Joanne C.

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12/21/08

My weigh in went about as good as I thought it would.  I lost 5 lbs!  And I finally got to move my ticker a little to the right.

This is a new low weight for me.

And the restriction continues, which is really great.  After having this fill and getting this restriction, all those other fills I had and thought I had good restriction...nope.  NOW I have good restriction.  I'm not complaining though, I still lost the weight so it is all good.

We are slowly getting back into the working habit too.  I walked at lunch 2 times last week and we went to the gym on Friday.  Hopefully we will go 2 more times before heading out of town for Christmas. 

12/14/08

I can't believe the last time I updated in here was in October!

Well, since my last post, I've been doing bad and then doing good.

Right after I got my 10%, I gained like 8+ lbs in 2 weeks. Halloween and PMS are a deadly combination.

I was back up to 224 I think it was. And not exercising.

I'm slowly going back down. It's not fair that what I put on in 2 weeks takes me about 6 weeks to lose.

Luckily Thanksgiving was NOT a eating fest. I lost 2.2 that week.

I got a fill a couple of days ago. I am now at 3.9 in my 4cc band. I have GREAT restriction.

I am going to the gym tonight. So hopefully that will be the start of getting back down to business.

I am afraid I have pretty much blown my chance of being under 200 by the end of the year.

I don't know, maybe. I do have really good restriction. I did liquids for 2 1/2 days just because I wasn't hungry. And I plan on hitting the gym hard and walking again at lunch time.

So maybe. Just maybe.

10/12/08

I got my 10% Award at WW yesterday. I have lost over 24 lbs since I started.

I am down to 217.something. I don't remember exactly and my WW stuff is still in the car and I just don't want to get up right now to get it.

I will change my ticker when I do.

I still feel kind of guilty at WW because no one there, except Hubby and my mom, know I have the band. They are soooo anti-wls that I didn't tell anyone.

And I still have to watch my food, make good choices and exercise just like everyone else on WW. So I know it shouldn't really make me feel funny. Yet it does.

My mom even made a snide comment about it the other day. She said something about well SOME people still get hungry, not everyone has had their stomach stapled. I just stared at her. She KNOWS how hard I still struggle and it is not just EASY. And please, stapled?-that was back in the 70's.

I just walked away.

Anyway - 10%! Go me!

9/30/08

I have felt the need to increase my activity level. I don't mean that I want to exercise more, because I hate exercising. But I want to do more THINGS, if you know what I mean.

I start yoga on saturday. It is a one hour class. It is twice a week, but I am going to start with once a week and then work up.

I am looking into a martial arts class. I would love to be able to defend myself without my gun.

In light of all this extra activity, and its potential bounciness and being upside down, I have been on a quest for a good sports bra.

And it has not been easy.

I am a 38DDD. I used to be busting out of a 48DDD. DD=E and DDD=F so I probably should have been in a 48G or H. So with about 60lbs left to go, I don't have much hope of losing too much more boob.

Anyway, sports bras just don't come that size. I guess they figure if your THAT big, you don't need to be trying anything that requires a sports bra. I had the same trouble when I started seriously hiking. Women's sports clothes don't come in 2X or 3X. I had to wear mens.

I found something close. A good, supportive, underwired DD. It is called Maia Bra, Moving Comfort. I got mine at Academy for $35 but I just Googled it and Runningwarehouse.com has it for $30.

Since it is a DD and I need a DDD, if I wear just it, I bloop out the sides. But when I put it on over my regular bra - BINGO.

Worth every penny.

9/18/08

Not only were there NO Krispy Kreme's eaten at work today - and there were 3 boxes of them - But also, I am sitting here eating my fish like a good little banded weight watcher and NOT eating the spaghetti with sausage sauce that I made for dinner for the skinny people in the house.

Skinny PERSON - which would be my daughter.

9/16/08

I had a band appointment last week. I had lost 12 lbs from my previous appointment. I didn't ask for a fill. I thought I was doing ok.

And I was. Until I TOM kicked in. It just. IS. NOT. FAIR.

I didn't go to far off the deep end. We went out for Chinese one night. And I ate 2 plates. I hate it when I do that. I know I don't have restriction at my TOM, I should know better than to eat out. I know I can eat more than I should, so I do.

And the worst part....the food wasn't good. I still want Chinese. But now I want GOOD Chinese.

And I always retain water like the Hoover Dam.

I am still going to the gym. I am still walking on my lunch hour 3 or 4 times a week.

I am TRYING to get back from "the deep end". My TOM is over, but now I have the residual hungry. I am back to eating less again, TRYING TRYING TRYING, but now it is not filling me up and I AM HUNGRY.

