Christin S.

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if you'd like to contact me via email its

[email protected], same address for Yahoo IM.  I will catch up with everyone as soon as I feel better.

I'm sorry I've been absent for a while.  Things have really been busy.  Didn't mean to worry my friends here.

First of all, I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis yesterday, April 12.  It puts so many things together now, making sense.

My weightloss has completely stalled thanks to me not working out anymore.  I think I mentioned it before by I was hurt in a work accident where I slipped on ice.  My knee was hurt actually, making things not very easy for me.  I hope that this is over with soon and I can go back to the gym.  Its more important than ever, with the MS diagnosis.

Currently, I'm 216 lbs.  I only have 15 lbs left to make it to the 100lb mark, where I wanted to be.  I'm wearing a size 16 pants now and a size 18-20 in shirts.  I still HATE tight shirts.  Bra is a 40D, but I'm already wearing some brands that are 38D.

With this MS diagnosis, I also found out that my throat spasms I had shortly after my RNY were due to the stress from the surgery.  I haven't had another episode in a while, but I DID have eye problems very recently.

In other news, I'm taking a motorcycle safety riding course, was supposed to be DONE last weekend, but due to horrible weather, we're hoping to finish it up tomorrow and Sunday. I will then get my motorcycle endorsement and start that chapter.  Of course, I won't rid as much or at all when I go through treatment and exacerbations.  But no more slowing down.  And I can swing my leg over the motorcycle :)

Hubby is continuing on his weightloss as well. He's close to the 100 lbs lost mark, only 4 more lbs to go!  He too has slowed down with his working out, all due to the fact that I was sick and he's taking care of me.

Eating.... we've made some bad choices the last few days.  You pay for those by feeling horribly sick, but the comfort that a 'healthy' pizza gives you.... I know this will soon be over with as well.

Initially I was going to have plastic surgery done on my tummy and boobs, but at this stage right now, not sure how this will affect the MS disease. 

I promise to stop in more often.... :)

Lots of things have been happening.  All of them really health related.

The end of January I got the devastating news that my brain tissue is dying.  They are not sure why, but in comparison of an MRI taken in 2005 and the one in January, there is significant change (death) in my brain.  I've done a lot of research to find out what can be done about it.  I also stumbled across the disaster of Chernobyl in 1986.  I was born and raised in southern Germany and I do remember the disaster very well.  Lots of our pets died a few days after the cloud arrived in our area.  It was devastating.  I also remember that since we were pretty poor, that fresh produce was cheap from the farmers for a long time.  And yes, we ate it. When you're poor, a disaster like that comes in handy because they can't sell their stuff to the 'normal' population.

I have a neuro appointment on March 8 where I will discuss these changes and see if we can figure out what the culprit is.

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I had chocolate treat (brownie) for the first time since surgery.  Last weekend to be exact.  It tasted good, but I paid dearly for it.  I was in the bathroom and it came out BOTH ends.  I thought that I would die right there on the toilet.  Horrible.  I learned a lesson.  I tolerate dark chocolate well actually, but I dislike it.  So, I guess its a win-win situation.
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I'm finally under 220.  I can't wait until the day I'll see 199.  I'm losing weight at about 2 lbs a week.  Normal weightloss of course, which is good, because now I know that I no longer lose muscle.  Skin is of course plentiful.  At first I thought I would not have the surgery to get rid of my tummy skin, but the more I progress, the more I KNOW I'll have the surgery.  I've been obese (not just overweight) since about age 14.  That's more than 20 years of carrying that extra skin.  I know its not going to shrink on its own.  We'll see
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The volume I'm eating has increased.  I'm up to about 2 cups AT THE MOST.  The difference is I'm making good choices now.  I'd rather eat an apple than something loaded with bad carbs.  I don't even like the taste of most of the bad things anymore.  Ok, I did have a COKE the other day (half a glass) and it tasted soooo good.  I didn't dump from it, but I looked at it as a special treat.  I don't crave it like I used to, so its good.

I've become sooo aware of what I eat and take in. 

We tried fast food.  Wendy's to be exact.  Hamburger on lettuce.  GROSS!  The hamburger tasted like I just shoved pure FAT into my mouth, couldn't stand it.  Not to mention that it caused me dump... only the few bites I took caused BIG stomach upset.  So, we're cured of the fast food wish.
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I got injured at work, slipped on ice in the parking lot and now I'm not allowed to return to the gym for a little while longer.  It will be tough returning to the gym once the injury to my knee has healed.  I'm out of shape!
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That's about it.  Took my 6 months pictures (see in photos) and I'm impressed myself.  I remember the first 2-3 months being the toughest, now its changed my life.  Indeed a great tool!

