kdizzle

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Can't believe it is really 3 days away...! Right now, it is 1pm and by this time Wednesday, I will be out of recovery, and hopefully in my room.
One minute I have everything done, then remember something else.
Oh yea, did I mention, I have no car working?  Yea, I got stuck on 680 right as your almost under the Bart tracks... climbed out on the right side, damn car was too close to the right lane of traffic for me to get out. I could have, but used my better judgment and did as I should. I was coming back from my Pre-Op apt With Dr Hahn. So I was on a OMG it is happening buzz, what else can do, no crying, what good would that do. AAA was there fast, I know the drill, use to be married to a AAA driver...lone female, is a priority call. Thank God my mechanic was still there, bad news, so now to get my Saturn down to the guy across from my mechanic, to get the tranny done.

OK so back to surgery... was in , "hey I am good" to now... scattered, going from room to room, damn wish I had a Dumpster...not that the house is a mess, but the closets... mostly the one in the hallway... how many curtain rods bent do I think I need to save...omg? See... well, it did not make it as easy with my granddaughter being here for 4 days... I love her, but you know you are not able to get things done with a 4 year old around.. bless her little heart.

Not sleeping worth a darn. I have been waking up, wandering around, then go back to bed... I am so tired... I am looking forward to the hospital to be honest.   I worry about things, like, will my dog sitter really hang out with the dogs, will Charita stay over night like she is suppose to? Sorry, but my dogs are not going to be in crates the whole 2 days I am gone. They can be crated during the day, if someone is not here, but NOT at night... not fair.

That is what my worry is. Not about the squishy foods after, I have got that all taken care of. Cooked, froze stuff, in mini amounts, for once in my life... this I am prepared for.

Remind me later when I am bitching about something... sorry for the slang... but it fits. More later tomorrow


 

Just got home, I have been care giving for a wonderful woman who is 101. Dagny turns 102 Sept 28. I love older people, I spent a lot of time with my grandmother right up to the end of her life... she lived to 103.

This has nothing to do with surgery.... it has been just a good way to divert my mind and think about other things... but I have been on OH all day... too much time on my hands.

Well I heard from Bariatrics on Friday about 4pm... and now have my date. October 6, 2010. !!
First night, I slept the best I have in months... all the wanting to have a date... I was stressing to much.

Now I am waiting for the paperwork for my pre op on Sept 30 with Dr Hahn. Darn mail, all the stuff I do not need... food ads... junk mail... lol.
Ordered my medic alert from Laurens Hope... I am making my own bracelet. I took a jewelry class so it will give me something to do between now and surgery.

No one to stay the night with my dogs... which freaks me out. They are spoiled rotten. Echo is a Mommy's boy, and Sierra.. is just my sweet Sissy... and they both always sleep with me. they are not use to being crated all night. There is no way in ___ that I am having my druggie daughter stay here ... who knows what she will take .... when I am in the hospital. I guess pray that I am at peace with perhaps my trying to persuade my dog sitter Nashaun to PLEASE stay all night at my house or at least a good part of the night.

Well... perhaps more tomorrow......

After encouragement from friends and support group members and people here on OH, I emailed my own surgeon at Kaiser. I have been concerned about getting my surgery date so that I may complete my 1 year while I have my cobra coverage at Kaiser. I jumped through the hoops. Completed all my tests and have been at surgery target weight since a week after I met Dr Hahn.

I heard from Dr Hahn and he said, "he would see what he could do" ..which I take... as at least positive. All I can do is hope and keep my attitude positive.

I made it through my flexible Sig test today........and it was really easy. I had imagined pain , a lot of pain, and I had none.
I watched the faces of all the people in the waiting room...no one would look at one another... perhaps, that they might have to actually speak... and say which screening test they were having. I soon learned, but the shortness of time in the room to the left.. that was the room I would be in , or at least... it was through that door.

I was not going to watch as she scoped but I was intrigued... and was surprised at how interesting it was. My doctor... Ms (something) I don't remember her name... at first glance, she looked my age. She reassured me it was going to be easy. I was thinking.. "Your nuts Dr"  but kept silent.
It was over as fast as it began... and I have no polyps.. but do have some divertili ,(spelled wrong) at first glance, it looked like a water bubble... so I do have 3 of them in my lower GI.. but I am fine... don't really know what that means... but what this whole thing means is ......this is the last test I am required to do for Dr. Hahn.
I had them weigh me... and after all that crap I drank.............I knew I would weigh less...Hurray............179... my 10% required by Dr. Hahn..!! I made sure it was recorded!!!

I called Fremont Bariatric....right away................! Now I wait for him to review my chart......will take up to a month...but I am there, thank God!

I am so pissed off... I can't stand it. I called to get my sigmoidoscopy (spelled wrong) and they gave me a Sept date. I got off the phone and cried.
When I went for my psych evaluations I had different clothes, they were heavy... and I now am not 5 pounds from surgery scheduling goal. So now Nancy told me I am off the list at this point until I loose the 3 pounds.. and it was the blinking clothes. She told me to call in to the weight reporting line and let them know as my weight changes.
Now the test as of 4pm is now August 16,.. in the morning. I am a wreck.up and down... this is driving me nuts.
I am telling myself to Buck up and put my big girl panties on and get over it.  Easier said than done.
Now looks like it will be November before I get my surgery... I want to cry...!

