katsparks

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I can hardly believe that it has been 10 weeks since my surgery. I have lost 60 pounds so far. However, for the last 2-3 weeks, I am only losing about 1 pound a week. It is making me really nervous. I always lose it over the weekend. I am always worried that this is going to be the end of my weight loss. I would imagine that is pretty normal. I am still not able to eat very much. I am lucky if I am able to eat more than 1/4 cup of anything. Foe the first 2 months, I never got sick. But these last 2 weeks, I have thrown up several times. It seems like it usually happens when I eat too fast or if I am having converstaions when I am eating. I tend to swallow too much air and then everything gets stuck. IT TENDS TO BE REALLY FRUSTRATING!
I am finally dropping sizes, so that is great. i am now wearing a 16 regular (not 16 womens). That was really exciting for me. I started this at a 20/22 with the stretch and a 3x-4x shirt, I am wearing a 1x shirt and could probably go down another size.
I am trying to get used to this new body. I am having some self esteem issues that I am trying to work through, but I will do it. I am so grateful that I was able to have this surgery. I do not have the words to express that joy that comes to me when I see myself becoming who I always was without being fat.

Today I am 16 days post op. It's funny because I never ever thought that I would ever be post op. I am so grateful that I was able to have this surgery. My husband says to me that he can see that I am losing weight, I don't see it yet. It is amazing how distorted my view of myself is. I have been taking pictures of myself every Thursday since surgery and I am noticing a difference. They are only head shots, maybe I need to do body also. But I am noticing that I am losing my extra chin. That is a great thing. Today I stepped on the scale & it has not moved in 2 days. I really need to stop being a slave to the scale. But damn, it is so hard!! Some of my pants are fitting looser but I have really noticed in my shirts. They are just way too big and my belly does not stick out as much. So far I have had no issues with food. The only thing that kinda upset my tummy was some thinly sliced sandwich meat...not good. Other than that I have been good to go. Today I am really tired. I'm not sure why but I am just pooped! I slept well....I keep forgetting to take my multi vitamin....that is probably the issue. Anyway, I am so grateful that I am able to be on the journey to a healthier me!!

So, today is 2 weeks from the day that I had my surgery done. I need to write down everything that I remember since this blog has become kinda like a journal of of this roller coaster! So, I checked into Sutter Auburn Faith hospital late on Tuesday, April 27th, my paperwork said that I was to be there at 8:15 & I found out I really should have been there at 7:30 but they forgot to call me! Oh Well! The weather was crazy, it was pouring rain & we had really high winds. But, I LOVE that kind of weather so it was all good with me! So, we get to the pre op area and my mom & Dominic were back there. Dom does not do well in hospitals, so he left to go get my mom something to drink. So they started to get all of my info & then the dreaded IV. They gave me some Novocaine to help numb the area first but it did not help. The IV hurt!!! However, once the IV was in, they gave me Versed to relax. That was really helpful. About 15 minutes before I went into the operating room, Dr. Jenkins came in to talk to me. We said a prayer together and I felt really good and comfortable with my decision. As I was wheeled into the operating room, I was greeted my Dr. A (my anesthesiologist). He was so sweet! And good at knocking me out! We were all joking around in the operating room and the next thing I remember I am waking up after surgery.
The pain that I was in was unbelievable! About 60% of the pain was in my back from laying flat for so long. I ended up being maxed out on all of the pain meds that I could be given. That sucked! They also had some sort of air mattress that they blew up under me..that helped so much! I loved that thing. Once I was transferred to my room, my back really somewhat better just from the change in the bed. I was still hurting really bad and super out of it until about 6:45 PM. It was so strange....all of a sudden I felt ok. I had my first visitors at around 7 pm. They were my Visiting Teachers from church. They brought me some really pretty flowers. It was a nice visit. After they left, the hospital staff installed a trapeze to my bed. That thing helped me so much! I was able to adjust and move around without using my stomach muscles. It was awesome! I ended up sitting up at the end of the bed and then moving to sit in the chair in my room for about 30 minutes. That was heaven on my back to just have no pressure on it. By 8:30 I was back in bed asleep until my husband came to visit me at 11 PM on his way home from class. I slept on and off all night. The next morning I got up, got my catheter out (YAY!!) took a sponge bath and was given some diluted apple juice. That apple juice was amazing! I loved it! I was taking my sips and even did some walking. Dr. Jenkins came by (on his day off) to visit me and see how I was doing. I still had a lot of nausea, but on Thursday, Dr. Jenkins switched around my meds as well as giving me a muscle relaxer for my back and it was smooth sailing from there! No more nausea, I was able to do whatever I needed to do. I could get out of bed unassisted and I was walking like crazy. Dr. Jenkins and I discussed me going home on Thursday, but I felt better staying 1 more day to make sure that the meds were all going to work together. I take a really strong pain medicine for my back already & sometimes it will actually block other pain medicines from working. So, pain management was definitely a concern. Dr. Jenkins agreed and I stayed until Friday. I was released on Friday morning and went home. It was so nice to be in my own bed and have my own stuff around. I rested in my room a lot. By Monday, I was feeling really good. I had to go pick up a prescription that was sent to the wrong pharmacy so I made Monday my first real adventure outside. I stopped by my work to check in, picked up the prescription, & stopped at the grocery store for some soups and went back home. I was pretty tired by the time I got home and just went back to bed. I ended up going back to work on Thursday (8 days post op). It felt good to be back, however, I was exhausted by the end of the day. All in all, I was happy to be back though. I love my job & I love my boss, so there was no way that I could have stayed home for 4-6 weeks! I would have lost my mind!!

