Megan K.

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Wow, it's been 5 months since I last posted. Of course a lot has happened so here it goes...

I had my RNY on 5/2/11 and everything went well. I was in the hospital for 2 nights with no complications. I got home, was off of work (desk job) for 3 weeks, then went back at the end of May. I've been back to work ever since and all is going very well. I hit a stall my 2nd week post-op that lasted 3 weeks but I've learned that's normal and just to go with it.

I've lost 41 lbs since surgery and 84 total. I am starting Week 6 of a 9-week running program, I started kayaking and rode 15 miles on my bike yesterday. I haven't gotten sick once but I did get a piece of chicken slightly stuck once. It's all a learning experience, right? Well, I'm still learning.

I gotta say though, this whole thing has been quite a ride so far. I wish everyone health and happiness and I promise I will write again sooner than I did last time.

:)
Megan

I don’t know how I did it since I’ve only been doing my Medifast/Lean & Green diet for less than 3 days but I weighed myself this morning and I had lost 11 lbs in 1 week. I don’t even know how to wrap my brain around that. Sure, it’s either most or all water weight but honestly, I don’t care. I was completely (and still am!) stoked to see 277 (from 302 in Aug 2010) on that scale!

I have my psych eval tomorrow morning so wish me luck. It’s all coming together!

It’s been awhile since I’ve written and basically it’s because I’ve been extremely sick with a nasty cold. I’m doing quite a bit better but can’t totally get rid of this cough yet.

My pre-op testing is coming along. I had a chest x-ray and ultrasound done last week. I was scheduled for pulmonary testing as well but since I was sick they had to reschedule it for the end of Feb. Next up is the psych eval this coming Friday.

The other part of this is losing the weight I have to lose pre-op. 29 lbs total. My surgeon puts you on what’s called a “Lean & Green diet” which can include using Medifast or not, it’s up to you. Basically it’s lean protein and greens for dinner and shakes during the day if you choose the Medifast. If you don’t, you eat the lean meat and greens 3 meals/day. I opted to do my own version of the shakes by using protein powder for the shakes and starting multivitamins. Today is my first day and while I’m happy I’m starting this, I’m not looking forward to the inevitable carb withdrawals over the next couple of days. I love bread so this is going to be a little rough. But it will undoubtedly be worth it.

I will get through it though. The benefits of all this will be SO worth it!

It’s all starting to come together slowly but surely. Well, not that slowly but I am impatient so it’s hard for me to sit and wait for it.
I got all the info today about when my appointments will be. I had an appt with my surgeon’s office last week. I didn’t meet with him but with his staff. I had an EKG done so that’s out of the way. I have all the appts on 1/28 to have an ultrasound, chest x-ray, & nutritionist. I still need to have the psych consult but it all feels like it’s becoming real and not just a far-off fantasy/goal that may or may not happen.

I haven’t been losing weight like I would like but I haven’t been trying like I should either. I have to lose 29lbs before surgery so I’ve got to get my head into it soon. I’m not sure why I haven’t been into it but ever since the holidays it’s been very difficult.
I meet with the surgeon for the first time on 1/18. I’m sure I’ll be nervous about that. I think it will really feel like everything is real at that point.

So, other than that stuff, nothing else is going on. I’m getting a cold so I’m going to completely veg out this weekend and take care of myself. Hopefully I will feel better on 1/18 to go meet with the surgeon.

Have a great weekend everyone!

So here it is, another New Year except this time, it's different.

I know, I know, you have heard that many times either from your friends, the media or even inside your own head. I have too. I'm tired of hearing it, actually. I've been through a lot of these New Year's resolutions and unfortunately, it's always been the same one, to lose weight, which I might add has never come to fruition.

Sure, I've lost a few pounds here and there. Hey, I even lost a whopping 50lbs one time! But alas, I have 150 to lose. I lost the 50 and the idea of losing the rest (at the time would've been around 75) was just too much of a monumental effort in my opinion.

