My Journey Into The Unknown...

Dec 27, 2006

My weight:
Sept.2009~  438 lbs - very painfully exercising and trying to follow doc's 'diet'
June 2009~  442 lbs
Feb. 2009~  450 lbs - Back up to highest weight ever
Dec. 2008~  432 lbs - Nutri System only works if you can afford to buy it! 
Jun. 2008~  432 lbs - Nutri System seems to be working!
Jan. 2008~  450 lbs - med change, sudden weight gain
Nov. 2007~  436 lbs
Aug. 2007~  438 lbs
July 2007~  450 lbs - a new high, not good. 
May 2007~  440 lbs
Dec. 2006~  404 lbs
Aug. 2006~  406 lbs - stopped phentermine
June 2006~  412 lbs - dosage increased
May 2006~  418 lbs - started phentermine 
Jan. 2006~  423 lbs - begin trying to lose weight

September 2009~
Well, after a four plus month plateau, I finally lost a little more.  I saw an article about a woman who walked off 410 pounds.  I thought "Hey, why can't I do that?!?"  Then I remembered - oh, yeah, I can barely walk!  I'm doing underwater exercise, but it's not enough.  I'm also riding my recumbent stationary bike and wow, does that hurt!  Maybe I'm due for knee injections again (Hyaluronin).

June 2009~
I lost a little again, but only having gained it back first.  I went to my primary and asked her to put me on the 6 mos. diet & exercise program that I'm sure Medicare will require (if not more).  Considering my disability, I'm not able to do much exercise.  I don't know if I want lap band or RNY.  I'm leaning more toward lap band, and told the doc that, and she tried to send me to someone for RNY.  I get the feeling she's too busy to listen to me.

December 2008~
Where did 2008 go?  I haven't lost any more weight.  I've just been struggling to keep the 18 pounds off!  I found some Nutri System food pretty cheap (relatively), and I'm eating that again, so maybe it will help - I hope, I hope!  The more I talk to people who have had WLS, the less I want to have it.  But if I hit 40, and I'm still this fat, I'll have to rethink that.  I don't want to be thin, I just want to be normal again!

June 2008~
I was given a bunch of Nutri System food, and it's been working.  I've even cheated some, and taken some days off, and I still have slow weight loss.  Unfortunately, now I'm out of all the food, and I can't afford to buy any more - WOW, this stuff is expensive! 

November 2007~
Well, I haven't lost much, but thank God I haven't gained either.  Life is still rough, but I'm blessed.  I wish people could see who I am under all my fat!  I'm so thankful that my husband does.  He truly is a Godsend!  My son is in treatment and doing better.  It's going to be a struggle for him all his life, but he's learning how to deal with things.  Our daughters are also doing better adjusting to things.  We have a great church family now that really cares about our kids and us.   

August 2007~
Life is just all about complications, isn't it?!?  Now I need a hysterectomy.  I've never had 'female' troubles, but I have a fairly large fibroid that's causing intense bleeding (and wow, is that humiliating in public!).  Actually, I'm glad they're going to just take out my uterus instead of trying to shrink the fibroid.  My youngest kid is 13, and I had tubal ligation after she was born, so I told the doctor to "take it out!  I'm not using it anymore!"  Despite this setback, I'm doing better emotionally - without the meds.  I only took them about a month and realized I just don't want to numb myself anymore.  I'd rather feel pain with the joy than feel nothing! 

May 2007~
Well, so far this year hasn't been going well (extreme understatement).  Since my last post my foster Dad died, my son is living in juvenile detention and will be going into residential treatment or incarcerated - we're not sure which yet.  Also, my biological mother, with her usual grace, attacked while I'm down.  I've gained weight and I'm depressed.  I'm seeing a counselor and just started some medication for the depression, so things should be looking up soon.    

December 2006~
I've had a lot of setbacks, but I'm trying to be positive.  I've lost 19 pounds this year.  It's not a lot, but considering my disabilities it's an accomplishment!  I'm still considering WLS, but my husband and I have decided I should keep trying on my own awhile longer.  It's been a rough year.  My foster Mom went home to be with Jesus after losing her battle with cancer.  I can't wait to see her again someday, but for now I miss her A LOT.  Also, my husband had to have the lowest left lobe of his lung removed this year and was out of work for 3 months.  We're hoping if the next year isn't as rough, I may be able to focus more on weight loss and less on problems!  Maybe....    

August 2006~
I'm still losing weight, but very slowly. Depression is a huge issue - no pun intended. I had hoped to do this without surgery, but now I just don't know if it's possible. Due to disability, I've been unable to exercise, and no diet will do the job alone (no healthy one anyway). On the bright side, I was finally approved for my disability and they paid me back to the original disability date of November 2004. I was able to use the money to help our family dig out of some of the huge debt that my lack of income for almost 2 years has created. My husband never complained, but I feel better about being able to contribute.

June 2006~
I'm seeing a new doctor for weight loss. She's not a bariatric surgeon, but she does specialize in bariatrics and prescription assisted weight loss with a diet and exercise program. Since I've been seeing her, I've lost a little. Now all I keep thinking is "Dear God, please let this continue!" 

May 2006~
Since beginning the workout program at the YMCA I've had a lot of setbacks. Every time I start doing better, my body rebels in some other way. While swimming, my hip replacement apparently moved in a direction it shouldn't have and I couldn't walk for 2 weeks! I also finally had my right shoulder checked out because the more I worked out, the more it hurt. I had fallen on that arm last year when my knee gave out. The MRI showed a tear in the rotator cuff as well as a small bone that's in the wrong place and tearing things up in the upper area. And the list goes on...

January 2006~
So here I am beginning my journey again. I am now the heaviest I have ever been in my life. I had lost 106 pounds with a sensible diet, drinking a lot of water, and a tremendous amount of walking! But then my hip was giving out on me. I had an accident as a child that resulted in pins being put in to hold my bones together. The hip deteriorated around the pins which should have never been left in all those years. I was contemplating WLS back in 2003, but decided to have the hip replaced (it was going to give out soon anyway!) so I could continue to walk and try to lose more weight on my own. After having the hip replaced my knees kept having trouble, especially the left one. I then found out I need both knees replaced. I've had menisectomy w/debridement on the left one to buy some time. So now I weigh too much for knee replacements, I even weigh too much for the hip replacement I already have. I had my consult w/the bariatric surgeon and began paperwork to get my insurance to approve RNY Gastric Bypass. They require medical records showing that I have been more than 100 lbs overweight for at least five years (no problem there), and proof of a six month physician supervised diet and exercise program within the two years prior to surgery approval(there's the problem). So my doc referred me to the YMCA for the exercise part because with my weight and joint problems water exercise is ideal. I began a program at the Y called First Steps on 1/25/06. So far they have set up a workout program for me involving recumbent bike, treadmill, upper body weight training, and various other exercises. Also, beginning February, I'm starting a water exercise class. So I'll be working out and doing the water exercise class on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and on Sundays I'll be working out and then playing/exercising in the pool with my husband and three rowdy children (ages 12, 13 & 15). So we'll see what happens...

July 2005~  382 lbs - surgery on left knee 
July 2004~  337 lbs - total right hip replacement
Oct. 2003~  310 lbs. - hip surgery (removed pins)
June 2003~ 307 lbs.
July 1996~  413 lbs.
11th grade~  170 lbs.
9th grade~  250 lbs.


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About Me
Paulden, AZ
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Apr 26, 2004
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