LindaMcCafferty
June 1, 2006
I have a date. Being self pay sure made that easier. My surgery is Jun 26th. It seems like it is just around the corner. My family is on vacation this week, which I certainly need. And then I am back for appt after appt after appt. I have started buying some protein and vitamins and the ever-yummy jello. I have gotten lots of support from most people, but a couple people have been negative. Unfortunately these were from overweight people. I would have thought that they would have been supportive that I was making a decision for my health, but I think that they had mixed feelings and didn't know how to react. That made it more tough on me. More later when I start having my appts.
June 15, 2006.
What a great experience this has been. People have been so nice and open with me. Last night I went to support group and people just out of surgery were willing to show me their g-tubes and scars and tell me what a wonderful experience they had. Especially with my pre-surgery jitters, this has been a really calming experience. I think that I am ready. When I found out that I don't have to do the bowel prep at my pre-op class, you should have seen me do the happy dance. I am so glad that my surgeon no longer requires that. I have done it for a colonoscopy, so I know it isn't that bad, but you do get tired out from it. I have been having fun trying new protein drinks and getting all my stuff for the hospital ready. I think that I am more excited this time than when I went in to have my children. This is definitely a rebirth for me. I am so thankful to all the local people who are sharing their experiences with me, as well as all the OH posters. This has been great. And my 4 year old who is ready to use the blender to make my pureed chicken. She is so sweet.
June 19, 2006.
Had a really rough weekend. It was wonderful. Went out to the park with hubby and kids. Went to a Father's Day BBQ and didn't overeat. My neighor told me not to worry about the family because the neighbors would feed my family for the first two weeks so I wouldn't have to worry about anything. But Sunday, I jsut looked at my family and couldn't stop crying. I was so emotional. Scared I was doing the wrong thing by having this surgery. Felt selfish because I didn't have to have it and was going to leave my kids alone if something happened. And I am still crying a little bit today. Saw my best friend at lunch. He is not going to be here next week during my surgery. I cried because he wasn't going to be here. WOW. I am having my own personal pity party. I had heard from a couple of people who had the surgery that the time before surgery was a real roller coaster. However, I had not experienced any of that. As of yet. It really hit me this weekend. And then others have said, no matter what emotions you have before, you walk into surgery calm, knowing that this is the right thing. I am certainly ready for that. I need to feel a sense of peace. Maybe that will happen after my preop appt tomorrow. I am going to enjoy spending time with my kids and hubby this week and try to remain as positive as I can. Can't let my Little Mary Sunshine fans down.
July 11, 2006
I just read my last post about my pity party. It is sort of funny to think about that now. I am feeling really great two weeks post-op. But that Sunday night was not the last time of feeling that way. Surgery went wonderfully. I was able to get out of bed and into the chair after about 8 hours and took a little walk that evening. Pretty rough. Lots of pain. Lots of nausea, but by the next morning, I was doing great. Walked a lot of laps in the hospital because I wanted to go home. I was able to leave 48 hours after my surgery. It was nice to be home even though I couldn't sleep in my own bed until 4 days after surgery. My lactose intolerance got a lot worse after surgery, which really limited the variety of my protein drinks. I did have to feed the tube for about 4 days with 50 grams of protein drink, but after that, I was able to ingest it all by mouth. And at my post-op 2 week appt, I had lost 21 lbs from my pre-op appt. I am pretty excited. And my blood pressure was so low that they asked me to take my blood pressure medicine every other day and that I will probably be off of it when I go to see my PCP next month. What an awesome thing. And I have been cleared to go back to the gym and to work. I really feel great. I have tried shrimp, chicken, beef, beans, scrambled egg beaters with ff cream cheese and salmon, and everything has gone down really well. I have been using my magic bullet to puree everything, but the NP said that I could just chew the really soft stuff and not have to puree everything if I didn't want to. Yeahhhh. My 4 year old had fun playing with and cleaning my gastric tube. So when they took it out yesterday, I asked if I could bring it home. This was the first time for them. But my daughter was so happy to see if when she same home. When I told her that they were taking it out, she asked if I could have another surgery so that I would have another one. Even though I love her, I wouldn't go through that again, so Tubie in a bag will have to do.
