down the sidewalk.  

8:30pm I am going to bed as it has been such a long day.  I still have pain when I stand up after being on the couch but the pain is not too horrible. 

August 9,2014 (Saturday)

All seems to be well today 3 days after surgery.  I have taken NO pain medications today. The only time I have pain is after I get up off the couch to walk. It is 1pm and I already have my 64 ounces of fluid in for the day. But I was also awake at 3am today as I went to bed so early last night.  I have been out walking up and down the street today. 

  I am 7 days out and have been doing great. I am able to drink way more than 64 oz and life has been good. Today my bladder decided to go to sleep again. As a result I decided I better go to the ER. I sat around for hours not being able to drain the main vein so they gave me a little help. Boy do I feel better. I don't think I could have waited any longer. By the time they decided to drain me I was in pain. I will be going home with a catheter later this morning.

My worst nightmare has come true with having surgery (catheters). I must say that today it was not too bad.  One try and it was done. While in the hospital however I had three female nurses who took turns and couldn't get the darn thing to work. Three people and three tries trying to get a tube shoved inside me almost killed me..... Dang that hospital staff. 

I am also going to get fluids as they said I am dehydrated. That is strange as I drink all day and feel pretty darn good. I feel a little funny when I walk around but am told that it is due to the medication.  

August 15,2014

I went to the surgeon today and the P.A sent me home with "the bag" after the doc said I would loose the catheter. After the appointment I went to the store. By the time I got home I was worn out and had not drank enough and the bag was dry. I went back to the ER as I felt I was not draining and felt like I needed to pee.  They cleaned out the catheter and did some tests and now I have an infection.  They also gave me a bag of fluids again as they said I was dehydrated.  It was good I went to the ER so I could get Meds for the infection.  The good news today is that the doc took me off my blood pressure medications.  My blood pressure at the doctors office was really low. But at the hospital it wasn't too low but in the normal range.  I am also down 22 pounds since surgery but that is no shock as I have been on liquids 12 days.

 

August 18,2014

It has been more of the same the past few days. I just sit around on the couch with the catheter bag. Yesterday I almost went to the ER again as I felt like crap. I had a little fever but not over 100. At 9pm the ER called and said based on my test results I should be on a different antibiotic than what they gave me. So I picked it up this morning and started taking it. I was able to get out today as I feel so much better than yesterday. 

This is morning I drank my protein shake too fast and got a tightness in my chest.  After about 10 minutes some of it came up. I need to learn to slow down when I eat and drink.  Liquids have been going down fine until today.... Lesson learned slow down.  

August 20,2014

I went to a urologist the other day. The plan is to take out the catheter tomorrow morning. I have not been walking much due to this bag I have to carry around. I am able to get in all my fluids and am still on full liquids. I have been having tomato soup after I blend it and it tastes so darn good.  Other than the bladder issue I have been doing great. I feel much better so the  antibiotic must be kicking the infection out of my body.  My incisions look great and there is hardly a scar at all. When my man bear hair grows back no one will be able to see that I had surgery. 

August 21,2014

The catheter came out today after 9 days.  I really feel human again. I will not into detail what a catheter was like, but will say at times I thought I was going to die from the stinging at times.  Also, the pain going in and coming out is enough to kill a person. Things have started to "flow" again today so hopefully we are good. I am still on full liquids and found out today I was taking in too many calories. I was supposed to do only 4oz of milk with protein powder and I was doing 10-12 oz as that much was able to go down and I thought the idea was lots of liquids.  Needless to say I will now cut back to four ounce shakes and more water and other fluids.

September 1, 2014

I have been doing good the past couple weeks. I am now on soft foods and eat things like lite cheese, tuna, turkey, and refried beans. I eat slowly, but it still feels funny in my chest and stomach. When I think I am full I stop eating. It is crazy that I can only eat about 1/4 cup of food. I still don't feel that great after moving around a lot I.E. Shopping for food.  

September 10,2014

Things have been up and down the past two weeks. I have been in the ER a couple more times. The ER Doc found I had a urinary infection and I started taking antibiotics. I was then tested at the urologist and he said I was "clean".  Then a week later I was back in the ER due to urinary issues and they sent a test to the lab and it came back positive for some sort of bacteria in my urine. So I am on a different antibiotic for 10 days.  

I am still on the soft diet and have thrown up a few times. I think I eat too fast sometimes. I did find for some reason cottage cheese makes me sick. After the first bite I feel sick. This is crazy as before surgery I at at least 4 pounds a week and sometimes more.  I don't think I have become lactose intolerant as I can drink milk.  This week I have felt pretty good and have had no issues. I hope to be back to work next week. I am not sure my body will ever be the same. I really do not feel the urge to pee like I did before surgery. I just kind of watch the clock and go to the restroom every couple hours. 

November 23,2014

I am now at 300 pounds and can't wait to see a number that starts with a 2. The other day I went to a local Christmas show. I wanted to sit in one of the arena chairs to see how I fit. I sat in one of the chairs andactually fit without any trouble and got up without being stuck. So I can now actually go to a show or concert and not feel smashed in the seat and uncomfortable. Things have been going good for the most part. I am still not doing so hot in certain areas. I am at about 50 oz a day on drinking water. I just feel so full if I get more than that and it is hard that you can't drink around meal times. I actually eat more snacks rather than a meal. I just don't eat that much and things like chicken and ground beef are hard to eat and I often puke them up. I sometimes forget I can't eat fast and then my body reminds me to slow down when eating. I still need to get more exercise as I have been busy at work and don't work out much.  I am still having urinary issues and have been to several doctors.  I go great for weeks then bam I have a day where I strugle to pee. The whole thing is frustrating and hope to some day be back to normal. I feel that the trips to the ER and many catheters I had have damaged my body some how. Before surgery I had no urinary issues at all. It seems that things are always changing. Weeks ago I got up once to use the restroom and now I get up a couple times and pee every 2-3 hours. Before surgery I could go all night for 8-9 hours and not get up to pee. I am still taking the Flowmax so maybe that is why I pee so much and can't hold pee more than a few hours. 