So, I can hardly believe that it has already been a week since I recieved news of my approval. Time is flying! My surgery is only 11 days away (surgery on the 12th day). There is still so much that I have to do. I find myself in a kinda "nesting" typw feeling. I feel like I have a lot of stuff that HAS to get done prior to surgery. Silly stuff like cleaning out the closets. In the meantime, I am still working full time & I am in the middle of coordinating a fundraiser for the Young Women of my church. The fundraiser is 10 days after my surgery. I am trying to delegate anything possible! I also find that I am dreaming about all of the things that I need to do. I wake up feeling like I have not slept at all. Is this normal? Do other people react this way? I just want everything to go smoothly for my family while I am gone. I feel so much pressure to make this fundraiser a success. How do I relax? Somebody please tell me!!!

Also, I am looking to add friends who I can support & who can support me through this process. If anyone is interested, please let me know.

Oh Ya, 1 more thing...what is an "angel" on this site & what do they do?

Thanks for listening to my craziness!!!

So today I got approval for my surgery. I do not believe that I have ever been so excited before in my life. After all is said and done, the insurance company approved me. WOO HOO!!!!  My surgery date is 04/27/2010. I am excited beyond words.

So, today I am feeling really discouraged. I again spoke with Heather at the dr's office. She called the insurance company and spoke with a lady who told her that there was no such thing as a exception. So, but when I spoke with the insurance company today, they said that the request for exception needs to be filed electronically. I told Heather to just try to file electronically and see what happens. I also decided to call the hospital to find out how much it would cost if I paid cash for the hospital stay. The cost is $15,000. I feel so discouraged. I do not have $15k to pay the hospital. I really need this surgery. I just feel defeated right now.

I just pray that I am able to have this surgery. I want to be around for my kids and my husband.