July 25, 2006
Had my one month visit today. I lost another 6 pounds. And I am not disappointed. I have lost a bunch of inches and have gone down two sizes in my clothes. I really do need to start increasing my exercise and then I think that the weight will fall into line. I have been struggling with getting in all my protein with supplements, but trying to get it all in with food. And that has been tough because some of the meat has been hard going down - and then coming back up. I really need to work on slowly down my eating and chewing more. But I am starting to feel really great. and a little more normal because I can eat some of the same foods that my family is eating. That was rough for a while. And I am very close to no longer being super morbidly obese. Yeahhhhh. A couple more pounds to go. I am really excited about that.
July 30, 2006
Well, I am no longer super morbidly obese today. However, I did find out some not so good news today. Even though I have lost 32 pounds, most of it has been muscle. I saw the nutritionist today and she said that almost 25 of my lost pounds were lean muscle. Ouch. I know that I have not been eating enough protein each day, but that seems unbelievable. She advised me to try to add protein by drinking protein supplements during the day, in between meals. She said that I was making good choices in food, but it just isn't enough and I need to eat about 90 grams of protein per day. I was averaging about 40-60. So, when they say eat protein, protein, protein, they mean it. Not eating it didn't slow down my weight loss, but it did affect what type of weight I was losing. I am on a mission now. Unfortunately, most protein supplements taste nasty to me right now, but I have unjury and profect and they seem to be doing the best for me right now, so I will be back to taking those. August 25, 2006 I had my two month visit yesterday and I have lost 36 pounds so far. I could be disappointed with the amount, but I am almost to the end of the clothes closet, so I am ecstatic because this will be the smallest I have been in about 10 years. I didn't have much energy to exercise the last few weeks, but starting this week, I have been walking, doing stairs, lifting weights, etc. It feels so good to feel good. I am going to the Y tomorrow to have a workout set up for me with cardio and weights. I am really excited about seeing what changes my body will take then.
August 30, 2006
I had my appt with the nutritionist today to see how I was doing on my protein and lean muscle mass. All is right again with the world. Things are moving in the right direction. I made a serious effort to eat between 80-100 grams of protein and tried to eat about 600-800 calories. And I did for the most part. And now I have increased my muscle weight by 29 pounds and decreased my fat by 27.5 pounds from the last weigh in. And my fat percentage has gone down by 8%. And I feel really great. I have been able to go to the gym almost every day. I am alternating water aerobics with the treadmill and sit ups. I wasn't able to have my fitness assessment/orientation until Sept. 5th, so I am on my own until then. Tonight I am going to try to do 20 minutes on the treadmill before aerobics. We will see if I can do it with getting the kids from day care, putting them in the daycare at the Y, etc. But I am feeling really good and ready to keep this good weight loss going. We are going to Water Country and Busch Gardens all three days of Labor Day Weekend, so that should be a pretty good workout.
September 25, 2006
Today was my three month visit and my feet are doing the happy dance. I have lost 50 pounds, which is 29.5% of what I need to lose. Doctor today said I should have lost about 30% of what I need to lose and I am there. I am so happy. I feel strong, I feel energetic, I want to go to the gym, I am having a great time. But it really took until about 3 months to really feel like that. I lost 16 pounds of fat and gained 6 pounds of muscle from my last visit to the nutritionist. I am eating about 900 calories a day and getting in between 80 and 100 grams of protein. I am running out of clothes in the closet but I hate to spend money on things that are only going to last a month. But even the couple of new pairs of pants I bought look like I am wearing a diaper, so I guess I need to go shopping. What a great day. And what a great journey.
