LaraNicole
I have had a struggle with my weight since I was in high school. I started off as a Freshman weighing 115 a little under weight for being 5'5.5". I was sent to Washington, DC live with my father that summer and went up to 160. After a year living with him I came back home to Texas and was put on a diet by my mother who has suffered from eating disorders all her life. I was paid to lose weight, $20 for 5lbs. When school started up I was down to 140 and by the end of the year I was down to 120. All my friends were jealous of how I just seemed to lose all this weight. Yeah right, it was hell. I did everything to lose weight. I was crazed about it.
After I went to college I started gaining again and then losing until finally when I was 21 and weighing 135 I got married. I married to escape my father and his control over me and how I looked as well as my mother. HUGE mistake. My husband was horrible at 135lbs he told me I was fat, so I gained 15lbs instead of losing it. After four years of marriage and gaining 70lbs I was sick of the mental and physical abuse so I left. Once again back in Texas I started to lose the weight. I was able to lose about 30lbs, not all I wanted, but it was ok.
I started another abusive relationship, but this time I got pregnant. I gained 40lbs with my daughter and a year later gained another 40lbs with my son. Their father left after 6 years and although when he walked out I lost an instant 185lbs. I needed to get the weight actually off of me. But then there's the depression, what a great friend depression is, so kind and comforting. So here I was, a single overweight mom with no energy. Not good at all.
Then comes December 2003...I fell in love, this time with the right man. He is loving and supportive and CHRISTIAN. What a God send he has been. Now, I have begun my true journey into losing the weight I have built up for the last 10 years.
3/23/05 So I have not heard back from my insurace company yet because my Drs. offic is having a huge problem getting the paperwork to them. Ugh. I just wanted this to go smoothly. I have so many things going on right now. It just seems like everything takes time and all I do is wait and wait and wait.
3/01/05
We are trying to get a house and our mortgage broker told us we had three things we needed to take care of on our credit. I got them all taken care of so now, but it took and month and a half they were mistakes on the credit report. It is so hard to correct other people mistakes. So now we have to wait 3 days to see what kind of rate she can get us. We are crossing our fingers and praying.
I am dealing with a new diagnosis of Bipolar II and new medications not too much fun to deal with trying to work, be a wife and mother and deal with medication. I am getting used to it but every week I have to up my doss so it makes me shaky again. I think in about two more weeks I will stabilize though. So here I am at age 34 having to learn patience. I hate being patient, but I am learning.
There is good news though we are getting $6,000 back in taxes so that will cover the new furniture we picked out for our new house if we get the loan. 
I have Humana EPO. I just called them and the lady I spoke with said that she *thinks* if I get approved then everything having to do with the surgery will be approved and then since the fills will be done in the Drs. office they will be just like another co-pay. She also told me that it usually does not take more than a week for them to make decisions. She said that they have a check off list and basically would get my paperwork and call my Drs. office and go down the check off list and if everything is checked off I am good to go. The only pre req's she knew of were the bmi and the supervised diet. I asked her if I could actually talk to someone that has that check list and she said not unless I was a Drs. office. So, I guess I have a little more info. If I get approved my insurance will pay 90% of the surgery, but I have a $1,400 max out of pocket and this includes all copays before surgery. So for everything I only have to come up with $1400 if I get approved.
MARCH 6, 2005
Psych Eval has been sent to Insurance Company so I should here something back withing a week now. I am getting very nervous now. Scared even. We got approved for the house and should close on the 31st of March so everything is happening so fast. I feel like I need to slow down and sleep for a month. After we move and I have the surgery I am going to take a week off and sleep. Just sleep. I want to have the surgery ASAP, but the best time is when the kids are out for summer which is the end of May. I just don't know if they will let me wait two months before I schedule it.
My new meds are working wonders. I feel so much better and I have no binge eating. I still think about it and that scares me that I will start it again, but I haven't so far. I know that my meds will be uped if I do and the surgery will definitely not allow me to do that, but for now it is up to me. If I eat too much right now I get sick. What I mean by too much it half a small hamburger and half a thing of medium fries is too much. My stomach starts to hurt real bad. It is like I have the surgery right now, which is good. The problem is the meds will not maintain this at all and I can not live on them forever. Once I reach the maximum dose they will start to taper off and stop working, plus they are not for weight loss they are for the Bipolar II. They just keep me from Binge eating which is from the Bipolar II.
