Not so happy new year!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jan 16, 2009

Hello everyone,  i hope everyone is enjoying there new year. As 08 ended for me I thought that 09 was gonna start off great> Well sad to say it has started off in the wrong direction. I would like to start by saying that any and all support is greatly appreciated. However please hold on to your judgement. I dont like to air my dirty laundry but at this point I feel like I have to take it off my chest and express my self. I have been married for 12 years and we have had our ups and downs like all marriages do. However for the past 4 years my marriage has taken turns and twists i rather not have to deal with. As of this month I have decided to file for divorce and move on with my life. I have 3 children I have to think about and this relationship has pretty  much left me feeling like its not worth fighting for anymore. Hubby is not to happy that I filed and is trying to do everything possible for me not to proceed but my mind has been made up. This is causing so much stress right now that somedays i just wanna give up but that is not an option. Im gonna be strong and stay focused on the storm that lies ahead of me. Its a long story of how shit began and why its fallen apart so i wont go into details. Let me also say, cuz peepz always ask..Losing weight or the surgery has nothing to do with this.  Although I will say that hubby has made comments like: "I liked you betta when u were bigger" WTF?? why? bcuz i settled for BS cuz i was miserable about everything...hell na...life is too short to live miserable and i plan on living a long, happy,healthy life even if it means i'll be alone- Well enough about my marriage.....

Also for the past week I have been feeling like shit . Just when I think that im doing great and glad i had no complications something comes up....i have been out of surgery now 1 year and 5 mo's this week i have lost almost 3 pounds so i weigh about 116 or so- andall of a sudden this week i have been having terrible, crippling pain in my upper stomach area. On monday it hurt but didnt think much of it. On tuesday I was at work and had to leave to the  ER, needless to say docs were  not able to find any thing wrong and sent me home. Wednesday again only this time it seems the pain was worse than before, again to ER and still nothing was found. Then OMG>>>Thursday night as I was ready to go to bed I began to feel the burning sensation in my stomach and then the PAIN....It lasted almost 2 hours before I decided to go to ER again, the pain was unbearable, I couldnt stand, speak or move for that matter. As I get to the hospital- im short of breath, my skin is pale, my pain is at an all time high and i cant walk- Nurses hook me up to every possible machine. I spent the night and all of Friday in the hospital= I was on oxygen, IV, EKG monitor, I had pelvic exams, rectal exams, 3 MRI and 2 chest xrays, they did an ultrasound on my bladder, i had to drink 3 bottles of bariatic sulfate so they can then give me the ink contrast for the mri's. Took so  many urine and blood samples im suprised im still alive. I had extreme low blood pressure, Heart rate dropped supa low  and i was in and out of sleep, plus them feeding me vicodin didnt help the drowsiness- So after all the possible tests that exist they send me on my happy way home- I am to eat every 3 hours and no exercise--which sucks cuz my coworkers and i run 20 miles on the weekends and i exercise all week at the gym and now im restricted...not cool!!! and still they could not find out what the hell is wrong with me...WTF?? this pain and bruise that i have above my stomach is obviously not normal then why cant they figure it out. Its a medical MYSTERY I guess-I lost 3 days of work and $250 in ER visits for nothing- Its friday and im home hoping that this pain will not come back- ive been very sleepy and dragging all day...its like a 48 hour high that wont go away..lol....anywayz ....MY BADD i wrote a long ass story- hope i didnt bore yall too much but had to get this shit off of my chest....thanks to the peeps that have supported me so far, I really appreciate it and thanks for reading my soap opera life....till next time....

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About Me
Aurora, CO
Location
23.2
BMI
RNY
Surgery
08/27/2007
Surgery Date
Jul 18, 2007
Member Since

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