September 27, 2006
This week just keeps getting better. Went to my PCP this morning and I have lost another three pounds since Monday. And he lowered my blood pressure medicine again and hopes that I will be completely off of it in the next couple of months. He listened to my heart and lungs and said, wow, what a difference. I came back to the office and I was so excited. And my co-worker said, wow, to actually go to the doctor and not be yelled at about your weight. That hasn't happened to me in 17 years. I never really thought about it, but she was right. I have always gone to both my OB/GYN and my PCP for annual visits, and we spent a lot of time talking about my weight. We did today too, but in such a different way. When the nurse asked me to weigh, I actually jumped on the scale. What a difference three months makes. I am taking my four year old to see Disney on Ice: Princess Wishes tonight. It has been a few months since I have been to the Coliseum. I think February. I am looking forward to having the seat feel roomy to me tonight. And not huff and puff when I have to run up and down the stairs a bunch of times to take her to the bathroom. WLS is awesome.
October 2, 2006
First off, Disney on Ice was awesome. I fit great in my seat. And my daughter was so excited that she didn't even want to go to the bathroom, even though I could have run those stairs a bunch. It was great. Today, I went to the OB/GYN and the fibroid that I had last year has doubled in size, she thinks. I am scheduled for a sonogram next week. I thought I could just feel it more because I have lost weight, but she said it felt a lot bigger and harder, so I wasn't just imagining it. It has been difficult to sleep on my tummy, which is my favorite position. But, I did ask her if she has worked with a plastic surgeon during a hysterectomy to give a tummy tuck and she said that she has. That was great news. That way the hospital stay would be paid for and I would just have to pay for the plastic surgery, extra surgery time, and extra anesthesia time. And get twice the pain for the price of one. I hope that works out. Both she and my PCP hope that I can wait another year to have this done so that I will ahve lost my weight, but she is a little worried because it has grown so much in a year. I was hoping the weight loss would slow the growth down, but it doesn't look like it has happened. She told me that it was like carrying another baby. How disappointing that as I lose weight, I will still have this huge bump on my stomach that makes me look pregnant. I guess the tummy tuck will have a real dramatic effect since I will lose a huge bump and flatten out my tummy at the same time. But for now, I just need to worry about losing weight and not focus on that for now.
October 31
Happy Halloween. Just took a bunch of photos of my daughter in her Halloween costume. She is an angel. She doesn't always act like one, but she does look beautiful. Went to the nutritionist yesterday. Lost another 7 pounds this month, but increased my lean muscle mass by 15 pounds and lost 22 pounds of fat. That is where I am really seeing the difference. My body is really changing in shape. And that is all due to the exercise. I really enjoy going to the gym now. I have been to salsa aerobics. I am going to a kickboxing class on Saturday and I am pretty faithful on doing the weights 3-4 times a week. I can eat almost anything now that doesn't have sugar or fat. I am excited that I can eat an apple or a carrot and not feel a huge lump in my stomach. I still throw up every once in a while if I eat too fast or if I haven't waited long enough after drinking to eat, but it is so much better than before. I have a doctor's appt on Friday to have an MRI on the fibroid, so that will bring some decision-making, but it must be done.
December 6th
The saga of the fibroid is over. I had uterine fibroid embolization last Thursday to block the blood supply to the fibroid and hopefully shrink it down to a managable size instead of a basketball. I am still on pain meds but did pretty well. And even after all that and being a little dehydrated, I lost 12 pounds this month. My lean muscle mass numbers weren't acurate because I was dehydrated, but the nutritionist said we would check on that again next month. Made it through Thanksgiving without any problems and without any jealousy of what other people were eating. It is great being on the losing side.
January 16, 2007
Had an amazing WOW moment yesterday. It was just like the Herbal Essence Shampoo commercials. Everyone wanted to know what was going on inside the nutritionist's office. For the first time, maybe in my entire life, my lean muscle mass was higher than my fat mass. I now have a fat percentage of 48%. I started at 74%. Eating all that protein and working out is really paying off. I feel so good. Having surgery is the best decision I could have made. I feel so healthy.
March 6, 2007
I haven't posted in a while. I had to move my monthly nutritionist appt because of travel for work and so I missed my normal posting rhythm. I do go tomorrow , so I will probably post again. However, last night I had two awesome WOW moments that I wanted to track.