My darling hubby, who had the surgery 10 weeks after me, has surpassed me by 1 lb!!!!  Why do men loose faster?  I know why, but it still sucks!!!  Ok, I'm happy for him, but of course I want my weight loss to speed up.

Skin is REALLY starting to sag.  I'm so glad I'll get a tummy tuck, but I also realize I need to save for a breast lift, and possibly some additional tucking.  Not something I'm looking forward to.

Hair loss is STILL continuing for me as well.  I didn't realize I had this much hair that could be lost. 

Bra size is now at 38D.  ALL of my bras are too big.  I wore a 46 forever it seems. 

I'm knitting myself a nice 'sweater/jacket' that will hopefully deal with this 'cold-feeling' that has been going on since the surgery. 

My shoe size is now again at 8.5.  I wore a 9 or 9.5 for a long time it seems.  At the rate this is going, I wouldn't be surprised if I go back to being an 8, the size I was as a teenager.  I honestly didn't think that I'd lose sizes when it comes to shoes!!!!

I'm scheduled for my first mammogram this Tuesday.  Yikes.  I hope it will be normal and nothing to worry about.

Hubby is suffering from depression.  He's working on pulling himself out of this by himself.  I hope it will work.  Otherwise I'm dragging him to go and see someone professional.

I took pain meds a while ago for the horrible backache I have. We went bowling yesterday and lets just say, I'm paying the price today.  I guess having a herniated disc doesn't make much difference on the pain even if you lose weight.

That's all :)

I finally made it under 230.  The scale showed 228 yesterday morning.  I was amazed by it myself.  After no loss for about 10 days I think, it finally moved again.  So, if you look up, you will see that I'm past the halfway point.

Hubby is catching up to my loss.  he's lost 69 lbs, and I'm 10 wks ahead.  I know it has to do with him being male and him working out more than I am, but it still makes me envious.

I have an appointment on Monday morning to see an ENT doc.  I hope he can give me some insight with this throat spasm thing.  The more stress, the more it starts to act up.  I had to dose up for my test, because I thought I was going to choke the days leading up to it. 

This is something that is really affecting me... the whole throat thing.  I hope they can figure out something better than taking Lorazepam. 

Well, better get back to knitting on my sweater. Can't express how happy I am to knit something 'smaller' and its for ME!

Hard to believe, we're already in 2007.  Soooo many things have changed in my life, the best was this surgery.  I still suffer from the throat spasms and they become quite strong the more stressed out I get.  It seems I traded migranes for throat spasms.  I hope that when I see my doctor this coming week, I can get some referrals to specialists.  'Prayer' isn't for me as my surgeon suggested his sister-in-law helps these spasms.  He leaves it at that, which I'm VERY upset about.  It affects my daily life.  I quit my last job because I couldn't handle the stress and unhappiness there anymore, the spasms were too bad.  But I don't regret the surgery.

We went out New Years Eve for the first time in MANY years to a club!  We are taking up dancing lessions this month as well.  Hopefully we can learn so we can go out dancing.  I know I'll have issues because I naturally lead.  Ooooops.

Bought these chips from Whole Foods market.  A bag cost $16!!!!  We had a few with homemade chili/bean dip and boy, its addicting.  I need to watch out. But thankfully I can only eat a small amount and that lasts for while before i get hungry again.

The new job is doing well, I'm glad I switched jobs, but I need to pass an insurance license exam this Friday or I'll lose my job.  No pressure there right?  Of course it shows on my physical symptoms.

I'm joining the gym at work for $10/2wks.  Yes, we belong to Bally's now too, but its on the other side of town, and this allows me to get to work on time, then work-out.  If there is a traffic problem, I can skip working-out until dinner time and I won't get in trouble by being absent.  A great solution.  And the people are extremely nice in there.

I need to look into getting a different scale sometime.  I stepped on the scale this morning and it showed 230.7.  So, I took my clothes off and it showed 230.7.  I stepped on it a few more times, different angles and shifting the weight either forward or back and still 230.7.  Something isn't right there.  I should weigh MORE with my clothes on!!!!  At least that's what I think.

Weigh in is not until Fridays for me anyway, so if I still weight 230.7 on Friday, I think I need to get a new scale.  

Well, its almost midnight and time to go to bed.  Another stressful week ahead, but I'm trying my best to deal with the stress.

I've got a lot of compliments today.  And I think that its because I'm wearing once again smaller clothes.  My pants size is 18 now with a great comfy fit, my shirt size is 18-20 with a tad bit tight on some shirts, but the majority is a good fit.  I'm wearing that today.

I noticed that my body is shrinking big time now when looking at it.  Its amazing.  I never thought that I would be able to cross my legs like a slim woman.... that I would be able to fit into a chair without touching the sides.... that I would be able to buy something sexy without worries that some fat could hang over and would look gross (to me).  Its an awesome change and I feel myself changing inside as well.

