Gettin back on track

Jul 23, 2012

It's been a long time since I have been here.  I have gained 50#, and I have felt like such a failure.  It was as if a steam roller had run over me and I couldn't control it.  I had such a bad experience with True Results, and Dr. Benavedis's office kept sending me back to them.  Not to mention, the two hours down and back and having to get a sub. for that time off -- not good with my new principal.  Anyway, I was totally out of control.  

We took students to Washington, D.C. two weeks ago, and one of the moms on the trip told me about having had lap-band surgery in April.  I explained my problem(s) to her, and she referred me to her surgeon.  I called as soon as we got back and had my records transferred to him.

We met yesterday.  Standing on the scale was liberating to me because I felt like I was taking control of myself and my weight.  Dr. Kureshi was wonderful.  He doesn't "farm" people out to after-care centers; he sees all of his patients every month.  He even does the fills himself.  He said that my after-care left a lot to be desired.  He feels that seeing his patients once a month allows for accountability.  Now, I am not blaming my weight gain on the anyone else -- I put everything into my own mouth.  Obviously, I have a problem with food or I wouldn't have gotten the band in the first place. 

I had a fill yesterday -- up to 6.8 ccs -- and I am not lamenting the weight that I have gained, but rather I am looking forward as a way to getting back on track and living my life.  I have learned to "never say never" because "never" does happen.  I am not sure what the future holds, but I am sure that I have to assume more responsibility for myself and my actions.  OH was a great help to me when I initially had my surgery, and I am hoping that it will be again.

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