mickeyirish69

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

 well guys, here we are 4 years later and I am in a pickle so to speak. I hear about tons of people who gain the weight back after a few years but I have the other side of that coin. I had a baby a year ago but let me tell you about right before I got pregnant. The first year weight fell off, the second it still came but at a slower rate and the third it was like spurts. I would stay the same a few months then BAM lose 5 pounds then the same for a few months again. The problem was I went past my doctors goal and then past mine. Okay, I was happy, I was under 130 pounds at 5 foot 9 inches and a size 3/4 was roomy on me and I have a large frame so anything smaller then that might not fit around my bones but I was going to find out soon for I had stopped trying to loose weight 6 months prior and was still loosing anyway. In fact I was eating like a pig just to keep at the weight I was. My Boyfriend of years was starting to get worried for he said every bone in my body stuck out and my hip bones were even hurting him. I decided to make a doctors apt to I went to my reg doc and found some shocking news
I was going to have a baby.
In my 40s with our youngest child almost 16 it was a real shocker. I also had loads of issues with my other pregnacys and suffered from eclampsia and with my son I had gained 140 pounds. This time I was worried I would not gain enough but the first 6 months was a text book pregnacy and I gained like 20 pounds when the eclampsia hit again and when they induced I was at 210 with a weight gain of 85 pounds. Now a lot of that was water but I pretty much though I was going to end up around 160 pounds after that and a size 8 or 10 and you know what I was fine with that. Well she was born and within a week I lost 30 pounds, with in a month another 30. After that it slowed way down but I was still loosing but I was already 10 pounds lighter then I thought I was going to end up. So much for the surgery only working a few years for here I was over 3 years out and had a baby and still loosing. Well now she is a year and I am 3 pounds away from where I was before here where my boyfriend was so worried and I am still loosing. So here I am almost a size 2 again but the other thing is I never had the tummy tuck since I got pregnant and thought why bother so I have about 5-10 pounds of loose skin on my stomach and not to mention the arms and thighs insurance wont pay for so in real terms I pretty much weigh about 110-115 and would be a 0 if I had the tummy tuck. AND I can't stop loosing. I am eating about 2500 calories a day to keep as stable as I can and I am still loosing at that. To be honest I could not eat any more calories without getting ill and I never found a shake I could keep down. UHG! I wanted to be thin all my life but I see my boyfriends point and too thin is too thin and the fact it does not seem to be stopping even 4 years later is starting to worry me. I am going to post in the forums to see if there is anyone with some advice

Wow, its been a while since I posted. I am now going on 8 months out and have came a long way. I weight 185 now and my doctor gave me a goal of 165 so I am only 20 pounds away. I feel better, I get out more and have starting caring what I look like again as far as hair and make-up and clothes. I just got into a size 11-12 and I am thrilled with it but when I look in the mirrow I still see the same person.
   I know its a problem but I have no confedance in my looks and keep thinking I should weigh less by now. Its funny for I can't focus on the fact I have lost 120 ponds in 8 months all  can see is I am not at my goal of 130 and that goal is way to thin for my doctors taste and though he gave me a goal of 165 he told me please dont go under 150 if you feel you still need to lose.
  The only reason I want to be 130 is so when I quit smoking i won't freak with some weight loss. But another part of me just wants to be on the really thin side of normal and would love to see a size 6 or 4 even. Eating is another issue for I try to eat good and always feel like when I doI over eat even though I only hit around 1100 calories on a really big food day so then I go a day without to try to make up for it. BAD HABIT I know and I gotta bust this. I keep telling myself if I can just see I look normal I will quit that.
   I also worry for I know the surgery has gotta be wearing off soon and th rest of the weight will be up to me and though I dont set me time goals to hard I feel myself rushing them when I get a little closer. For expample my first goal was to be 200 pounds by my 38th birthday and when I hit it two months early I decided to be 180 by then and now my birthday is two weeks away and I am cutting my calories super low and working out like a feind to get there when I should just be happy I hit the 200 mark like I said.
  My next goal is to be at my doctors goal by the end of summer and I know if I hit 180 and I am going to be stressing with that. before I hit my 200 goal the end of summer goal was 180 so I am really pushing myself hard. I also wonder what I am going to do if I hit my personal goal,Where will my focus be then?
  Time will tell!

its been a while since I posted so I thought I should add some stuff here.
 I am about 4 months out and my weight is now 222 so i am down 80 pounds. I am sure that is pretty good for 4 months but I feel like I have been stuck at this weight for a while now and the scale just will not move. It is so stressing me out. 
   I know I am not exercising as much as I should but I am making an effort. It is just not every day. I think I get some good exercise in about 4 days a week. I am so waiting for warmer weather so I can get out more and move around.
   My other issue is I feel like I am eating too much. I feel like I eat all day and I am always hungry. I can not eat much ( Well some foods, others I can eat more of) and my calories are still under 1000 a day but its the always hungry thing that is getting to me. A few days I have made myself go to bed for I was hungry and  knew if I stayed up longer I would eat something. It is driving me crazy that I may be over eating and that might be the reason I am not lossing right now. I just feel like I am grazing since when I eat I get full so fast it doesnt make me not be hungry.I really hope I am not stuck here for I want to be so much more closer to my goal.
  Speaking of goal I should talk about that. My doctor never told me a goal so I sorta came up with one myself. Before I gained a bunch of weight I was around 200 and though chubby I was fine with that and if I could maintain that I would be okay with it though not happy. The goal I made for myself is 140 though 135 would be awesome. !40 makes me nervous as it is for if that is the case I am only half way there and since I am 4 months out my loosing is really starting to slow ( lol, with this stall ((I hope it is a stall anyway)) it is not slow but stopped) 
   I still feel really fat though in the last few weeks I have caught glimpses of myself and can now see the loss though I am still wearing my old clothes for they were stretchy and still fit. I have also started measuring myself and can not believe how big my waist is. 45 friggen inches. It is also where I carry all my weight.
  My gut is also really mushy now and before the surgery my gut was more like being pregnate and hard. Compacted fat maybe?
 I can also see where skin is going to really sag. Arms, thighs and stomoach. Not fun.
  Anywho I will post later and let you know if I got over this ruff patch!

