Maureen C.

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One year ago today I had RNY Gastric Bypass surgery.  I can't even begin to explain how I felt in the days leading up to my surgery and the first month after having my surgery.  I was scared, excited, scared, terrified, afraid, scared, sad, nervous, disappointed, hopeless, and hopeful...oh and scared.  These words just can't express it.  

I made the decision for obvious reasons.  I was tired of living my life the way I was.  I was tired of feeling like I was "less" of a person because I was obese.  I was tired of hating myself.  I was tired of trying so hard to be perfect and over compensating for the fact that I was fat so people would like me.  I was OVER being depressed and being unhealthy.  I was tired of not truly living.  I wanted a future.  I wanted to be healthy.  I wanted to have a family.  I wanted to be a good wife to my husband.  I wanted to LIVE.  

The night before my surgery my husband and I went out to dinner (my doctor did not require a pre-op diet other than no food after midnight and don't eat the world on the days leading up).  I was trying to focus on protein because my blood sugar was very high and wouldn't come down with my meds.  I ordered an American cheese omelet which came with potatoes.  I asked the waitress to take my plate so I wouldn't eat everything and she said, "oh honey, I totally understand" as she took my plate.  I thought to myself, yeah right, you skinny b---h."  Then she came back to me and began to tell me how she had gastric bypass surgery and I about fell out of the booth.  I had been praying for a sign that everything was going to be OK and this MUST have been it.... I really needed that.  So on January 13, 2009, I hugged my mom, I hugged my step-dad, and I hugged my Alberta... thinking it could possibly be the last time I saw them.  I walked my 320 pound ass into the operating room and climbed up on the operating table all by myself.  I let them strap my arms down and I let them administer sweet, sweet anesthesia.  When I woke up I felt like I had been hit by a truck and I was so thankful that the "easy" part was over and for my magical pain button.  I spent 2 nights in the hospital and my  husband stayed with me the whole time.  My mom and step-father visited, my in-laws visited and my father visited.  When I came home, there were all kinds of flowers from family and friends and I basically lived in our basement for a week or so (which smelled like a funeral home...lol.)  

I had to RE-learn how to eat, I had to sip 2oz. of water every 15 minutes or so.  I had sugar free popsicles, chicken broth and sugar free jello for a week-- it was ALL I could stomach (imagine that).  I watched the food network like a dummy and went through this "WTF did I do?" stage.  A week after my surgery I had my first follow up visit with Dr. Roe and I freakin' lost 18 pounds!  It was then that I realized I had done the right thing for me.  

I took 9 weeks off of work to recover from my "open RNY."  Each week I graduated to new diets and I took every day as it came.  I developed new habits and really took the time to figure out how I would work these new habits into my "regular-back-to-work routine."  

Now I am celebrating my 1 year "surgiversary."  I have learned and am still learning who I am.  I have learned who my best and truest friends are.  I have made new friends.  I am not afraid to live.... I AM LIVING.  I am no longer diabetic, my cholesterol levels are normal, all my blood work is great and I have lost 142 pounds.  I am looking forward to a long and healthy life and I am so thankful for the "second chance" I have been given.  I have been truly blessed with a "complication free" RNY.  Now it's all about maintenance and getting rid of those last 20 pounds.  There have been so many "wow" moments over the last year and once again, words just cannot express the joy that I feel.   

Here's to a long and healthy life...GO ME!

Tonight I'm gonna party like I weigh 199!!!  I have not weighed under 200lbs in at least 12 years.  I feel soo good!  I went to Chicago for four days to visit my best friend.   I was a little nervous because I haven't travelled since I had my surgery in January.  I had NO problems, I was able to keep up the good habits and I had a BLAST.  The day I left I was 200 pounds... and this morning I was 199.  Side note... I had the world's smallest sundae at Ed Debevic's and BOY was it good!

I can't believe it's been a whole 6 months already!  I've lost 108 pounds and I've only got about 52 more to go.  This time last year is when I made the decision to really go through with the surgery.  I remember I was just sitting on my couch, fat as ever and so depressed I couldn't stop crying.  It was right then that I decided.  I wanted so badly to just LIVE my life and that's what I'm doing.

Today I hit 100 pounds lost!  I am so happy; I just can't believe it!

So it's been over 4 months since my surgery and today I am HALF WAY to my goal!!!  So many things have changed in the last 4 months and I couldn't be happier!!!  I've lost 85 pounds, I'm no longer diabetic, and I can cross my legs!!!  The littlest things feel like BIG WINS every single day.  I am so grateful for this new tool that I've got.... even my husband has lost 50 pounds just because he's being supportive of me.  Compared to last year, I feel like a whole new person who's excited about life and everything that's ahead... and I've gained a whole new support system on this site.  I am just so grateful...that is all.