I never believed in weight loss surgery. I never really thought of it as the "easy way out" as so many people on here have been told my their supportive (NOT!) co-workers and (sometimes) family members. No, I actually thought it would be way too much to put my body through. I couldn't imagine voluntarily having major surgery for anything. Ahhh... I was so young and naive.

Now, here I am 2 days away from turning 39. The dreaded 4-0 looming over my head like an anvil in a Looney Toons cartoon. I'm staring down at those numbers that start with 4 with anger, not really dread. I don't want them to come and it's for one reason and one reason only. My mother had her first heart attack at 46. Yup, 46 yrs old. She wasn't anywhere near as heavy as I am but she enjoyed the occasional smoke (well, at least a pack per day if that's occasional) and up until about 8 yrs before, she liked her drink. Yes, I'm not referring to Diet Coke.

So now, here I am. I was just diagnosed as pre-Diabetic and my lovely PA wants to put me on blood pressure meds. I fought that tooth and nail. I said "nope, no way, I ain't gonna do it!" I'm not that person! I can't have Diabetes! I can't be getting Diabetes! I refuse!

I know it's not that easy. You can't just declare you don't have or want something and that makes it true. For all of you out there who love "The Office", you will remember Michael's famous line of declaring bankruptcy. Luckily Oscar set him straight by advising him that just because you declare it, it doesn't mean you've done it.

Anyway, my thoughts have changed completely about WLS, I've done a complete 180 in the past 6 months. I've tried losing weight and yeah, I can but then it comes back with a vengeance, almost like it was mad at me for trying to get rid of it. Then I try again a few months later, maybe trying something new. "Starvation will rid me of this extra poundage forever!" (Yes, I declared it.) But no, it came back, angrier than ever and now it has made a permanent home in, around and on my body. I don't like it one bit and I'm putting up with it NO MORE!

Like I said, drastic times call for drastic measures. I'm getting rid of this fat suit this year. Yup, 2011 has been declared as "Year of the Megan" by myself and my husband. Yes, he agreed to it and for that I am thankful. No more putting up with all the crap I've put up with all my life and no more putting up with this weight that has been weighing me down for almost 34 years. I've had it!

Yes, I want WLS surgery this year. As you can see from my previous blog posts, I've already started this journey. I'm not sure I'm enjoying it so far, as so many people say I should but I'm doing it all the same. I've also decided to let you all in on why I want this surgery. 20 enlightening (ok, not so much but they are true to how I feel) reasons and I'm thinking that a lot of you reading this will agree with at least some items on this list so I'm not holding back. 

Further reading should be done at your own risk. Ok, not really but it sounded serious.

1. Basically, I hate being fat
2. I hate that all of my thoughts about myself are tainted by the fact that I am fat
3. I don't want to compensate for bending over or doing anything physical by leaning a certain way or not doing it at all because I'm fat
4. I want to run. A lot. I want to run a marathon someday and then do the IronMan in Hawaii. I want to bike, swim and run and I know I can. I biked 245 miles during a weeklong bike trip 4 years ago. I trained for it and can do it again.
5. I want to hike up high mountain. I want to not feel like I'm carrying around a person on my back who I don't like
6. I want to dress like a ho. Yup, you read it right. I want to for once in my goddamn life, dress like I'm going out to a club and show some skin and feel great and proud of myself all the while wearing high-heeled boots (something I have NEVER worn) up to just below my knee with a short skirt and look HOT!
7. I want people to notice me for me and not for being fat
8. I want to get a better job and have the self-confidence to try. I'm tired of being stuck in a workplace where there is no chance of advancement
9. I want to not be tired all the time
10. I want to not feel like I'm old all the time
11. I want to buy a little black dress and black high heels and look awesome
12. I want to buy my first bikini and not just buy one or the first one I find. I want to spend hours looking for the perfect 5 and buy all of them and wear them around the house and be proud of how I look!
13. I want to downhill ski again
14. I want to roller skate
15. I want to horseback ride
16. I want to feel SEXY!
17. I want my every thought of every day not to be about hiding myself and wearing clothes that will make me disappear. I want to be better for me and for my husband who deserves better.
18. I want to be happy
19. I want to run into everyone I used to know in my hottest outfit and make them eat their words and thoughts about how they thought I looked before.