What has happened with all my medications...
Ist round of meds...
Topamax
25mg at bedtime for 7 days
25mg in morning/25mg at bedtime for 7 days
25mg in morning/50mg at bedtime for 7 days
50mg in morning/50mg at bedtime
Cymbalta 30mg in morning
Klonapin .5mg 2x per day
OK...after 3 weeks the Cymbalta was ruining my life. I was not sleeping at all. I would wake up at 1am and not sleep again until 10pm the next day and then wake up again at 1am and over and over again. I was racing around and talking in circles. I was not eating at all and i started thinking that I hated everyone. I had my doctor take me off of it.
The Topamax was making forget things so we added another medication to counter that effect...
Second round of meds...
Topamax 50mg morning/50mg at bedtime
Lexapro 10mg in the morning
Lamictal 25mg at bedtime 7 days
Lamictal 25mg morning/25mg at bedtime 7 days
Lamictal 25mg morning/50mg at bedtime 7 days
Lamictal 50mg morning/50mg at bedtime
So far I am feeling 100% better the binge eating has slowed down to about 95%. I am getting happy for the first time in years I can say that I have been happy consistently.
*March 14, 2005 UPADATE*
Today we fond out exactly what we need to finish up with to get into the house. We have been praying so hard. I bought the trampoline from the current home owners so if something happens and this falls through, lol we own a trampoline now. I am certain God wants us to have this house.
Tomorrow I have to go for a full psych eval the letter from my shrink did not work so I have to have a full eval. Tomorrow is also the last day I can have my paperwork sent to my insurance company before it goes into appeal status.
September 2004 Miscarriage
October 2004 Attend WLS Seminar in Round Rock, TX
February 2, 2005 Meet with Surgeon
Present - waiting on Surgeon to submit papers to insurance
Went for a psych eval on my own - have been diagnosed with Bipolar II and put on three different meds.
April 14, 2005
I am APPROVED for surgery! We also got the HOUSE and moved in. This has been a wonderful and heartbreaking month. My daughter Bailey has been diagnosed with PANDAS Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorders Associated With Streptococcal Infection. It is a rare a horrible disorder with lots of complications. I have been taking her all over Austin for tests. Please pray for her and my family.
I will get a surgery date soon!
I have a surgery date!!! May 12, 2005. I did my preop appt today. I have already started my preop diet and it is yucky, but I have a goal so I will survive. I am getting so excited now. My angel is sending me a goody box. She is soooo wonderful. I just adore her. She has been such an inspiration to me. We email all the time. She totally keeps me sane with all the crap I deal with I NEED that.
Bailey now has Tourettes, OCD, ADHD, Mood Disorder and Insomnia caused by the PANDAS. She is on Lexapro for now and this summer she will be put on stronger meds. SHe is doing well considering. If you are done this far you have seen her picture and know how beautiful she is. She is a true ANGEL and to have this happen is a nightmare. God has his reasons and has given her the right mother because I know I can get her through all of this. I love her so much.
May 10th
OK, 2 days until surgery. Everyone is doing well. I am on edge. I have a ton of laundry to get done before Thursday. We went shopping last night. We bought all kids of easy meals for Randy and the kids. I got liquid stuff and mushy stuff for me. LOL, Bailey said um why are you buying baby food. They know I am having surgery, but they don't understand what that means. Their nana is coming over to get them from school while I am in the hospital and then Randy will come home that night. Should be interesting.
Bailey is doing well. Her meds are working for the tics but that is about it. We need to get her mood disorder under control the rest we can live with. I could even live with the tics although some where very interesting. Poor babygirl.
===MAY 16TH===
Ok, I am back to the living. The surgery went very well. I however did not do well at all from the anesthesia and morphin. I came home Friday afternoon and was not able to get up until Sunday due to nausea and diarrhea. I got the meds I needed from calling my surgeon and having my wonderful husband pick them up from the pharmacy. I wish I had them on Friday, but I am so much better now and even got the girls off to school today.
July 30, 2005
I have lost a total of 53 pounds and I am doing very well. It is hard to eat some foods, but other than that I LOVE my band and I can not imagine not having it. I am so proud that I have it and I tell everyone about it. All my friends and family are amazed at how much I have lost so far and ar very happy for me. I can not wait to see how much I have lost May 12th 2006.