On Friday about 12:45 PM, I got a call from Dr. Jenkins. He tells me that he has bad news. My heart stopped. He goes on to explain to me that we had originally submitted to insurance requesting that the surgery be performed at Sutter Auburn Faith Hospital. There was a problem, SAFH is a Level 2 Center of Excellence and my insurance wants me to go to a Level 1 Center of Excellence. Here is where the big problem comes in.....Sutter Roseville (the only other hospital my doctor has rights to) no longer accepts my insurance for inpatient "elective" procedures. Now, to add insult to injury, my primary doctor is at Sutter Roseville. According to what my surgeon knows...we are stuck. I do qualify for the Lap Band procedure, but I have always planned on the bypass. I was just so devastated on Friday. I was crying to the point that I seriously could not breathe!
By the time Friday evening rolled around, I was getting annoyed by this whole situation. I mean seriously...the difference between a level 1 & level 2 CofE is only numbers. Regardless of what facility I have the procedure at, my surgeon is the same. I think that the whole situation is stupid.
So, at this point, I have called the insurance company to ask if there is a way to request an exception so that the surgery can be performed at SAFH. They told me that the surgeon had to request it. So, I called Heather and gave her the info. My mindset at this moment is that I am not planning on getting the gastric bypass, but I am hopeful that the insurance company will allow for the exception. It just devastates me to think that I have come this close only to have it taken away! I am praying that the insurance company has a heart!

Why does it have to be so hard to wait for an answer? My mind is filled wih crazy thoughts. I dream about what the insurance company says. Every time my phone rings I say a little prayer that it is Heather calling to schedule surgery. What makes it even harder is that Dr. Jenkins and I go to church together, so I have a constant visual reminder. And to make matters worse, our church is not just a casual meet on Sundays if you make it sort of thing....we have weekly activities with church that both of our kids are involved in, I see him & his entire family on Sunday! ARRRRGGGHHH!!!!! Please oh please let the insuance come through quickly. I feel like I am one big fat ball of stress! LOL!! 

Last night I went shopping at Wal Mart. While I was there I found an Eclipse shirt. Of course they did not have it in my size, so I bought it in the largest size they had anyway. When I got home, my husband asked me who I bought this for. I said me. He said...Um..Babe..it looks kinda small. I proudly stated that it was going to be my first after surgery shirt that I will wear when it fits! Wishful thinking!! I am putting the positive thoughts out into the universe!!!

Anyway...I do not think that I have ever wanted something so badly in my life. I want to be here for my kids, I want to cross my legs and be comfortable, I want to feel pretty again, I want to want to have pictures taken of me! This has been quite the journey up to this point and I can't wait to know when I will start on my next phase of it! I am looking forward to the losers bench!

So, I had my final doctors appointment on Friday with my PCP. I was able to get all of my records over to Heather at Dr. Jenkins office at 4 in the afternoon!  I expected to not hear from Heather unti today confirming that  has everything to resubmit to the insurance company. I am sure that you can imagine my happiness when Heather called me at 4:15 and told me that she has everything and will be resubmitting by the 9th!!! WOO!!!HOO!!!! I can not wait until I get the answer from the insurance company. Heather said to expect a minimum 2 week wait......I pray that it is sooner!!!

Well, I had my 1st appointment with Dr. Jenkins in December 09. We submitted to insurance on January 12, 2010. The insurance company came back and said that they needed to get a psych eval (even though the website stated it is not required) and they needed to see 6 months of monitored weight loss in a 2 year period. So, i set up the eval and called my PCP. Apparently he did not always chart that we spoke about my diet & exercise so, I did not have the 6 that were needed. So, I ended up with 4 under my belt and scheduled 2 more!
The psych is done. I have my final appointment with my PCP tomorrpw morning and the PCP is also giving me a letter of medical necessity at that time. If all goes well,Heather at Dr. Jenkins office should be able to resubmit on Monday or Tuesday. I want this surgery so badly! I have so many goals that I want to achieve. This surgery is my last resort. I have tried every diet known to man. I am sick of being fat!!! I just want to be healthy. I am only 32 years old and I have so much time ahead of me. I am afraid that if I do not get this surgery, I will die. There is no way that my body can continue to support me at my current weight.
I trust Dr Jenkins completely. I know him prsonally (we go to church together). He is an amazing man, a great father & husband and someone who truly cares about people. He has never made me feel like crap for being fat. I have had so many Dr's treat me horribly because of my weight.
I have a normal blogspot blog where I am documenting my journey also, but I am going to post here so that I have  additional support from the OH community!