My story is that I am seeking revision surgery for my original open RNY. I had my open RNY done four years ago in Phoenix, Arizona by Dr. Juarez. He did a very good job and I came through the surgery with no complications whatsoever. My insurance company, however, just prior to the actual surgery informed me that they were not going to cover any follow up procedures, so I was left to "wing it" on my own following the surgery.
That was probably not the best possible arrangement for me. I am not one to particpate unless it is required, and since it wasn't, I didn't follow up on the diet or the support. I went back to work and read some message boards, and that was about it. I ultimately lost 75 pounds and that is where it stopped. About two years out I was still going through some horrible reactions after eating too much, which wasn't too much according to some people, but was too much for me. Sadly too, I had no problem with sweets, so I indulged and that was also not a good thing for me. I guess I was sabotaging myself with almost everything I did. I enjoyed the weight loss and the increase in the energy and stamina. Now I am once again in the "funk" of not being able to endure much of anything. I can't keep up with grandchildren, I can't walk for extended periods of time, and I miss all of that. I have put some of the weight back on, but not all of it. I don't think I would still be alive if I had. I am beginning again with some of the health issues I had prior to my RNY and yet I have to maintain my strength to help take care of my husband who has also gained some weight and is experiencing health issues. We are both looking 60 right in the face and feeling a decline in how we feel. That isn't a good thing for either one of us.
I long for the girl who used to be me. I know she is in there....so deeply hidden, however, that she can't see the sun and smell the rain and laugh at herself and be thankful for every minute of every day. I want her back. I want to stop crying, I want to stop being depressed and I want to look forward to every day I have left on this beautful earth. I want to be available to others who need me.
And so, I begin the process again of seeking help with my situation and have found the most wonderful surgeon in the process of doing so. Dr. Schlesinger is going to do my revision in mid August and I am anxious to have it done.
I am currently working on my Ph.D. in counseling psychology and it is taking a lot of my time. I know that when I am down additional pounds, and I begin to feel "human" again, that all of the stressors in my life will seem more manageable.
While I wait, I love on my three special doggies who know what I am going through (oh yes they do....they are smart), enjoy my ranch and the animals we have, spend precious time with my husband, and plan our eventual move back home to Texas, and do lots of school work! I also am having other "wellness" tests done so that I am in the best possible health before the surgery.
I appreciate all of the support from OH and from friends I have here and in other places in the United States. Thank God for my friends, the closest one being my husband. He is such a support.
I will be posting some blogs later since I am just now getting my profile page developed.
Congratulations to all of you!