karlaanne

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

I got up around 8am the day of surgery (10/01/08) and mom and my boyfriend, Gigi, and I headed out to UNC hospital for my 10:15 surgery. After registration, we were sent into the holding tank where my surgeon came to give me a chat and write on my belly, and my anesthesiologist came in to ask me a million questions. I had fully expected this to be the point of my highest anxiety and the biggest freak-outs, but for some reason I was totally calm. I was so ready to just… get it all over with at this point, especially with having the IVF and tri-lumen catheter sticking out of my neck. I gave my mom and Gigi multiple kisses and suddenly I was pumped full of the Versed and whisked away. I don’t even remember leaving the holding tank.

I can remember waking up in recovery crying over and over that I couldn’t breathe. I have no idea what happened here. I went into surgery at 11am, it took about 4 and a half hours, as they also took my gallbladder out, but I wasn’t put into a room until about 9pm. I remember laying there for several hours, hardly able to open my eyes, in excruciating pain trying to explain to anyone that I couldn’t breathe. I just kept hitting that morphine button hoping I could see mom or someone soon. Instead of the typical 4 holes you all have, lucky me, I have 6 incisions, as I will show you below.

Once they finally got me upstairs, my mom, dad, brother and gigi were all there to get me settled. Found out there were no complications, but for some reason, in addition to the IV running into my neck, they also added an IV into my left hand. I still have not figured out how or why this was done. I can’t wait until my follow up appointment with my surgeon next week to figure out this mystery. I kept meaning to ask him when he came to visit, but I just couldn’t get out of my morphine haze long enough to remember to do so.

The only thing I can really remember about the first 2 or 3 days in the hospital is finally having the urinary catheter removed and then not peeing for a few days. I also remember the pain. I’m sure everyone’s pain level is different and I’m sure I’ll sound like a total wimp when I say it’s only been in the past day or so that my pain has gotten to a tolerable level. I’m not sure what happened with the fluid retention. The doctors and nurses never got too worried, but they were asking me every time they came in the room if I had peed yet and eventually put a little cowboy hat looking device in the toilet to measure my output. I eventually got into the habit of calling or walking to the nurses’ station to let them know if I had gone. I was only averaging 4 or so ounces of pee per day for a while there. But suddenly after I got a hold of some sugar free jell-o and chicken broth, I was good to go. Friday night they had take away my morphine and started me on the Roxicet. They were giving me a dose or two of some other painkiller that was so so sooo much stronger than morphine. I was so miserable. I can’t remember what it was called. It started with a T.

By the fourth day, I had finally peed enough and had the most satisfying, loud, and semi-horrifying bowel movement of my life and they decided I could go home. So first was my drain to come out. I screamed and cried. I am such a pussy. I literally had no idea A) it would be so incredibly painful and B) how long that thing was!!! It was across my entire abdomen. And here it is, 10 days later and the hole *still* hasn’t closed completely. Then my tri-lumen catheter in my neck was removed. I didn’t feel that at all. So I took my prescriptions for Roxicet and my nausea medication and came home.

The cons so far since I’ve been home… I had so many visitors the first few days and all I did was sleep. I got caught up on my DVR’d shows but I don’t remember watching them. I ate so much pudding and yogurt in the past week; I don’t care if I ever have either again. I have to go back to work on Monday and I’m dreading it. I ache all over, I’m so sick of sleeping on my back. There is a knot the size of a golf ball behind my lowest left (but not my furthest left) incision that no amount of walking or ice packs seems to shrink. I’m still limping around my pain, I’m afraid to shower and open my sutures back up (I have some weird glue over them that is slowly peeling off and leaving angry red rashes behind.) I’m so afraid I’m putting too much obligation on my boyfriend and not at all being attentive to his needs and I keep trying real hard to be social but have to go home and sleep after and hour or two because I’m exhausted. I’m so sick of the foods I have to eat already and I crave my old foods. I thought I wasn’t supposed to be hungry and I don’t know if it’s psychological or not, but I feel like I’m starving sometimes. No matter what I do, I can’t drink enough water apparently. My anxiety is up, but under control. I have to remind myself 100 times a day that this surgery wasn’t a total mistake. I’ve been having really elaborately crazy and unrelated dreams.

But on to the good things… I went in to surgery at 306 lbs. Due to my fluid retention I was up to 330+ in the hospital. As of this morning I am at 290. I couldn’t tell you the last time I was 290. It’s been 10 years maybe. I was 250+ when I graduated high school 13 years ago. My sex drive is up and is out of control. Been able to have some very gentle but "productive" sex… my boyfriend has been unbelievably supportive. My friends and family have been amazing. I am sticking to the diet extremely closely, even thought I hate it because I’m scared to death of getting sick. I haven’t thrown up yet, haven’t dumped (fingers crossed). Every morning I wake up and hurt less and less, and I am in a better mood.

That’s all for now. I lay there last night for hours trying to think of the things I was going to tell you all, but I’ll post more later on when I think of them. Thanks for all your support and good vibes. I don’t think I could have made it without you all!

now for pictures:

rocking the morphine pump, post-op

my awesome surgeons, dr Kohn on the left, me, dr farrell on the right. What would their kids look like?

my six incisions :(

going home, my awesome nursing staff!!!