Feeling Like Poo But Better Than I felt In Years

Aug 02, 2010

Hello gang!  I've been pre-occupied with life and haven't been posting as I should have.  I feel like crap right now, but even now I feel better than I have in years.  I love it and don't regret a single action I have taken since making the decision to have this life altering surgery.  It has probably been the single thing I have done in my life, for my life.  

I had to spend the last couple of days in the hospital.  I had some serious lower stomach pain.  I thought at first it might be either a bladder infection or kidney stone.  All I know for a fact is that I was in some serious pain and was hating life...LOL.

After a series of tests, the ER doctor came in and asked if I was still in pain.  I was and he said that they would admit me because they didn't find anything in the tests they took.  So, after 4 hours in pain in the ER they FINALLY gave me some pain meds and I sent the hubby on his way home because he had to be to work the next morning.

I have never been one that is too keen on pain meds.  Heck, the day after surgery I was off the pain med pump and off of the liquid meds.  I just can't stand the way that junk makes me feel but let me tell you, I was in some serious pain, I was at them about every 3-4 hours for  dose. 

Finally my doctor came in (well she isn't my usual doctor, mine was on vacation) and told me that I have diverticulitis (sp).  So they sent me home on Flagyl & Cipro.  The pain isn't as bad today but I still don't feel up to par.  I have diarrhea something awful so I am making sure to drink, drink, drink.  They say it should clear up pretty quick.  

I am down to 238 on the scale. Only 8 more pounds and I will have hit my first mini goal.  I am thrilled to say the least!  It still doesn't seem real.  I am still at a stage where I am not sure if this is just a dream that I am going to eventually wake up from.  Heck, if this is a dream, let me sleep the rest of my days because I am living better and more fiercely!  Living fiercely, did I say that?  Yes, yes I did.  Diane is living fiercely!! What a liberating statement!

I have am finding out who I am, what I like and I am doing it PROUD & OUT-LOUD!  Kind of like, "I am woman, hear me roar!"  Ha-ha!  I'm also finding my voice.  I am no longer scared that what I say will run off the only people will ever love me. Nope, I think I am discovering what others knew all along.  I am entitled to my opinions and feelings no matter who likes it or not.  If they walk away, well, then what type of friend or family member were they to begin with?  Certainly not one that I want in my life and I am okay with that.

Well my peeps, I have rambled on long enough.  I hope this finds you, the reader, defining your liberation!  Many blessings your way!
Peace~

0 Comments