LisaJFox

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Feb 8th was the day of my surgery.  I weighed in at 300 pounds.  I wasn't to nervous, but I was ready to get the show on the road.  School was cancelled due to the weather, so my little girls came up with me to the hospital.  I think they were somewhat scared.  Finally around 130pm, i was being wheeled into the operating room.  I started breathing in that gas..and that was it.  I woke up in recovery...moaning and feeling like i had been run over by a truck.  The nurse kept telling me to take deeper breaths (sure my stats were low)  so i followed instructions.  I kept drifting in and out of it.  I got wheeled into my room on 5west around 4pm.  My family came with me, and the girls were feelin better because I had made it out of surgery.  However, I was NOT A HAPPY CAMPER.  I think the morphine wasn't helping me and i had terrible pains in my upper back.  I couldn't get comfortable whatsoever.  I was irritated to say the least.   My sister rubbed my back really hard and that seemed to help. I had great nurses, and the hospital stay was wonderful.  I did my swallow test, and was released later on that day.  So, I was in the hospital a total of 1 1/2 days. 

I rested at home, and walked around, and did light chores just to keep myself busy.  I don't like to just "lay" around.  I didn't have any hunger pains, and I got most of my fluids and vitamins in.   I started adding protein to my diet on the 18th.  I can tolerate alot.  The only issue i seem to have right now, is some pain on the left side of my stomach.  I think it's normal, and I just take some tylenol and it seems to help some with the pain.  I go back to work on the 22nd, and i have to say i can't wait.  Perhaps, if the weather was better, I wouldn't be so happy, but I don't like just sitting at home.   I weighed this morning and i'm down to 280.  YEAH...I haven't weighed that in forever!! 

I don't know where to even start.  I switched jobs in October of 2009, and I have new insurance.  In December I submitted to the insurance company, and my new insurance approved it within a week.  I am dumbfounded and scared.  I was so used to being "rejected" I was really stunned when I was approved.  Of course, I still need the surgery more than ever.  I'm realtively healthy for someone my size.  I have borderline hypertension and that is it. 

I started the liquid diet on the 25th, I weighed 303.  It was a real struggle, dealing with how much one relies on food.  I'm doing alot better on the liquid diet, but i've struggled with terrible headaches.  It's  currently the 2nd of feb and i've lost 7 pounds on the liquid diet part.  My surgery is scheduled for FEB 8th.  I'm so excited and nervous.  I just keep thinking, I'll be able to ride bikes, with my daughters, play fall softball, things i would always like to do, but haven't because of my weight.  Of course, I will love shopping for cute clothes.  I would love advice or encouragement from people.  I haven't been on this site for awhile...but would love to know what to expect...ect from other post op people.  Keep the faith!!!

Well, it's been awhile since i've visited the site and updated.  I completed doctor Sutmellor's 6 month supervised diet, however, i did not lose the 10 percent needed in order to submit to insurance.  I don't know if going the gastric bypass route is even an option for me any longer.  I am frustrated with insurance and frankly tired of dealing with meeting all of the requirements, and then getting denied.  I love my job, but i dont' think switching insurance would help.  So,...i think i'm giving up on the gastric bypass.

On a more positive note, since i believe gastric bypass isn't an option for me I decided to get my butt moving and eat healthy.  I started on Dec 1st with my mom and everyday we work out on our lunch break and watch what we eat.  I started out at 316  yeah my highest weight ever...  with measurements of 49 1/2 bust 48 waist and 61 inch hips...yeah i got a big ass and hips.  We've decided to weigh every monday and measure ourselves on the 4th of every month to document our progress.  as of last monday I've lost 14 pounds.  So, i'm trying to stay postive and just do what i can do.  Hopefully, i will get healthier and acheive weight loss thru strictly following an exercise and eating right lifestyle.  I can say before i gave up after a week and so far i've lasted 21 days...so i hope this is my lifestyle change i continue to follow.  I wish everyone Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. 

Well, it's been awhile since i've updated.  I have not had the surgery.  I have been attending a required 6 months doctor visits, that my Mercy insurance wants me to complete.  That will be up in April.  I need to lose the required 10percent or i will be denied...so i'm trying to stay focused on that.  Mercy insurance is just horrible.  I think even if i do all that is required, i will be denied again again and again.  I don't know if anyone can give me advice on this or not..but i'm thinking of taking a another full time job for the county, where there insurance is easier to get the surgery.  I just don't know if i can have two full time jobs, and insurance from two different companies.  Any thoughts on that??

