WL J.
I am 30 yrs old, a mother of one lil girl who is 3 going on 30. I am 255lb 5'6" currently and just sick and tired of being sick and tired. In the last year I have lost 50lb and gained the 50lbs back and I feel so disgusted. Well I originally began looking into this surgery about 5 years ago because I was tire of slim fast, jenny craig, phen fen, but at the time I talked myself right out of it and started atkins diet.... which I lost about 35 lbs...and guess want about a year and a half.... gained it back and lost it and gained it back ... I dont have a problem with loosing it which are usually in drastic ways... but the keeping it off is a battle..life change is neccessary.... In 2005 I had made up my mind that it was time for me to get my life together and be happy. I decided to have a baby since I knew I would be gaining at least 50lbs as my mom gained over that amt each time pregnant with myself and my siblings. so I planned my daughter... end up gaining 70 lbs....did weight watchers and lost the 50lbs I mention above. So I began looking to lap band vs GNY and at first leaned towards the band because I felt cutting and rearranging my insides was out of the questions. I discuss my options with my mom (who is 240 lbs) and my sister (who is 135lbs) They just gave me hell about the thought of surgery. I have now come to realize my mom didnt want to be left as the only still big, and my sister didnt want me to be competition in her eyes. I know they both love me and are scared of change and the possibilities of death. Dont get me wrong I think I am way sexy and way attractive ( I carry ALL the weight pretty good by covering up LOL) to the others but I want to feel it deep within myself no bulging and rolls to hide :) When I go out I GO OUT and do the damn thing... but there is always the insecurities about my weight in the back on my mind.. So my mom tells me I am selfish and she will not ever speak to me again if I have any surgery. I will have to go here for a minute. I told you my mom is about 5'4" 240lbs with Diabetes Heart Disease Triple bypass Heart surgery at age 40 Asthma Sleep Apnea High Blood Pressure I tried to explain how I am 30... only 30 and I have Asthma Sleep Apnea (sleep with cpap machine) High Blood Pressure AM I STUPID OR ARE THERE REAL SIMILARITIES THAT COULD TAKE ME OUT OF HERE AT ANY POINT IN TIME. MYSTERIOUSLY THEY MATCH UP TO MY MOTHER'S HEALTH HISTORY... DAHH!!! I swear trying to explain to her my reason for even thinking about surgery just went in one ear and out the other. why oh why... then she tells me I dont care about my daughter if I lay on the operating table and dont wake up..... HOW AZZ BACKWARDS IS HER LOGIC..... I COULD GO ON AND ON ABOUT THE CRAZY PEOPLE IN MY FAMILY BUT I AM READY FOR THE JOURNEY TO BEGIN. I am happy where I am in life with my home, my daughter, my job... my relationship, I know God's Will - will be done in my life.... After meeting with Dr. Meilhan I have decided on Gastric Bypass Surgery and feel really confident in this decision. When meeting I was concern that because I dont look my actually weight that after surgery I would look like a smoker... very unhealthy... Dr. Meilhan explained that every procedure is in some measures fit each individual.. wouldnt bypass the exact same amt for a 250 lb woman versus a 400lb woman ..... and Dr. and I would determine a comfortable goal and I would be responsible for using the tool given to make it happen !! :) I will update a timeline in a little while of my journey experience so far. I am currently scheduled for phyc eval, nutrionist, and group session July 22, 2008. I have put a down payment for a cruise to Jamaica in March of 2009....I am so geeked and ready to be healthy and to looooooosssseeeee . please keep me in your prayers........