Drive from Concord to Fremont was pretty uneventful. Actually traffic was pretty good , no snags! Pulled into the parking lot with water, my binder. I packed a lunch bag.. yogurt, watermelon and chicken breast I cooked last night. I was not about to step on that scale today with anything in me. Every ounce counts at this point.
So.... weighed in at 184.5!  Then back to check vitals... yes I am alive and breathing. I swear if they could ever make a cuff that would not kill me... I would love it. Nurse explained that for some reason, it registered low pulse... funny, I could feel it in my neck every time the cuff tightened. She finally switched arms... who would guess... my right arm is the one to use from now on!

I meet Dr Hahn... tall slender man.. does not look at all like his picture in the lobby. He actually looks like a friend I use to date years ago...lol! He asked me questions, talked, more questions, explained more things... checked me for hernia's on my stomach area... said I am fine. He does want a sigmoidoscopy, the fit test is not good for his choosing, I agree. He wrote the order. I have to be 179 for surgery... I am 184. I have 5 pounds to loose. Told me to call my weight in on the call in number as often as I want....lol  oh if he only knew... but I bet by next weekend I will hit the 179. Then I am to go into Kaiser and get it recorded.There was not getting him to let me schedule now...nope... was not going to do it... was nice about it... but firm.
So back to the waiting room........... now to see the nutritionist. She by the way, is a size 2 and skinny, but actually very nice. She had the fake food on plates... talked about nutrition, water intake... I offered her my readouts from this website... I have been logging every morsel in for a month now. She really felt that "I get it" Now back to the waiting room.
Waiting room by the way was full of people who were in my orientation class 3 weeks ago. We all were chatting how we have done since orientation what protein powder ...lol  is this not the funniest. Everyone asks that here , when I meet WLS people... !
So now... the coordinator Nancy ( I knew her name from my friend Ray who had surgery) was to be the one now giving us instructions... alas... it is Virgina...filling in.  She booked my Psych evaluation for next Tuesday at 8:30am. Oh yea.. Dr Hahn wants me to get a sigmoidoscopy. Oh I have the "Test" to do.. and mail it back in, but since I will be in Fremont on Tuesday I will turn it in then.
So stopped my the salon where Ray works (my support team) . I swear he has lost more weight since I saw him a week ago. I will check with radiology tomorrow about the pending test. As soon as I get it, the better.
It is for real ............. and going to happen. I will have the new tool in my tool box soon!!

Well tomorrow is the beginning of my journey for real. I have my first meeting with the doctors and other staff that will be my "team" . I have chosen to change doctor's, I heard that Dr. Hahn you can wait for 6 months ore more for a  date with him.
Here is my dilemma, besides being overweight.. I lost my job and I am on unemployment. Never had this in my whole life,, and here I am at 57, no job. Do I tell them? I have cobra coverage, I will pay that ahead so there is no question about coverage..... but I am so afraid that if I say anything, it will put me in a different pool;.
I have worked hard the past 2+ weeks and have lost...5 1/2 pounds. I know I am freaked out,. about something that I have put in my own mind! 
No soda at all for almost 3 weeks. I think that is good, but I am so fricken tired from no caffeine. The B12 has not kicked in as yet. I get down the Met RX shake, it is not too bad... I did put 1/4th of a banana, which made it really good.
My daughter wants nothing to do with my decision. She was pretty P.O.'d that I asked her to join me at the orientation...and said.."Don't ever ask me that.. I am too busy".
So I do have a great support , Kathi, Ray and Gina who all have had this surgery. I am stoked.
I have had two shoulder surgeries. so the surgery does not bother me so much, I know what surgery can be like, however not WLS, whole different ball game.
My cupboards are stocked with broth, cream of chicken soup, and tune for the future.
NOW I just have to bet 14 more off then I am ready for surgery... so here I go!

Got up early... my friend Debbie was driving from Livermore to go with me to my informational meeting at Kaiser Walnut Creek. I was up at 6 something... all excited about what was to be talked about... might as well get up... did not sleep, I was way to excited.
My sweet friend drove... omg.. she drives very cautiously... I had ants in my pants... we of course hit every red light on the way there... We walked into the room straight up at 9am... almost no place to sit... I of course... did not want to sit in the chairs in the back... I prefer to lean on something if possible... since I don't have much of a lap... ( and I said that out loud... everyone laughed). Yea.. like I want to be the class clown NOT. I do not like being late... drives me nuts!

2 hour class was awesome, but I thought this was the REAL orientation meeting... nope, not yet! Video and discussion was good.. I read the booklet I swear 3 times that afternoon.
I emailed my doc... now the ball is in her lap... and she rocks by the way.... she sent my referral in the minute she got my email!  So now I play the waiting game!
I downloaded the complete handbook we will be given in Fremont. I know I will devour it... notes, side comments... and questions to ask on post a notes... tiny ones! Well this is a start... so here we go!

Have had the most wonderful doctor apt today. Who looks forward to doctor apts.... me! I had emailed Dr. Rapp about my wanting surgery, so she knew what I was coming in for.
She walked in with s smile! I had my meds, pictures, list of why I feel surgery is important...she listed and then said..." Do you mind if I register you for the meeting which you have to do first!" I jumped up, said "YES"..! So that is my start!!!!!!!!!