Well, today is the day i start on puree foods and I feel like I have been waiting forever and ever. I got my son up for school today and just had some yougert for it was early and I am not an AM perseon. I was also up all last night for cramps are killen me and I could not get comfortable.
   The yougert is a good ol standby and I have always loved it but for the last week it has been worring me for I can eat a whole container and not feel stuffed or anything. I thought my surgery was bad for it went down so easy and though the now sugar, fat free cups are smaller thatn the other ones its still gotta be close to 1/2 a cup in food and it was a snap to eat it. I know on the diet plan the sample meals were like 1/4 cup this and 1/4 cup of that and 1/4 cup of this so the fod the shown was over 1/2 cup and I had nothing but the yougert but I still felt like I was cheating somehow and if I could eat that so well I was in real trouble when I could eat other foods.
    SO nervously I went to make my soft scrambled eggs secretely afraid I would scarf them all down in 2 secnds flat. I have never made eggs for one, let a lone a dieting person before so I wans't sure how many to make so I started with two eggs and cooked them and ran to eat them. they smelled so good and I was so ready.
   3 bites later I couldnt eat another. I was stuffed and since I ate on the fast side I was feeling more stuffed with every second so I decided to take a break and see if maybe I just ate to fast and in a few minutes I could have another bite or 3. Nope, 30 minutes later and I am still stuffed so I hope that means the surgery did work well abd I can not eat a lot for if just 3 small spoons of somewhat solid food fills me like that its got to be good!!

all I can think about is real food tomorrow or at least pureed real food. I had broth and couldnt drink it and jello is getting old so I am ready. I plan to inch my way into and not go nuts. Tomorrow I think I will try eggs and then the next day I saw on here where someone blended tuna and added a little mayo and was good and that DOES sound good. I will miss the bread but I can live.
    Now that the pain part is almost over the worst part for me so far is smelling all that good good other people are cooking. Until the first of the year my son and Hubby are doing all the cooking for them for my energy levels come and go and for the most part its fattening food. Well sort of, lots of homemade burgers, subs and then they order pizza a lot too. Pizza is my all time favorite food so thats tuff for me.
   My son is also on the heavy side though not huge and after the first of the year he will be eating more of the foods I eat. I talked to him about it before and he likes the idea. His dad on the other hand does not know what healty is and wouldnt touch it with a ten foot pole but he also has that GOd it makes me sick metabolism and can eat that way.
    The only other thing that is buggen me right now is mr monthly. I havent had in a year do to the weight gain and it is really bad this time. In fact it is so bad if it keeps up at this rate tomorrow I am calling the doc about it.Cramps are killen me and I think my surgery pain would be gone if the cramps didnt keep bringing it back. UGG

Well  a few things have happned. One, I found my scale and though I read the average weight loss for my size is 10-30 pounds I was so hopping for 30 but thought with my luck it would be under ten. Turns out I have lost 20 so far. I was bummed but then again its that time of the month ( first one in a year due to weight gain) and I am also having issues with number 2 ya know. I told myself it will be more later when these issues are over. Wishfull thinking!

  The other thing is for two days now I have been walking some. Not too far just about 1/2 mile or so but since just last week I was in big pain going down the stiars its a start. I liked to work up to a couple of miles a day.

what a bad time of year to do this !!! OUCH OUCH all that yummy stuff and me only 11 days out.
I did eat some for my 13 year old son made it all since I was not up to it yet and I tried to be good but since I can go on puree in a few days I know I hceated a bit.
what I had was a bite or two of these things
cranberry sauce ( the jellyed kind-figured if I could eat jello this wasnt so bad.
mashed potatos, dry but they were good.
yam, plain
and the mushroom sauce from green bean cassarole

though I didnt eat much and nothing else all day it did kind of freak me out that I could eat it without any effects and I worried that maybe the surgery didnt work right for me.

For the restof the day I obsessed over the fact I was just eating too muc all together and wasting the surgery. A typical day was a yogert, a pudding, a popcicle, some apple sauce and maybe another helping of one of the items on this list. It said to eat 8 times a day but if I did I could eat a whole yogert 8 times without feeling ill  though pudding filled me at half a cup. I still hadn't found my scale so I had been trippen bad that I was not going to loose weight because I ate too much.

The start of the second week I got to add some soup and pudding to my menu and man was I happy for I really wasn't a broth person and the week before was mostly water. I was also feeling better and walking around the house good. This led to a fasle sense of I can do anything and I had my DH drop me off at the store for some grocery shopping and 5 minutes there I knew I had made a big ol BOO BOO. I was in some nasty pain and fumbled through the rest of the shortend trip trying not to cry. This had me in bed the rest of the day and sore the next

I have read other peoples stories how it was a snap for thme but my first week was hell. Once home I took my binder off for a shower and could not get it back on for it hurt too much and to make matters worse the pain ball they sent home for swelling and pain control didnt work right so I was really uncomfortable and the pain was pretty bad. After I was home 4 days or so it started to get better fast and things were looking up. I had no idea where my scale was so I had no idea what I lost that week.