July 2009

Jul 24, 2009

 7/24/09

Ok...Lets see what has been going on...  I haven't posted in over a month.  That is unusual for me.  I guess when we get to a maintaining status, there isn't much to say.  My husband had a total hip replacement on June 29th.  He is doing great!!  Its amazing that he is back to work, walking without support and taking physical therapy 2 times a week.  He is already looking towards reffing again.  I'm happy for him.  He has been so miserable for such a long time.
My work life is really busy and stressing me out.  I have been having trouble sleeping and eating and I know it is due to stress.  I have thrown up more this past month than I have in about a year.  Hopefully, it will settle down and I will feel better about things.  It has played a number on my weight too.  I had been hovering around 118-120 these past few months.  That was not pleasant for me because I had been 116 for almost a year.  I know...big freaking deal...its just a few pounds.  Well, those few pounds drove me nuts.  I was starting to feel better (mentally) about being 118 because lets face it...its pretty damn good!  Then all of this stress began to smother me and ...  I am now hitting 115.2.  These are numbers that I don't think I have ever hit.  I think that I hit in the 115s one time for like a day but never stayed there.  This is wild!!  So, what have I been doing? Since the stress causes my band to be very tight, I have been forced to eat slow, chew chew chew, eat smaller portions and I have been focusing on protein.  WAIT...that is what I was supposed to do anyway!!  DUH!!  Its good to know that 2 1/2 years after having this surgery, my tool still works perfectly.  I am a little bit surprised that it does.  I did not have a fill in 2008 at all and I had a tiny one in Feb this year.  So, it really does work when you hit that "sweet spot".  This is definately a surgery of patience and if you stay patient....it will come!

So, what are my goals now?  Plastics!!  I can't afford it but that is what I want next.  I bet I have 5 pounds of skin to remove.  Its just awful to still feel flabby and fat when I KNOW that I am not fat anymore.  The skin hinders my brain from moving forward.  Now I guess it is a vanity thing.  I deserve to look as good as I feel about this weight loss.  I have worked SO DAMN HARD!!  Who can afford this though?  Seriously, I just don't know how I am going to do it.  I guess the first step is making the appointment and seeing what payment options are available.  Don't know unless I try...right?  If it could be done, I would like to do it either at the end of this year or in January of next year.  We'll see I guess.  

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