LaurenKauf
Hi all! I'm Lauren and 25 years old. I'm going through motions or having Lap-Band Surgery done. I've completed all of my pre-op appointments, so now I'm just waiting for the Insurance approval. I'm keeping my fingers crossed!! Let me tell you a little about me...
The first 10 years of my life I started as a teeny, tiny, little peanut. And then, I was 11 years old when I woke up to the reaction of "Oh My God, you're Fat!" I played it off, with the "It's the way I'm built", "I'll lose it", "Oh what's one more donut?" I was a happy go lucky, polite, little kid.
Elementary school and junior high school were horrible. Constantly picked on because of my weight. Add the light acne and greasy hair from puberty and you've got your a great cocktail of Sadness and depression. To fight depression and sadness, I snacked...ALOT.
High School came along and things were different, I was bigger than just about EVERYONE and I acted like a jerk. Not only was I FAT, I was strong too, so I would almost dare people to mention something about my weight. I'd just pummel them and not even think twice if they did. I fell into "If you can't beat them, join them, and if you can't join them, pummel them". I was an angry individual. Almost with a Robin Hood Mentality. God Forbid if I heard someone make fun of someone else, for ANY thing. The beatings would begin.
I seriously regret my high school actions.
After leaving high school, I used my size as an advantage again. I became a bouncer. Security Staff, and I loved it. My co-workers were all so great, no one treated me fat, no one looked at me funny. Customers would just look at me and run away. (Probably would explain why I couldn't get a date, EVER!) I didn't let the weight bother me, I just put it out of my mind.
I met my husband 2.3.02, and he has been my HERO! I love that man more than anything and he is so supportive of my decision of the surgery. He married me when I was heavy and will stay with me when I'm lighter! He knows that I'm not doing this for the beauty aspect of it, (Though I can't wait to buy smaller clothers!) He knows that my health is a concern. We have been trying to have a baby for about 2 and a half years now to no avail, I have bad knees, an achy back, my arms fall asleep when I sleep, I can't walk very far without becoming winded. The list gos on. He was an athlete his whole life, but still supports me and all of my endevors.
I've definatley developed a sense of humor about the whole thing. It kills my friends because the things I say ARE Funny. But they don't want to laugh because they don't want to hurt my feelings. The way I see it, I'm comfortable enough to make the jokes in front of you, LAUGH!!! It makes me more uncomfortable when thay don't.
I've never seen myself as being "Morbidly Obese" Until recently. And my friends were a huge help to that. They were never pushy about my weight, they supported all of my "Diet of the weeks". And I appreciate them for that.
So these are the things that have happened to me since being fat: I've broken more than one chair by sitting on it, I've had to get off of amusement rides because my butt doesn't fit, I've tried ever diet, fad, exercise work out, weight loss pill and whatever else have you, and nothing has worked, I've grown out of clothes at increddible speeds, I've been called a "Fat Lady" on more than one occasion by an adorable child.
There's a lot more, but I'll keep it brief. And if you've read this far.....Thanks!
~Lauren