My children are getting big.  My youngest will be 3 soon, and my oldest is 6.  She is doing well in school, and is losing her baby teeth...awwwwwww    now if only i can get my youngest to go to bed...i swear she will not sleep for anything...

my dating life sucks.  I have finally severed ties with a guy i was seeing off and on. it's just not worth it anymore.  I just need to take time for myself and concentrate on getting this surgery thing done.  i'm tired of being fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, today i finally got some answers from my bariatric office.  I finally sent a letter to the nurse cordinator (via email) and said if i wasn't dealt with today i would file a formal complaint, that their customer service was boredering on utter riduclousness.  Wow, imagaine that i got a response back in 20 minutes after sending the email.  Apparently, with my insurance (mercy) i have to go on a special diet.  I will have to meet with a physical therapist, a nutritionist, and a doctor every monday for 6 months.  I guess, this is a new "admendment to their weight loss clause"   it's just a bump in the road...and who knows i might lose some weight along the way.  I will have to redo all of the things again, but if i want the surgery bad enough, i will jump through the hoops.   so, i will update every monday on my progress and see how things go.  i just know i'm sick of being fat...and i also know i that i don't hold myself accountable for the reasons why i'm fat.   like this morning...did i really need a cream horn? naw....but i ate the thing anyway.   I understand this surgery is not a quick fix, that you have to deal with your food issues..and i think this new requirement will make me do that.   Other than this weight battle life is pretty good. 

First of all...i will warn everyone this blog is a bitch session...

how the hell can i be on a low carb slimfast diet and eat just fruits and veggies besides the shakes...and gain seven fucking pounds???  i just don't understand this weight issue i have.  i have been really good on this diet for a month..and i weighed myself and i fucking gained 7 pounds...so if my surgeon magically called and said i could have the surgery i would be turned away, because i weigh more than my seminar weight....how great is that....

on sept 4th i was denied anyway.  so i keep trying to call charolette at dr. scotts office...and ya knwo what she can kiss my ass, i've left 5 messages with her, and yet to receive a call back.   very poor customer service, in my opinion.  i've also called my insurance people..but all i get is that i have to get with my dr's office insurance person to see wha ti need to submit to get reconsidered...guess what hte stupid bitch never calls me back....

really i'm not this mean, but i keep gaining weight an di'm sick of it..  i mean i even exercised and all that jazz...i'm just so frustrated i'm ready to just go on a liquid fucking fast and eat no food at all....but guess what i'll probably gain weight on that kind of diet.  okay i'm done...i'm just stressed out and i'm just so fed up with the hoops you have to jump thru to get this surgery.  i bet if i had fucking 30,000 dollars in cash, i could have surgery tomorrow morning or next week...maybe mortgaging my house is something is hould consider....i need thoughts...so send them my way

By the way...still no word from Joshua..so i've given up.. if he calls me again which i think he won't  i will tell him to go to hell.  Anyway, on to something more fun.  My oldest daughter, Emilia, will start school for the first time in 14 days.   My sister, me, and my mom took her down to the Lake outlet store, about an hour and half from where we live to do some serious shopping!!  First we hit the Target store down there.  Emilia is so funny.  She looked around, liked this, didn't like that.  Fell in love with a purple skirt and shirt.  Which we got!!  After picking some stuff out it was on to the dressing room.  I may be a big girl, but emilia is tall lean.  She goes in the dressing room with her MiMI and starts to try on clothes, she gets all excited and comes out and models, a dress she likes, we get it. She tries on other clothes and has a lot of "keepers" and a few no keepers.  I finish paying at Target and my youngest daughter, Myla, is pushing her baby stroller thru target with her Ribbet Ribbet in it (a baby frog) people look at her and smile, she smiles back her big goofy smile and says in her cute 2 year old voice  "HI"  so darling...but i don't want to label her, but she might be just might be my "sneakin out girl" the daughter i end up losing hair over, and wearing the carpet thin...waiting for her to return home... Myla is so sweet, but can be so sneaky sometimes.  I guess time will tell.  The next store we hit is Lane and Bryant at the outlet mall.  I get some jeans, and a shirt that's sexy (i'm going to see TI, T-Pain, Llyod, ciara, and young Joc on August 11th.  I'm totally psyched about that concert.  Anyway, then we go to carters outlet, and Emilia "emme" sees some stuff, and trys on things...and says random statements.  I love the color blue, but i'm not crazy about pink, or purple.  I love these shirts...that shirt looks crazy...no way would i wear that.  I swear, she's a fashion diva in the making.  It's funny to hear my mom say.....she's worse than you girls were when it comes to clothes shopping.  The next was the Osh Kosh outlet.  They were having a huge sale there.  I got alot of cute short sleeved shirts for 2 dollars.  By this time Myla is starting to twirl her hair, and get a big cranky.  Plus it's getting close to 90 degrees out...even this big girl thought about being in a pool LOL...anyway, we finish up shopping and head back home.  We stop at chili's for some lunch and on the way back home, we stop at Old navy's i got some short sleeved shirts, and a pair of shoes...to go with my concert outfit. and finally we arrived at home.  all in all I had an excellent shopping and bonding time with Emilia.  She got a little bit of an attitude..but my sister and I are quick to put her in check.  I am also glad because i'm on a much needed vacation from work.  so rest and relaxation...is what i'mg onna be doing. 