20. Last but not least, I've decided that I'm going to take out an obituary in the local newspaper after I've lost all the weight and explain ever so eloquently that the person my ex-husband cheated on has past away but the kick-ass, awesome-looking, strong, beautiful woman has survived!!!!

Happy New Year everyone on OH. I hope all of your hopes and dreams come true.

Luv,
Megan

I have to start out this post by reciting a quote from an episode of the A&E show "Hoarders" I saw last week: "We are all 4-5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket."

This was said by Matt who is frequently on the show as a hoarding specialist and had recently discovered a hoarder knowingly had a homeless man living in his backyard. It just makes you stop and think about how all of our decisions have consequences no matter how big or small. Interesting...

To update last week’s debacle/bumpy road, I was able to find exactly what my insurance company requires for the surgery. It did not include the need for a 5-yr weight loss history nor did it restrict me from seeing a nutritionist for my 6-month diet. I found these requirements by accident but they were on the United Healthcare website so why the heck couldn’t the RN who is supposed to be handling my case, direct me to it? Oh well, from everything I’ve read so far, it’s never easy dealing with the insurance company, especially in this type of situation.

I also have good news that my first meeting with the surgeon is 1/6. This works out well because I have that week off from work. I can’t wait till my vacation! I’m going to do only the things I want to which I have to say is a really great feeling. This is one of the reasons I don’t have kids and I don’t have a problem admitting that. I used to feel bad and think that it was what I was “supposed” to do, to have kids and raise them but you know what? There are way too many kids out there that have crappy lives because their parents didn’t think far enough ahead as to whether or not they really even wanted kids. Besides, I’m going to be 39 in less than 2 weeks and I don’t want to be in my 40’s with a toddler.  I’ve finally come to the realization that it’s ok to be selfish and enjoy what you want to enjoy. I’ve worked hard for a very long time and been through a lot. It’s my time now which works out perfectly with my need to have this surgery. For anyone reading this whom has kids, please don’t look at this as though I am against having kids.  Kids are fine, hey, I used to be one myself but they aren’t fine for my life.

Anyway, eating-wise, this week has been very challenging. It’s that time of the month so I’m craving everything bad anyway but that coupled with Christmas coming is just not a good combo. But, I’m not going to worry about it too much. I’ll be back on the wagon again come Monday so it’s all good.

I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday!

~Megan

I’m doing everything I was told to do. I’ve only been at this about 6 weeks but I’m 150% dedicated now. I’m sure there are many, many others out there and on this site like me but I guess I need to vent. Undoubtedly this will be the first of many during this journey.

I feel like this journey officially started the day I got a call from an RN at my insurance. She went over everything I needed to know and answered any questions I had. One thing that came up was the insurance requirement that I need to have 6 months of supervised dieting documented in the last 2 yrs. I didn’t have this and explained that I was between primary care doctors and hadn’t found a new one yet but in my willingness to start this process, I asked if I could see a nutritionist instead. She said yes.

So, that’s what I’ve been doing since mid-November. I am now on month 2 of the 6-month supervised diet and the surgeon’s office said they don’t think the documentation by a nutritionist is going to work and that it should be by a doctor.

So, I called RN at the insurance. This time, she was very different with me. Not as nice as the first time. She barely spoke. I explained to her that I had talked to her on 11/3 and reminded her what she told me and that I needed what she said about my seeing a nutritionist instead of a doctor in writing. She said she couldn’t give that to me. I asked why not and she said she has it all in her notes and if someone needs to call her to confirm, they can. Great.

Next, I called the surgeon’s office back and they said to try again to get the info in writing and get a copy of the policy and they also think that I need 5 yrs of documented weight loss. What??? 5 YEARS??? Luckily, I work with 2 people in my office who have had the same exact surgery in the last few months with the same exact surgeon. Both women told me they didn’t need the 5 yrs of documentation. Come on! Is this going to be as difficult as this the whole time?

