Hey Y'all! Yes, I live in the south. LOL
I've been kicking around this site for months now, so I guess I'll start
journaling...'cause I have a date!!!! October 10th 2006 I'll be switched!! So,
I'm sure it will be good for me to journal...and I know I read dozens of othere
peeps as I did my research...so I hope something here helps you if you are in
the early stages.
I'm "only" 40 and "only" have a BMI of 42, but my body clearly isn't happy with
I have PCOS, and developed prediabetes in the last 6 months.
I have severe sleep apnea, thank God for my CPAP, I was prepared to hate it, but
LOVE it instead. It gave me back some energy and memory.
I have chronic depression, currently take Cymbalta. I usually last about 2 yrs
on a med, then have to switch.
I have NASH (Nonalcoholic Stereohepatitis). If you don't know about this...it's
a complication beyond Fatty Liver Syndrome. The body stores fat in the liver and
it causes scaring that looks like an alcoholic's liver. And yes, it can progress
and cause liver failure, or the need for a transplant.
Hyperlipidemia...with meds, my triglycerides are "only" 400. Premeds they were
1000+. Can you say stroke?
Joint and back pain...my low back starts screaming at me when I walk more than
100 yards or so...and I have a partially torn Achilles tendon that just burns
So, Do I want to feel better? You betcha!
I am married to Jon, a WONDERFUL man. We have 2 kids. Katie, 9 and Robbie, 6.
Both are adopted, and we were so blessed to be there to witness the birth of
My infertility and the meds I took to overcome it were a great influence on my
poor health now. I took several fertility drugs, and the weight kept packing on.
After 2 years of temp taking, tests, and surgeries, I had not ovulated even
once. (Don't even get me started on insurance again...they paid NOTHING!)
Bless my husband. He rescued me from my feelings of failure when he reminded me
that the goal was to have a family, not necessarily to get pregnant.
K&R are wonderful! And trying, frustrating, noisy...in other words, healthy
Luck WAS shining on us in that SC is THE place to be to adopt...we are the
teenage pregnancy capital of the country, after all.
Jon has a large family and GREAT parents. His mom is a true friend to me. I just
hate that they all live in MI, so far away.
I treasure them all the more because, As Jon puts it, am the orphan of orphans.
LOL. Not really, but both my parents are only children, so I have no aunts,
uncles or cousins. All of my grandparents have been gone for 10-25 years. My
sister, Shelly, died of Lymphoma when I was 3. She was 7.
Her death, while I don't remember it, finished off any chance my family had for
potential happiness. My parents turned away from each other. My Dad began to
travel for work...and relief. My Mother is mentally ill. She was a rage-filled
mess striking out wherever she could. Usually I was the only one there. Mostly
her assaults were verbal. Adding to the isolation was her low vision...she is
legally blind and can't drive. In my teen years, my Dad made it my "job" to be
her transportation. The forced time together was not a good thing.
Anyway, she hated for me to cry...so I learned to stuff my feelings down with
food. I didn't know then about her mental illness. I just couldn't figure out
how to keep the emotional rug from being pulled out from under me when I least
At my first opportunity, I RAN! Went to college 500 miles away and loved it.
Started a career, but family beckoned. I came back, of my own free will, to
become my Dad's business partner. That was 17 years ago. He just retired, we
were great partners and eventually friends. He now understands the severity of
what he left me to deal with as a teen, and is very sorry. I can easily forgive
him, knowing he did the best he could.
I have limited contact with my mom. My choice, not hers. She can still "get to
me", but much less now than before. I have forgiven her too, but can't totally
trust her. The only one who doesn't understand she is mentally ill is her. But
now that my parents are divorced, she is less angry and has fewer bad days.
The benefits of the 3 years of intensive counselling I did are still paying off.
Without that help, I wouldn't have been able to sustain a healthy marriage, have
an honest relationship with my Dad, and ever have a hope of being a good parent.
MY FIRST WLS CONSULT...
...was over a year ago. The other patients in the class kept talking about
ObesityHelp.com and how great it was. I had done NO research other than finding
this surgeon through a friend who had an RNY with him and sung his praises. I'm
sure the man is technically brilliant, but his personality left me cold. Frozen.
He went "off" on a lecture to me that I had to quit smoking at least 6 months
prior to surgery and that I had to be completely nicotine free that whole time
(no patches, gum etc), as he would do blood tests. Furthermore, he made it clear
that he "would not waste his time or talent" on a smoker. He asked why he should
waste surgery on someone who was continuing another killing habit.
OK OK, fine. I figured I would have to quit smoking, already. But I choose NOT
to have a doctor who is that self-righteous! Gee, didn't he think I might have
been a little afraid of quitting...gaining more weight...damaging my liver
further? Yes, I will quit. But only when I have a surgery plan, with a surgeon I
actually like, in place.
...I stuck my head in the ground, ostrich-style, for many months. Finally I came
here to ObesityHelp.com and started reading...lurking...and eventually posting.
The info and support I've found here has been beyond wonderful!
I've headed off on tangents twice. First convinced "this" doctor would be right.
Then "that" doctor. THEN I actually REresearched and discovered what I really
NEED and want is the DS. Things have really zoomed since, and no more tangents.
I found the best Dr. near me (3 hrs) who does the DS Lap...GREAT! It will cost
$35,000! Nooooo...NOT great.
Then, with everloving thanks to the posts on the DS board...I realized that
maybe Mexico or Brazil would be worth looking into.
OH YEAH!! Can you say less than HALF the US expense?!! AND well-qualified,
caring surgeons? Sign me up!
I really thought my conservative, quiet husband would lose it when I brought up
Brazil. The concept of surgery alone was a lot for him to deal with. He doesn't
want to lose me. But he knows how awful I feel, so he's been supportive.
Much to my surprise, he says, in all seriousness, "Did you check out Malaysia or
India, too? There are some very good surgical centers there, I hear."
WHOA Nelly!! Sorry I underestimated you, dear! Guess being married to me for 12
years has loosened you up! Harhar.
So, he's OK, my MIL is OK with the plan, as is my Dad. (Mom won't be hearing
about it!) AND, my friend Lynn, ever on the lookout for adventure, has agreed to
come with me! Jon can take comfort knowing I'll be a post-op for most of the
trip...otherwise, he knows, there's NO telling what kind of trouble she and I
could get into!!