I do not like hungry. GO AWAY HUNGRY. Hungry makes me do bad things.

I am going to give it a week and see if it gets better. If not I am scheduling an appointment for a small tweak.

9/7/08
Man I hate exercising.

I'm not even sure why I hate it. It's not the sweating - I don't care if I get sweaty, I can take a shower. It's not the time - it gets me out of the house to do something. It's not the monotony of it - I watch TV at the gym while I'm there.

So what? I don't know. It's like a chore, it's something I have to do - like going to work - whether I like it or not.

If I watch what I eat, I lose a little bit here, a little bit there. If I exercise, but don't watch what I eat so much, I maintain.

But when I watch what I eat AND exercise, I lose quite a bit here and a lot there.

I had not exercised in several weeks. About a week and a half ago I started walking 1 mile on my lunch time. Again. And I was eating good.

Yesterday's weigh in - I lost 7.6 lbs.

Man I love exercising!

9/6/08

It has to be some kind of fluke. Or maybe the scales weigh different. I think I got in a different line to weigh in this week.

I lost 7.6 lbs this week.

I am down to 218.8.

I need to lose 1 more pound for my Weight Watchers 10% goal.

My husband did really well this week too. He lost 6.8. I finally got him to switch to the Core plan with me.

I also stopped taking the generic Synthroid last week and went back on the name brand med. It makes a huge difference in my energy level. I have been on a major cleaning tear.

8/30/08

My job is changing insurance companies next year. I am not happy. I really like UHC. They are very wls "friendly". I was quickly approved and have never had any issues with them covering anything. They will also pay for a breast reduction. Certain amounts of tissue have to be removed, but I don't believe that is a problem. I have plenty.

When I weighed 338 lbs I was busting out of a 46DDD, I think. I should have been in a bigger cup though. If you look at my "before", in the orange shirt, you can see my extra boobage.

Currently I weigh about 223 (I did go to WW today and I lost 3.6 after gaining 3.4 last week, but I don't remember my exact weight) and I wear a 38DDD. I have tried the DD. It gives me the "third boob", like my sister used to call that extra that blooped out the top.

So, over 100 lost and down MAYBE 1 cup size.

Now, what I am thinking is this: if I can get down to around 180, by December, can I get my boobs safely done?

By safely, I mean as in, any remaining weight I lose (and I would like to go maybe 20-30 below that) will it come directly from the chest? I don't want to get them done and then lose a little more, and have them look like I need to have them done again.

The other concern is will the plastic surgeon even consider this? I know most of them want you at goal and maintaining. But I just don't have the time for that. I don't know that if my insurance won't pay for part of it, if I will ever have the chance to get them fixed.

I am going to call Tuesday and schedule a consult. Maybe if I explain about the insurance change, I can convince him to do it at the end of the year.

Then I have to do my part. I don't know though, 3 1/2 months, that is about 15 weeks. Even at 2lbs a week, that is only 30lbs and I will be just barely under 200.

I will move into the gym. I will do liquids, if I have to. I want this bad.

Wish me luck.

8/27/08

I'll start with the weight related - I am doing much better, much more in control. My daughter offered my a Reese's Cup the other day and I said no thank you and went about my business. No obsessing or wishing I had said ok, or trying to sneak one later.

I hate how out of control I feel sometimes. At least it seems to be short lived and the times it happens actually seem to be farther and farther apart. I wish I knew what it is all about. Why the self sabotage? Am I afraid to get to goal? I don't think I am. If I had to venture a guess - maybe I am afraid of not being able to STAY at goal. I worry about gaining it back and then people saying things like "what a shame. She had that surgery and everything and lost so much weight, but look at her now." I don't really think that is it either. I am very aware of that worry, and I may be way off base, but I get the feeling the self sabotage is related to something more unconscious. Hmmmm.

Well, I think it is safe to declare me back on that wagon. And hopefully it won't take me long to lose the 3.4 lbs I gained over the last 2 weeks.

Work related:
I am not getting laid off! They had enough volunteers to leave and they are rearranging some job functions. Yippe! I don't lose my insurance and if I can keep my feet on that wagon, breast reduction next year!! Lower body lift after that.

Health related:
My rotator cuff is not torn, I don't need surgery. It is frozen. I got a painful steroid shot in the shoulder and will have physical therapy for several weeks. Hopefully some time soon, I will be able to dress myself again.

Daughter related:
My oldest daughter who did not graduate in 2007 like she should have, and then went back to school in 2008 and AGAIN did not graduate, has gone back to finish her 1.5 credits that she needs to graduate. She will be done around Halloween.