My family is doing great. Bailey is doing super and is now taking Clonidine to help her sleep and help with the tics caused by Tourettes. We love our house and have settled in, but still have lots of boxes to unpack.
All and all I am happy happy happy!
Today is Tanner's 1st day of kindergarten and he turned 5. I am going to be very lonely with no kids all day but, the peace and quiet will be nice. I have GOT to get a fill. I have not lost any weight in the last 2 weeks. I am done 55lbs. and just can't get any more to come of. I know I am able to eat more now so I really need a fill bad.
I am going to finally get some new clothes when I get paid this month. I have barely anything to wear now and am having to do laundry every three days so I can wear the same things over and over, ugh. Also, my pants are starting to get ripped because they are so big that I step on them or sit on the excess material. It is such a trip that I have nothing that fits. I have not been into clothes in years because I hated buying 26/28. It will be so much fun to get 18's. I also can not wait until nothing in Lane Giant fits me anymore. That will be the best feeling ever!!!
I know I did not get fat over night and the I still have 9 months to go until my year is here but, I want to lose more NOW. I realized that I lost 10pounds since July 14 and that is awesome but, I want more and since I haven't lost in the last 2 weeks I feel cheated out of at least a 4 pound loss. Gonna get that fill SOON!!!
August 30, 2005
Today I hit my first goal of 220 pounds. I am so happy. I have lost 60 pounds and working on the next 21 for my big goal of 199. I hope to be there in December. Right now I am tight but, the restriction is getting looser day by day. I have to make sure I get enough calories in. We are adding another day of Taekwondo this week so that will help too.
My job is going great, my house is wonderful and we are all happy right now. Bailey is doing fine although she has a few tics right now. Tics come and go. Her mood is the biggest issue but, we are learning to live with it. I have been lonely without Tanner this year but, it is getting better and he loves school accept when I have to wake him up in the morning. Poor thing is so sleepy and he goes to bed at 7pm!!!
By the way, did I mention I totally adore my husband??? He is so wonderful.
Future Update
Sept. 14, 2005
Well, I am down 63 pounds. My fill was way too tight and I just kinda never lost anything until this week. I also gained a ton of water weight PMSing and have now settled down at 217. The good news is I am now definitely in 18s and very happy. I am working on 16s and the next 17 pounds. Not getting a fill for a while. Need to get my eating back to normal right now.
September 19th
Today I am down 65pounds and counting. I forgot to take my meds last night so I am feeling a little depressed today and I have a ton on work to do. Lately I have been doing really good with exercise and my band but, the rest of my life seems to be falling a part.
See, I work at home. I work for a real company as the Director of Training. I never see anyone everything is over the phone and all of my clients are government employees. It is very stressful at times. Here is the website I designed and maintain http://www.visualpowerfiles.net Now, I also have three kids that I take to school and pick up because I think busses are dangerous. My busiest time of day is between 3-4 when I get the kids home. See my 3-4 is the Government's 4-5 because they are all in DC and they call nonstop and I am trying to do homework and get snacks together and work. Randy gets home at 4 and then I am done for the day but, he never sees all the stress or realizes that I NEED help.
I also, have an actual mountain of laundry that needs to be washed and another mountain that needs to be put away. My dishes are piling up and my carpet is two months past needing to be steam cleaned. I have to get a handle on my life somehow. Any ideas, please let me know.
Future Update
Wow, it has been so long since I have updated here. I have lost a lot of weight and I am so very happy. I am wearing size 16 now and can't wait to get into 14's. I did fix my problem at work and with my life. I hired a personal assistant and was made a Vice President so I am making more money and have more time to do things since my assistant has been helping so much.
My life is going very well right now.
April 19, 2006
The NEW ME...I am soooo HAPPY!!! -112 pounds
May 12, 2006
Happy Re-Birthday to ME, 1 year today
Original Post by Lara Nicole at 6:11 AM PST on 05/12/2006
Pflugerville, TX – (05/12/2005) – Rob Fuller, M.D
I made it and I am so much happier than I ever thought possible. It has been a long year but, I have learned so many wonderful things about myself. I have dropped lots of sizes and pounds and can't wait until I get to my final end weight.
My advice to evreyone is to take this one meal and one day at a time. Their will be frustration but, with this tool you can always start over with your next meal. Find new things to occupy your time and get into the world again. I have rediscovered why I am on this planet and I have to tell you it is truly an amazing place to be.
