mobbwbeauty

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Yesterday I weighed myself and picked up 3lbs... not really happy about it, but now I am trying to get my butt to the gym to get it off of me and work twice as hard. Tomorrow morning I am going to get up in the morning and see if I can get a workout in the morning before I have to be at school and IF I don't have clients tomorrow night then I will go back before bedtime. I really think that I am going to have to up the number of days that I go to the gym and really commit to mornings especially since my evenings are even busier than my mornings.....

I hope I can get back on track I have to admit to having cheated a bit by drinking too much soda, and snack size snicker bars at school. I did at least stick to eating lunch that I took to work and school with me instead of spending money out and I hope to keep that up this week and add in many more workouts than I have had this week. I am supposed to be down to 289 lbs this week and I know I am so far away from that by doing the lazy crap....

Nycky

So far I am so happy that I am hitting my target weights of min. 2lbs per week. I am up and on my way to the gym so that I can make some me time by working out before I have to go to work today. I am still trying to get a handle on making menus so that I can eat everyday like I am supposed to but I am at least maintaining going down instead of up. This morning I am going to have a bowl of multi-grain cereal and then figure out what I can eat for later to keep it healthy. I think I am going to go get a salad to eat for lunch that way I keep it lite. Then after work I have to take the family to the laundromat. I actually intend to take them while I am at work then they can be finished by the time that I get through with my client for the day.

Last night I had to let my boyfriend know that we are not making it. I am truly on my last go around with this topic. Its time to put up or shut up and that goes for both of us. I am so sick of him being lazy and unmotivated, then he wonders why I have nothing to talk about except for house work. How about if he actually did any without prompting or without me having to go into bitch fit mode then we might have something more to talk about. As it stands, everytime I walk into my home and see that nothing is done or everything is half done, it kills a little more of the fight to see if we can make things work. I know it sounds stupid to still be trying, but after having put 3 years into it, and him having a child here that has already been raised by 3 different women I find myself trying to give it a chance. I don't feel that this child deserves to constantly be uprooted because his dad is so fucking useless. I hate to say that about anyone, but sometime it just is what it is. Anyway I am giving this this one last shot and then he is going to have to figure out where he is going because I will not continue to stay with someone who is absolutely NOOOOOO help to me in anything that I need.


Ok well until later this is all that is going on in my life:

Nycky

Today is Friday and I have to work at the salon today. I love to go to work, but I hate having slow days or weeks...
Today I have to do my god-daughters hair for a party she wants to go to, but I really don't like to do free hair... I also have to go to court today for traffic tickets that my daughter got on my other car because I have a warrant due to her not taking care of them sooner. I need soooo much help. I wish I had the money to see what they could do about this band... I don't know if it really works or not because I haven't utilized it in years. I need to get to the gym more, but I have such a busy ass schedule that it just doesn't seem to be enough hours in a day to get it done. I know that I will have to start making the time even if it means that I will have to start leaving people at work until I have had my workout for  the day.

I really need to find some weight loss articles that can help me plan better menus so that I can set up what I intend to eat weekly. I have so much on my schedule that to come in having to prepare dinner is killing me and makes it so easy to go into the unhealthy eating mode.

If anyone has any time saving ideas or menu ideas I would really love to hear them... I really need some real help.

This week my small goal is:

To drink water with every meal
To limit my excess sugar or salt intake
To eat breakfast every morning within 30 min of getting up.
To not buy lunch out, Take something or go home for lunch but no fast food restaurants,
To lose min. of 2 lbs by Sunday 1/17/10 bringing weight down to 292 lbs.
To drop 10 lbs by Feb 13, 2010. bringing me down to 284lbs.
Then reward myself for the little victories in a non food way....
    Maybe I'll treat myself to a movie on my next off day or I will put up $25 for every 10 lbs I lose towards new clothes when I hit my 50lb. goal.

 I have finally gone to work out at the gym this year..... I feel wonderful.... My family went together. My son, boyfriend and god-daughter all went together after having a fairly healthy dinner of salad, grilled pork chops and spaghetti.  We sat around the dinner table discussing health issues and ways to get healthier as a family, then we all decided to get it over together, and go on to the gym.

My god-daughter Jasmin and I went to work on the treadmill 1st. We walked for 32 min at 3mph and i feel pretty good and stayed consistent. Jasmin went up and down on the speed but untimately we both did the exact amount of time and calories burned. I walked 1.47 miles, and  burned 168 calories.  Then we went on to work out our upper body on the machines for abs and arms, and did several crunches.  I was resisting going at first because I was exhausted but I felt wonderful after we went and realized that I just really needed to get started.

