June 4, 2009
Jun 04, 2009
Well, HAPPY SURGIVERSARY TO ME!!!!
Two years ago today I decided to change my life. And change my life I did.
I have mixed emotions about this surgiversary. I thought for sure that I would be at goal right now. Or at least in Onderland. But for the past 6 months my weight has bounced around between 202 and 210 - it is like my bode likes being this weight. In my surgeon's eyes - and in the eyes of the WLS communityin general, I am a sussess because I have lost and kept off 75% of my excess weight - but it isn't good enough for me.
I am going through a really hard time right now at home. And it makes me sad a lot, and angry a lot and frustrated even more. But I will get through it. And althought I am really stressed out, I am NOT gaining wieght! That is AWESOME! I have a new goal - Onderland by my birthday! I know I can do that!
And look at eveything that I can do now.
A few days ago I gave myself a pedicure. Because now I can bend down and REACH MY TOES!
And yesterday I got a massage. And as I was lying on the table I was able to relax instead of freaking out that the masseuse was grossed out by my hugeness. In fact, it was rare that I got a massage when I was so fat.
I can drive in the car with my seatbelt fastened and my stomach doesn't even come close to touchin the steering wheel.
I go down the big water slide at my nephews birthday - because I can!
I run around with my nephews and play on the floor and lift them over my head - because I can!
I sit down in the small seats in the theatre with room to spar.
I cross my legs.
I wear high heels!
I am more self confident and more self reliant than I have been in my whole life. I love my life. I love my family - without whom none of this would be possible - and I love my friends. I am looking to the future with great hope and great anticipation!
Me - BEFORE - 356 pounds.
And Me NOW!!!! I will NEVER be that fat girl again!!!!