I thank you all for the support you have given me this past year and I look forward to continuing my journey. Thank you and God Bless!
May 16, 2006
Hi everyone, I spoke at a WLS seminar last night and one thing really stuck in my head and that is the topic of emotional eating. The Doctor.r. going over the procedures made a really important comment concerning emotional eating and I spoke about it after him.
What he said was that if you are overeating for emotional reasons you really need to address those reasons before approaching any WLS Doctor. The reason being is that until you change or start to change your emotional eating you can and may sabotage your surgery. People have been known not to lose weight with the band because they do not control what they are eating or drinking. They can do this with ice cream, milk shakes, candy and a variety of other items.
With that being said, I am an emotional eater. I have Binge Eating Disorder. This is a true disorder just like Bulimia or Anorexia. I take medication to help control my overeating and I see a therapist to help get to the root of my problems. I was in painful abusive situations for 32 out of my 35 years. I have made great advances with my overeating, but I know that when I have a break down the first thing I want to do is binge.
My band can control the amount of good solid healthy food I can eat, but it falls short when I grab for a milkshake or chocolate so it is up to me not to make these choices. It is a daily choice that I have had to make in order to lose the weight and let me tell you that it is not an easy thing to have to overcome. There are times when I literally have to leave the house not to make a bad food choice. I am not perfect and I know that there are times over the past year that I have given in, but I get right back on track with my next meal. I take this one meal at a time.
So if you are an emotional eater I urge you to get some help and find out what you can do for yourself to stop the control that this can have over you. Good Luck and God bless!
LaraNicole
300/278/184...150 someday!
May 22, 2006
Well, this week is going to be an emotional ride. I have 3 end of year parties for the kids and I am room mom for one. I had to meet with Bailey's new school officials today and go to an awards ceremony for the other two kids. Weds I am driving to Houston with Bailey to see a Tourettes specialist on Thurs. And then we have a wedding that is out of town on Saturday, grrrrr.
I have not lost anything in about 3 weeks now and I have been very stressed as well so I know that is why. I also struggle with do I need a fill? I think I do but I want to lose 10 mor epounds with this one. I need to exercise so I am looking into a gym. I did not like curves but I do want an all women's gym. We will see what I can find.
Going to start therapy sessions next week (that is the plan). It is $70 an hour and he said I would need AT LEAST 10 sessions, un that is $700, ugh. Oh well, I hope it works.
-Lara
June 20, 2006
Well, I hit a horrible plateau that I am coming out of finally. I have started to lose again and am getting a fill next Thursday. I have 28 pounds until my first ultimate goal of 150 and then onto the super ultimate goal of 135. Dunno if I will ever get there but, I am gonna try after I hit 150. I am working on getting to 170 by August. These last 30 or so pounds are just so hard to get off. It seems like my thighs and upper arms just love the fat that lives there. I hate to dissapoint them but, soon they will have to go too.
Well, I had gallbladder surgery on the 22nd today is the 28th. I am feeling better now but, still have a lot of bloating. I really need a fill right now and I feel like a pig. My Dr. said not to worry about gaining after the surgery. Hmmm, really want to start losing again. I have posted more tonight than I have in months so I think I am ready to get on with losing. I need to lose 25 more pounds to goal and I want to do it by Christmas. My present to me is going to this wonderful store in Wimberly and buying what ever I want there. I love the clothes and can't wait to hit my goal so I can go shopping. A size 10 would be so nice.
October 13, 2006
It is Friday the 13th today. OOOO Scary, lol. I had a horrbile weekend because I had my third miscarriage in 2.5 years. Very sad to go through another one. Finally my Dr. is going to do some serious testing to see what the problem is. All my bloodwork came back healthy and so did my pap test. There are other things they can test so after a quick trip to Maryland next week I will be back and ready to start the testing. Oh, they said I had to wait 2-3 months to try again. Well, um I think that is crazy but, we are waiting until the testing is over and we see what is going on. Now I have two other children and my husband has one so obviously at one time we were fertile just not with eachother. I want him to get tested as well because even though I constantly blame myself for all this he needs to be tested too.
My weight is at a stand still. I still wear a size 14 pants in Jr's but, I want to get into a 12 by Christmas or maternity clothes either one would work, hee!
I love you all and the support you give me.
About Me
Before & After
rollover to see after photo