I started my day off getting my oil changed at Walmart after dropping my boyfriend off at work, then I went to the salon and had a friend to do. Later I went home took a nap and went on to cook dinner for the family. It was a long day and as it is supposed to have been my off day I really wasn't feeling the idea of having to go to the gym, But it happened to be the best thing that happened all day.

Hoping that in the morning I won't be too sore to go again after being at school all morning teaching and then having to go to the salon for 3 customers after school. 

Also the last good thing that happened today was after weighing myself I had dropped to 294 lbs, from 300. my goal is 2 lbs per week min. and I have been eating a lot healthier than I ever have.  I have not deprived myself of the things that I like to eat . I just have not eaten as much of it as I once would have. I have also been getting in breakfast, and eating several smaller meals during the day.  That is the hardest thing for me because I tend not to get hungry and force feeding myself is really hard to do. I realize though that to get off of this weight I have to eat enough to keep my metabolism up, and make healthier choices when eating on the fly.

Well thats all for now as I have to be at school early and I am almost sure I will have to get up to take my boyfriend to work even though I don't need to get up for school usually so early.... He really is going to have to start driving so he can get comfortable behind the wheel. I am tired of having to always drive everyone everywhere....

Anyway good luck and keep me in your prayers that I can stick to this healthier lifestyle (not diet). 2010 is my year to get and stay fit....This is it.....

Nycky

Today was extremely snowy out. School was cancelled due to the weather, and I was extatic. I slept for most of the day then I made an attempt to go to the health club, but never actually made it there. I have really got to get it together for making it to the gym. If I start making excuses this early on then I know what the rest of my year is in store for.

One of this years goal for me was to make more ME TIME. That just does not seem to happen no matter what it is I do. I have to work, I have school full time and I am the designated driver(taxicab) in my household. No one has a drivers licence in my home but me and only one person in my home is not old enough to drive. Everyone else does not have a licence only one has a permit, and the others need one desperately. When I get out of school, on most evenings I have to pick up everyone from one place or the other, as the buses stop running around here by 6 pm. There really is no other way for them to get home other than a ride. We have a second car but no one takes the initiative to get comfortable driving so they can't get a licence and that leaves me as the taxicab for the family.

Tomorrow I have to work at the salon, and due to the weather I am afraid that I won't have many clients at all. My income right now is abismal, and if I can't get more people coming in soon, I am going to have to find another job on top of keeping this one, just to make ends meet. My boyfriend does not make very much money and truthfully right now the little bit he is making is just keeping up barely afloat.  As I am the only one who handles the money here it is always me trying to figure out what now. This always leads me into emotional eating. I find myself getting the muchies for sweets or just sitting around getting lazy and unmotivated to do anything about this weight.....

I really know that I can do better than this and this blog is what is helping me to keep my sanity so far this year from all the stress that I am under to make everything and everyone work smoothly as possible.

I have been trying my best to keep to eating healthier and smaller portions which is great, but with my budget so strained now I am having a really hard time finding enough money to buy me healthier foods and snacks that can be just for me. If it is in my house the kids will eat it all up and if I don't budget some things that are just for me then I either don't eat of eat a bunch of junk foods instead.
Pray for me.

Tomorrow morning I am going to get up and take my but to the health club in the early morning before going to the salon. I pray I can stay motivated to get the time in and really find that ME time that I so desperately need.

Nycky

Today is 01/04/2010 Monday

I have so much on my plate right now. I am currently still in a relationship. It is going better but still not quite up to where it should have been in the 1st place. I am however hopeful that somethings will get on track soon. I have recently had my god-daughter to move in with me and am helping her with getting to and from work, on top of all the other things I already had to be doing. I know she can't help the hours they give her so I am not mad at her about it, but it is just another person depending on me for transportation in my house. No one in my house drives other than me, and there are currently 4 driving aged people living here including me. Only one person is under the age of 16, so it makes for a really hectic schedule everyday for me.

Tomorrow is my first day back to school and for the kids but I am hardly excited about it. I get extremely stressed at school because I don't feel I am being utilized in a productive way. I am wasting time that I could be at the salon doing what I need to be doing to bring more income into my home.

I AM GOING TO get my work out in today. NO MATTER WHAT, EVEN IF IT HAS TO BE AT MIDNIGHT..... I have a client today this afternoon, and that is after having an appointment with a housing specialist to see if I can find something more affordable. I have been moving into a larger apartment for the last 2 weeks and still am not through getting everything situated, because of how others in my home are not taking any initative to help get it finished. It is only across the hall and you would think we have moved across the city for all the help that is being given at getting it finished.

I am also trying to get my schedule set up for when and what I am eating, I still have a paper to finish in order to start the other chapters in  my classes for my teachers licence. Talk about a busy schedule. I need to do laundry and no one seems to be helping get things together to get them done....