November 27,2014 Thanksgiving

I finally have a number that starts with a 2 on the scale.  I am down to 296.4 today. 

January 2015

I am down to 272 and have lost over 100 pounds in 5 months.  I feel great, but don't eat or drink enough.  I mostly live off cheese and yogurt.  I am NEVER hungry and food is such a turn off at this time.  I eat other things like a beef patty from McDonalds at times to get more protein.  It is so hard when the sight and smell of food make you feel sick.  I can sit and watch other people eat all my old favorite foods and it just turns my stomach.  I have tried chicken many times and it gets stuck and comes up after a half hour.  So far, I have lost over 100 pounds in 5 months without doing ANY exercise.  I am now afraid to exercise as I don't want to loose at a faster rate.  I worry that at some point I will be at my goal weight and not be able to stop loosing weight.  I need to start eating more so that I can stop loosing at some point.

I still have urinary problems from time to time, but am about 90% back to normal.  I am still talking Flowmax and need to stop taking it at some point, but am afraid to as I still have memories of the ER and catheters. I hope to stop taking the Flowmax in the next month after taking it every other day for a few weeks.  I had my three month labs and everything looked good.  

February 24,2015

I am down to 257 and still loosing. I sometimes eat chips or candy but continue to loose weight.  I really get NO exercise other than what I do in my day to day life and my job that is not overly active, but not a total desk job.  It is great that I am unable to eat a whole bag of chips or entire package of cookies like I was able to do prior to surgery.  I still am not hungry and have to force myself to eat most days. I am short on my daily protein and only get about 48 oz of water per day.   My diet is mostly cheese and yogurt with a McDonalds patty from time to time. I feel great and it is so much easier to purchase clothes.  I used to wear a 4XL shirt and now most of my stuff is 2XL and starting to look a little big on me.  I can get up from the couch and not be out of breath.  I can also climb stars without any trouble.  And best of all, I am able to wipe my ass without having to do a contortion act and am able to reach around and clean my ass in the shower without any trouble at all.  Being 395 pounds made it hard to clean certain areas.  

March 4, 2015

This morning my 12 year old son gave me a hug and made the comment that he was able to wrap his arms all the way around my body.  

March 9,2015

I need to kick it in gear and stop the poor eating.  The past few day and last week I have had a lot of chips, and other junk that I should not be eating.  It is crazy how easy things like chips and crackers go down and how much you can eat.  I still want to loose another 55-60 pounds so I need to get  back on track.  I have not been gaining any weight, but am on a slippery slope eating junk food.  Now that the weather is warmer outside I will begin doing projects outside and being more active. This year I can actually mow the lawn again. I was so fat the past two years that I was unable to mow the lawn and had the neighbor kid mow the lawn. Being 395 it is hard to  push a mower around the yard.  Heck, was unable to climb a flight of stairs without being out of breath and sweating like a dog, so mowing the yard would have killed me.  

March 28,2015

What the heck am I doing.  I am not in maintiance yet I still have 50-60 pounds to go.  The past few weeks, I have been going back to old habits and eating things like chips and cereal.  I am not going up in weight, but have not been going down.  I really need to get back on track and stop eating things like 16 oz of cream soups, chips and candy.  I get dressed and feel good about my weight and how much I have lost.  I am wearing much smaller clothes and can get dressed without being out of breath.  But the truth is I am still FAT and want to lose more.   So, starting today it is back to the basics and eating to live not living to eat.  I need to get back on track before I lose total control of my eating habits.

 April 26, 2015

I was back in the ER the other day as I was unable to urinate.  I had been having a hard time urinating for a couple weeks, but always able to pee. In addition, my bladder hurts most all the time.  A couple days ago I woke up and my head was pounding and I hurt all over my whole body.  I was able to get through the day at work.  In the evening I was unable to pee and went to the ER.  I was sent home with yet another catheter.  I go back to the Urologist in a couple days for testing.  This has been a crazy ride and no one knows what to do about my problem.  The surgeons PA has no idea what is wrong and claims it is not due to the surgery.  The Urologist just talks with me and thinks that things will get better the longer I post op.  I even went to another Urologist who said that it is just my body changing as I have lost 150 pounds and that I just need to be patient.  What the heck, I had surgery almost 8 months ago and now have a catheter again due to urinary issues.  Something is going on in my body and it needs to be figured out as I can't live my life like a roller coaster and not knowing if I will be able to urinate.  Heck, I am afraid to leave town as I should be near a hospital in case I start having issues and need a catheter.  My life is absolutely miserable right now and SUCKS!!!!

July 19, 2015

I have not had any urinary issues for a long time now.  In fact, I quit taking the urinary medicine about a week ago.  I started off taking it every other day and then quit taking it all together.  So far, I have not had any urinary issues at all.  I really need to get my eating back in check.  On July 4th, I was down to 244, but today am at 250.  I still want to be around 200 pounds or my ultimate goal of 180.  I don't eat the right foods and seem to be eating small amounts all day long.  

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Feb 26, 2013
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