I called the RN at the insurance back but I had to leave a voicemail explaining everything I needed. I haven’t heard back from her. Then I called the surgeon’s office and told them the same thing. The woman there said she would look into it and call me back.

Any support or advice from anyone out there would be VERY appreciated!

~ Megan

I’m feeling good today. I was a little sore from working out this weekend on the elliptical machine but I’m doing better now. I’m going again tonight and I’m really looking forward to it. It’s been great going with my DH. He’s enjoying it too and of course with his own weight loss he’s enjoying the benefits too.

I also had my 2nd appointment with the nutritionist this morning which also went well. I’ve lost 6 lbs according to her scale but I’m learning quickly that all scales are different and all that matters is I’m trying. The nutritionist was very pleased with the loss.

I completed all of the paperwork that was given to me at the seminar last night so that is out of the way. Tomorrow is the day I can call for my first appointment which is great. I can’t wait to get the ball rolling quicker on this but I know I need to be patient since I’m only starting month 2 for the 6 month diet. Well, in reality I will only need to do it for 2 more months after this and then I can start the 10% weight loss the hospital needs me to do.

Have a great day everyone!

~ Megan

The seminar went well on 12/8. A lot of what the surgeon said was stuff I already knew from doing research but there were some really good points as well. I’ve got to admit that my favorite part was when the surgeon said to avoid meat like steak right after surgery because how well it needs to be chewed. All of a sudden this man yells out, “You mean I can’t never have some steak?” I’m sure that was a valid question but it was darned funny all the same.

A lot of my confusion was due to the insurance company and the hospital’s requirements pre-op. As with most bariatric surgeons, the one that was giving the seminar wants you to lose 10% of your body weight right before the surgery. This consists of going on Medifast or a lean and green diet. I was hoping that this part of the requirements could be used in conjunction with the 6 month diet I have been required to be on by my insurance. Luckily, it can.

We were also told at the seminar that the earliest we can call for our first appt is 12/13 after 1pm since this will give them time to go over everyone’s paperwork from the seminar. So, yes, I will be calling them at 1:01pm on 12/13. I am still completely on board with this whole process and look forward to it more than ever.

I am only 1 month into the 6 month diet and it’s already starting to be challenging. Thankfully my insurance doesn’t require a specific amount of weight to be lost prior to surgery. I can feel that I’ve already gained a few #’s back but isn’t that one of the 24,572 reasons I want the surgery? The 17 lbs I had lost so far came off very quickly and was mainly because I wasn’t eating much after I had 2 wisdom teeth extracted on 10/29. But like I said, this is one of the many reasons I want the surgery – I WILL gain the weight back without it.

Anyway, I’m extremely glad it’s Friday and that my vacation/sick/personal time will be replenished at my job on 1/1/11. I’ve been without any time off since 8/10 which really isn’t too long but anytime I’ve had an appt I’ve had to make up the time. I have already signed up for a week’s vacation in January and I can’t wait! I have no plans but I can always find stuff to do. I’m lucky because I get another week of vacation in 2011 because of the length of time I’ve been at my job. So, I will be able to add some of that time to the disability I will be taking after the surgery to receive closer to a full paycheck instead of 60%.

Before I go, I’ve decided that with each blog post I’m going to write a reason as to why I want the surgery and please don’t judge me by my sometimes non-holier-than-thou reasons. This is reason 1,247: I can’t wait to be able to wear a rockin’ pair of beautiful, just below the knee, low-heeled leather boots with leggings and a great top and look awesome!

Happy Friday!

~ Megan

Today is a big day for me. It's the day I go to my seminar. I'm leaving in a few minutes from work to go. The hospital is about an hour away and my DH is going with me. It's great to have this support.

I'll post tonight to let everyone know how it went. I'm armed with determination, my letter of medical necessity, my DH, support from my DH and the goal to feel a whole lot better.

I haven't discounted my career change as a Victoria's Secret model yet. ;)