I was at the gym, taking a shower after going to kickboxing class (couldn't imagine saying I did that six months ago) and I was grabbing up my shampoo and soap. Without thinking about it, I wrapped my towel around my waist. And then I thought about what I just did. I haven't tried that in about oh, 10 years, and I was amazed that everything was covered up.
Then I walked over to the locker and was getting dressed next to a woman probably 15 years or more younger than me and she told me what a cute shirt I was wearing and where did I get it. I was flabbergasted for a moment. She was tall and thin. Why would she be asking me about clothes? And then I remembered that it is a size Large and she probably could wear that size because of how tall she is. I haven't been asked about clothes by a non-plus sized person in probably 15 years. I have always been particular about my appearance but this was a WOW for me.
And I was 209 pounds this morning, so I am so close to onederland that I can't wait. My birthday is in 10 days, so it may happen by then, but by the end of the month for sure. Yippee.
March 27, 2007
The month of March is a blurr. I had a great nutritionist visit. I have 121 pounds of lean muscle mass. That is so awesome. We were actually talking about my goal weight being in the 160s. That is a lot more than I thought, but it would make sense since I have really been working on getting my muscles built up and building a body I want to have the rest of my life. And even though I wasn't in onederland like I hoped, she said that I really was because I had gained so much muscle this month that I would have been if I hadn't been working out. And working out is much better. So, that was great.
Had my birthday on the 15th and all that week was a blurr because I was at a conference, had the flu, passed out during the demo of my course, got a flat tire on the way to dinner for my birthday and the list goes on. And then I was working crazy hours in order to try to get my deliverable out on Friday. It got done yesterday, so work won't be so crazy. I was 206 on my scale this morning, so I have a couple of pounds to go.
I had my 9 month surgery visit and had good and bad news. Nancy said that I was right where I should be and what a great job I was doing. She also had to get the regular sized pressure cuff to take my blood pressure. Yeahh. And she told me that I was a success story because I was really using my tool. What a great feeling.
Now, for the bad news. I told her that I had some pouch pain and it could be from the vegetables and flax seed I ate on Sunday. She agreed that my pouch was irritated. She put me on liquids for two days and gave me some prescription strength Prevacid. That should help. But, I also have a grapefruit sized hernia on my incision. I was wondering why my stomach was sticking out so much. I guess that will have to be fixed or you won't be able to see my six-pack. She did say that it would mean that the insurance company would probably pay for a tummy tuck, so I might as well go for it. I also have to have an MRI in May to see how my fibroid is doing because I still may need to have a hysterectomy. They might as well go in there and fix it all.
But, even for the pain and the issues, I would not trade this experience for anything. I love the new me.
May 12, 2007
I feel a ton better. The Prevacid has worked wonders. I had to have a barium Xray and then an endocopy. I was afraid they wouldn't know what to do because of my pouch, but everything went great. I dont' have an ulcer or if I did, the Prevacid smoothed it out. I just have to be careful and not eat raw vegetables. Of course, taht is what I crave. How crazy. But I feel great.
I am now under 200 pounds. I was 198 yesterday. However, the bad news is that I ahve lost some muscle. I think due to the crazy diet trying not to have a painful pouch and not eating as much protein. I am focusing heavy on my protein and go back to get my lean muscle measured next Wednesday. Hope it is back to normal.
March 8, 2008
I can't believe that it has almost been a year since I have posted. I am so happy about everything that I guess I have forgotten to think about this site. I am trying to be normal. I had surgery for my fibroid in December, which meant a hysterectomy, but almost a tummy tuck and liposuction. I have a tiny waist with that huge fibroid gone. I am now 187 and still going down. I have really shrunk due to all the missing skin and people talk about my flat stomach. I have been promoted and am really blossoming in my career and everything feels great. I can keep up with the kids, have a ton of energy and look like a normal sized person. I sometimes forget all of the problems that I had. If you are in doubt about having surgery, don't - it is the best thing I have done for me and for my family.