Kariann404

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

 Wow, so it's been forever since I've been on here!  I'm almost 2 years out now!  Gosh I still can't believe how fast the time has flown by!  So I'm about 135- 140 now guess I put on a few lbs :/ ugh sucks saying that!  My mom swears I look better now though.. typical mom ;) I'm currently finishing up school, I'm in a medical assisting program, just started my externship at a general surgeons office, one that just so happen to specialize in bariatric surgery!  I didn't even plan on that happening it just sorta did. Check out Dr Jeffrey Johnsrud, he's amazing! Anyways I'm having a lot of fun with that, I love being able to relate to the patients!  They can't believe I've had gastric bypass, so much fun telling them about how far I've come!  And it's nice to be able to get a doctors advice all the time ;)  So I'm currently experiencing a ton of nausea and vomiting, two years out and this is really my first time having any probs... I did battle some anemia though, but then again I've been anemic forever.. nothing a little iron transfusion couldn't fix.  I will be going to see a hematologist next week though.  So  my surgeon wants me to get an upper GI and a CAT scan, just need to work out the details for that, hopefully we'll get to the bottom of this horrible nausea! Ummmm.... So just got back from another trip to Hawaii, so much fun!!  Love hanging out with my sis (and sharing her clothes ;) Just celebrated 5 months with the most amazing boyfriend ever :)  Pretty sure he's "the one" :)  I've waited a long time for someone as amazing as him!  He's an elementary school teacher and he is amazing with my son and treats me like a total princess :)  We're actually talking about moving to Hawaii..but we'll see...

So I will be officially one year out on June 16th!  I can't believe how fast the year has gone by!  I can't believe how much living I've done in the past 12 months.. for years I felt like my life was on hold.. It's crazy though.. I think the newness is wearing off, I was so unbelievably excited when I started this journey and now I think I'm done losing and I'm just here.. stuck in the same spot, wondering why people treat me better, yet still not at ease with myself.  I thought I had issues with myself because of my weight but I am now realizing it goes much deeper then that.  I don't know what I need, I'm hoping I find it soon though.  I don't know why I'm so unhappy with myself.  Wow this one is pretty personal.. I wonder if people actually read these.. So I had a wow moment yesterday.. I was at Gap and tried on some size 2 jeans, they fit but were a little loose in the waist so I thought I would humor myself and try on a size 0.. I actually got them buttoned! wtf?!  I went from a size 20 last year to a size 0??  I've done the impossible... but now what?! Ugh I dunno what's wrong with me :(

 So I'm 9 months out and 123 lbs down!  I'm officially 130 lbs, I thought I was done losing but I got on the scale yesterday and 3 more lbs were gone and that's including the weight of my NEW IMPLANTS :) yes I got my boobs done on March 12th and couldn't be happier :)  Ah I'm on top of the world!!  I booked tickets for me and my son to go to Hawaii next month and I can't wait!!  I bought a bathing suit, which I thought I would never do and now I'm sooo lookin forward to just layin out on the beach :) We went last year and I wore jeans and long sleeves 90% of the time, it was horrible!  I'm so ready for summer, and shorts and just hangin out at the beach. My poor son has been deprived of the beach cuz i was so heavy and unhappy, oh well, I'll make up for it this year :)

 So in 10 days I will be 8 months out!  I am down 117 lbs!  I hopped on the scale today and I weighed 136, that was my old high school graduation weight, the lowest I have ever been!  I'm looking forward to losing even a little more ;)  It's the weirdest thing, lately I've had a lot of people come up to me and tell me I've lost too much, how much more am I planning on losing, I'm wasting away, when will I stop.... it's crazy!!  I don't think anyone has ever told me I was too small!  I don't even know how to answer that.  I usually say "well my sister weighs 113 so I can still afford to lose more" but people are telling me I looked better with a little more meat on my bones.  I just don't see it, I don't think I could ever be too skinny!  But I am kinda wondering when the losing will stop.  On a good note, I FINALLY got my health insurance back!!  I'm so excited!!  I haven't been to the dr since my first post surgery appt at the end of June, so it is much over due!  Can't wait to see my doctor and surgeon though, boy will they be surprised :)  So although I feel absolutely amazing in my new body, I am missing something.... boobs :(  I went today for a consultation, I'm looking into a lift and implants, I went from a 42DD at Lane Bryant to a 34 A at Victoria Secret.  You can only imagine how horrible they look!  They definitely don't look like they belong on a 25 yr old body .  So hopefully I will be getting that done soon and I know that will make me feel a million times better!  It's weird I never thought big boobs were a big deal, guess I always kinda took it for granted but now that I don't have any I feel so self conscious I seriously feel like a man sometimes, like I've lost all my curves, I cut my hair short and I have no freakin boobs :( Ok I'm done ranting lol 

 So I'm now 6 months out and down 110 lbs!!  I currently weigh 143lbs!  I'm pretty stoked about that!!  I'm still hoping to lose more though.  I've been hitting the gym pretty hard these days and can see the change in my body and the way my clothes fit but it seems to be slowing down the scale.. oh well!  I wear a size 4 in levi's now!  Down from a size 20!  I look at old pics and can't believe how much my life has changed in just 6 short months.  It's weird to think last December I was just starting this journey, so glad I've come this far!!

 So I finally did it!!!  As soon as I said I stopped losing weight I magically started losing again!  I am now down 104lbs!! I hit my goal of 150 and than surpassed it!  I think I want to lose another 15-20 lbs but we'll see :)  I feel amazing :)

And it says my BMI is normal!!  woohoo :)

 So I'm 5 months out and apparently, after reading my post from last month, I'm only down 1 more lb :( lol I've kinda been up and down this month, don't really know why, I've been busting my butt in the gym like crazy!!  Oh well, I can tell in my clothes, I bought a pair of size 4 Levi's today WTH I am convinced their sizes must be screwed up!!  There is no way I fit in a size 4, it's the weirdest thing, but I shouldn't complain :)

 4 months out and couldn't be happier!!  I'm down 96 lbs, 74 since surgery!!  I'm down to 157, 7lbs away from my goal, I have a feeling I will pass it soon though :) I fit in a size 8 now and even those are getting big!  I don't know what I'll do when I buy a 6!  I just can't even imagine, I told myself I'd be happy at 12!  I chopped off my hair yesterday!!  It was my security blanket, it was the one thing I always got compliments on even when i was big, I was so afraid to do it but I did and I couldn't be happier, I feel like it's a whole new me :)

 from weighing what it says I weigh on my license!!  :) So stoked!!

 So I went through all my old clothes yesterday and wow it was crazy!  I was looking for old clothes that I thought might fit again but to my surprise I actually didn't find much!  Things I thought would fit now were too big, way too big!  I also tried on my old fat jeans, a size 20 pair of gap jeans, they were the biggest I owned, they were never really tight, but still a size 20!  And they were falling off, I actually had to hold them up!  I put them on and hollered for my mom to come look then I went and looked in the mirror and I couldn't help but start crying.  I'm actually crying as I right this!  I just can't believe I ever let myself get to that point :( I'm so glad I had the surgery and so glad I'm getting my life back on track!!