I realized that some 'friends' are no longer really in my life.  I did mourn that this weekend, but have moved on. I realize now that I am someone that deserves true friends, I don't need to continue to run after them.  

People smile at me, I smile back. I hold eye contact and not worry if they're looking at my fat face or something else.  

I can put my laptop on my legs and type!!!!!

I can go up 2 flights of stairs WITHOUT getting winded.

I can bend over and touch the floor (before I was only able to reach my feet).  

I can fit through tight areas without asking someone to please move.

I see myself in the mirror and realize I'm beautiful.  Not just getting there physically, but also inside, my heart and soul.  It was hidden behind insecurities and fat.

I realize I am regressing in age.  I FEEL like I'm 20, not 36.  I want to do things now.  I plan on learning to ski next season, if not this year (we'll have to see financially how that will work).


So much is changing, my life, my work, my attitude, my love, my passions.

I feel excited every morning to get started in life.

I no longer have the same pains I had when I was morbidly obese.

My BMI is now at 36.3.  When I started this 4 months ago, it was nearly 48.  A BIG difference.

I haven't really thought of my mother and siblings this season.  Its all about me, Rich, our pets and friends.  With the fat that I've shed, I also realized that I've been shedding my upbringing in many ways.  I have strength to say no to junk food, to comfort foods such as chocolate, etc. because I DEAL with my issues now.  Every now and then I realize that I'm about to fall back into a bad habit, then I get my act together and realize that I'm a strong person, I don't need food to conquer problems.

Life is beautiful, even with all the stress of work and losing 'friends'.  Life goes on.... and I'm finally in the process of enjoying it.

It has been an extremely busy week.  I left my old job and started my new job.  In training now and its TOUGH.  I need to obtain a professional license within 2 weeks and take the test next Friday, the 22nd.  I've been suffering again from the stupid throat issue that I had post-op wk 4.  I realize its all stress related, but its tough to deal with.

Darling husband got me another kitten for Christmas. I'm in love :)

Still stopped by my old job on Thursday and Friday to help train the new person.  NOT an easy task.  I work until 10 pm now (from 1 pm on) and while its NICE to be off in the morning, its also tough when you have to get up, and go to your old job to train your replacement.  I made that comittment before knowing that the first 2 weeks of training was purely studying and pass to get a license.  My job depends on it.  I feel completely overwhelmed.

Yesterday I gave in to that feeling and ate chicken without watching how much I ate.  I paid the price by throwing it all back up right before going to bed.  Great.... I really need to keep an eye on it.

Time to go to the gym is not available until I pass this test.  I NEED to go as I'm slowing down with the loss but also skin is started to really sag.  My boobs.... well, they do too and its not pretty. I keep reminding myself that I'll have that fixed, but still......

I need to get going....

Its Sunday and for the first time since my RNY surgery I had something 'sweet'.  Being from Germany, there are many Christmas traditions and one is to bake and eat Christmas Stollen.  I found one that was made with wheat, instead of regular white flour and they used little sugar, mostly substitute.  Big difference.

I had some a while ago, along with some mullen wine (Gluehwein in German).  Of course not together, but I did have a tiny bit.  It felt good but also brought back lots of memories.  Not necessarily good ones, but I focus on the good ones.

My weight is now around 235.  Next weigh in is on Tuesday morning.

I had another trip to the military ER on Thursday afternoon.  Severe pain in my right side, they gave me IV fluids, Phenergan to combat the nausea and sent me home because my bloodtests didn't show anything.  No xray, no CT to ensure there isn't anything wrong.... typical treatment in a military facility.  I wonder why I bother.

I felt better the next day, but tired and run down really.  Alot of it has to do with my job.  Or should I say old job?  I left the company I worked with on Friday and will start my new job on Monday.  Shift work.  I'll be working from 1 pm to 10 pm.  But at least from now on I can make doctor's appointments and not worry about getting in trouble at work. I also get paid 13.44/hr compared to 11.50/hr before. 

That comes out to $24000/yr then and $28062/hr now.  Makes a big difference.  Plus I have gainsharing options, more vacation/sick time, etc.  And possibility for overtime, which gets paid 1.5 more.

I also have to work ONE holiday a year.  I don't have a problem with that.

Hubby bought me a new computer for Christmas.  Dell has 18 months without interest, and that's not a problem then. :)

It should arrive before Christmas.  Now I need to figure out a new table arrangement. 

Well, that's it for the update. I'm doing ok, going through a headcold right now, probably got that at the hospital waiting room the other day.

I won't be able to attend support groups anymore as my shift schedule simply won't allow it.  I think I have to figure out a different way to find support with real live people.  We'll see.

Took our holiday picture today.  For the first time I'm not ashamed to put it on a card and send it to family.  I wonder what my picture will look like next season.........