Yesterday I sat up and ate over half of a pint of ice cream and I know enough about me to know that when I start eating junk it is because I am HIGHLY stressed about something or everything. I am glad that I stopped myself from finishing the whole thing, but I still ate waaayyyy too much of it in one setting. In the past I would have finished it off...

Anyway pray for me, as I intend to try to make this my source of journaling what I am doing, how I am feeling and what it is I am trying to get off of my back in order to make healthier decisions about how to go about getting to my goal of 100lbs lost by my 40th birthday, which is December 23,2010. That equates to only 2lbs per week which is doable if I stick to my guns... later I will post all my stats and starting photos so that I  and you can see the progress or the lack there of....

Pray for me and good luck to all of you....
Nycky

I was just looking at some of the before and after photos of others here and I am soooo happy for those that are losing the pounds. I have not been even a little bit lucky, but I realize that it is a new year and a chance for a new start.

My goal is to lose 2 lbs a week from now until my 40th bday December 23, 2010. I want to be healthy and fanasticly energized by losing this weight and all the demons that helped to bring them on...

I am still currently in the same relationship, and while it has definately had its share of ups and downs I am still optimistic that things can and will get better....However, I have made up my mind that if there is not any positive results on what I need from my partner, I am willing to cut my losses, and do whatever I need to do to be happy and to move forward in my life. Right now things are not too bad, a little hectic financially, but otherwise its just life.  My 16 year old son is doing better than he ever has in school and I am more than a little proud of him for it. My god daughter has come to live with me recently and I am glad that she is here. I am trying to be the mother that she has been needing in her life for some time. She is a young adult and I am trying to guide her into making some choices about what she is looking to do with her life and what kind of people she wants to deal with in reality.

Business wise I am also trying to build my clientel here in this city, while also going to school for my teachers licence. I will be done with school in April 2010, but I have so many more goals that I want to do better with this year than in the past.

I remain optimistic and I look forward to any encouragement that others may have for me....

good luck on your weight loss journeys.

Nycky 298/298/160

I think I must be the only person on this site that has not lost any weight with this darn bann. December will be 2 years and I am still around 300 lbs. I lost my insurance when I was laid off last november and so I don't have the funds to go to have fills or unfills, and Nothing is seeming to work. I get sick often because I think I am too tight, but then somedays I could eat a horse, cow, chicken and the pigs in one setting.  I am so sick of being heavy, and I am now doing the weight watcher program in order to try to get back on track. It is the only method that I have ever lost weight with and I really need to get this weight off.

I am back to working as a Stylist here again and I am loving it, but it takes a while to build you clientel to a managable size for a set income. I have been wanting to get out of a relationship that I am in that is no good for me, but with the finances in the place that they are I have to be patient even though I just want to say "GET OUT NOW"!!!!! This is not what I was hoping for in anyway. This is NOT the man of my dreams, and I am getting to the point that I don't even think we will be able to part as friends because I feel like an emotional hostage in this relationship, because there is a child involved, who has horrible parents, mother and father. I really need to get out of this because it is affecting the way I am able to focus on anything, especially the weight loss, and finances.

I am in sore need of true friends that understand the struggle of weight loss issues, and I am really feeling I am in this by myself. I have got to get this on track and any encouragement is welcome.

I am so angry because I have not lost a single pound in the last month and a half to 2 months. I was drinking those protein shakes but I am not doing that anymore because when I started drinking them is when I picked up the weight.

 My daughter had her surgery about 2 weeks ago and already wants to get rid of it. I have been trying to encourage her to not give up so quickly on everything, and even her boyfriend complained to her that she always seems to do that, so I think she is going to try to give it a real try.

My last final is Monday for math and then this semester is finally over. I am not going to school through the summer, I am going to try to work as much as possible to bank some money so that I can go to part time on both jobs in the fall, that way it won't be as hectic as it was this semester trying to work 2 full time jobs and attend College full time.  My fiance now is working at one of my jobs also, so he now has an income to help with some expenses. We are still just trying to keep afloat, with all the adjustments from his moving here. But I think things will be ok by the end of next month (hopefully).

We are still having clean up issues, but, it is getting a little bit better. We still have a long way to go with things being like they should. I am just trying to get my fiance to step up and handle business like he should, I get the impression he has never had someone that is on top of things like I am so, it bugs me when I don't see him jumping to it, and I don't want to be the only person resolving issues. This needs to be a team effort.

I miss my mom, I really don't get to see her as often as I used to, and now because my life is so busy I really don't get to talk to her as often either. I have got to do better to rectify that with her and my sisters, I love them all very much.

That is it for now.