Saturday finally came, and i got ready for my date with Joshua.  He called at 3pm, just to make sure the date was still on.  I was like of course, i will see you at 5pm.  I have to say, i looked very cute.  I called him at 5pm, to let him know i was close to his apt, but needed directions to the exact location, i stayed on the phone with him and saw him waving.  I hung up the phone and went to  meet him.  My heart was beating fast, and i was extremely excited that this date was finally happening.  We went to his apt and watched a little TV and talked for about 30 minutes.  We then decided to eat Chinese food, and see a movie.  As we were getting ready to leave his apt, he layed a big kiss on me.  I liked it.  So, we went and ate chinese, conversation was good and he persuaded me to try crawfish and crab legs..i must admit, they were both very good.  Oh, he also opened the doors for me.  Another plus.  After dinner we go to see Chuck and Larry.  A very funny movie.  I recommend it!!!!  We laughed and had a good time.  I like him, but something seemed a little off, but i'm keeping an open mind.  We went back to his apt and made out a little bit, kissing and such.  He said he would call me and i kissed him on the cheek and drove home.  He walked me to my car and gave me another peck, and off i went.  I was smiling like a dork, but i thought overall i had a really nice time.  However, i'm also asking myself...do you have to have a spark right away, or does it come eventually??  I will continue on my dating quests, and i know i may have to go on alot of dates, before my prince charming comes..but i know he will come.  I will go out with Joshua if he asks me.  I will keep everyone updated... oh and on the weight loss surgery it looks like maybe the end of August for me.  Keep the fingers crossed.  Love and Hugs. 

Josh called me yesterday at 7:30pm.  I was in the middle of grocery shopping, so i asked if i could call him back in an hour.  I called him back at  8:55pm didn't want to seem to eager..lol anyway i got his voice mail...a little bummed, but i left a cute message.  He called me back at 10:15pm and apolgized for  not getting my call.  I made light of the situation  and said it was okay, i'm sure you didn't mean to miss it on purpose.  He then explained that he's been extremely tired, because he's been going into work at 3:45am and working until 3:15pm basically 14 hour days.  I completely understood why he was so tired.  Keep in mind we work at the same place, so i know what it's like working alot of hours.  So, we talked on the phone for 30 minutes.  He said some nice things to me...he liked how i was open minded, nice and a sweet person, he also said in his cute african accent.. that i look goood....lol he made my day.  :)  i'm still gonna have the surgery..no matter what.. i will always have my ass and boobs...i never lost them when i lost weight before...so we talked about going out on a date...drum roll......the date is Saturday evening at 5pm.  I'm thinking we could do something fun.  bowling, see a movie..a walk in the park... i'm gonna take a different route with Joshua.  I will have to resist my strong urge to jump his bones...girls the guy is adorable.. and just take things slow and see where they go.  I know i can't be having sex and all that...cuz who wants to keep a girl around that gives it up so easy...right or wrong????  so  let me know what ya'll think.  i'm so excited!!!!!!!!!!

Well, i have some exciting news!!! I gave my phone number out to this cute guy at work.  I figured, i would have to do it sooner or later, and I really had a connection with him, so i just  did it.  A day passed, and toward the 2nd eveing i was getting a little sad, because he hadn't called, but guess what at 9:50pm my cell phone rang and it was him!!! I have to tell you a bit about him.  He is orginally from Ghana Africa, and is 32 has the most beautiful smile, i've ever seen (when i first met him, i thought about his smile for two days) and he is just a generally nice guy.  I love listening to his accent.  Anyway, he knows how i look now, and i haven't mentioned having surgery or anything, but i figured if he likes how i look now, then it's not a bad thing.  I will still have the surgery, but i would feel weird dating a guy that didn't know i used to be fat.  Because then you have the whole...okay i've lost weight i look hot, but would this guy date me if i was fat, or would he stay if i gained it all back??? Weird to be thinking about, but it does cross my mind.  Does anyone else out there understand what i'm saying??  Anyway, this cute guy, his name is Josh, and i hope he calls me in the next couple of days, because i would like to set up a date with him.  My daughters will be visiting their dad this weekend, so it would be perfect timing!!!!  Anyway...i'm secretly inside going YESSSSSSSSSSS THE FAT GIRL GOT THE GUY TO CALL HER!!  I guess as you age, you have more confidence fat or small, and just decide...hey there might be something therie.  So, i will keep everyone updated on Josh and go from there... and i'm sooooooooo glad he's not a LOSER like all the other guys i dated in the past.