WLS Dreams and Lack of Family Support

May 12, 2009

Hey Ya'll

So im still anxiously awaiting to find out my date. Only two more days till i get the call!.

Ever since i got the call for my first consultaion, i dream about the surgery. Whether it be, im actually on the table, in the hospital, life after, or finally making it to goal. I have these dreams many times a week. I think its so wierd that is taken ahold of me like it has. It's like the first time i actually have HOPE! I know if i utilize my tool and follow the rules i have chance to be "normal". Do you ever see those skinny girls at the movies, or a resturant, or shopping, and you look at thier waist and it looks smaller than your thigh. And you think what it must be like to walk around with such a small body. Why wernt you chosen in life to have that figure. Why on earth was i selected to be Ginormous!  Ever since i decide to pursue WLS it's like i can finally see myself as that normal person, i feel like i have already been given my life back!

Is it wrong of me to want my family to jump up and down and scream for joy. My family knows how i have struggled with my wieght, and i am by far the biggest one in the family. Its not they dont support me, its just that they kinda change the subject when i told them i was approved. I feel like i always give 110% to my family and i just want a little back. I live in this new city alone with my father and i really have nobody to turn to. I was hoping i could look to my family to help me through this, but know one cares, so i cant see them making the drive down for it. Do i sound really selfish?

Well there it is, Just a little bit about what going on with me this week

Anxiously awating the losers bench!
Kim

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