I'm so mad at myself.....

Oct 31, 2010

Well, not sure why I feel the need to post today but I do. It was so easy to get the weight off with surgery, I maintained my weight for 5.5 yrs and then I started having sleeping issues, not sleeping at all during the night which was making me crazy so my PCP gave me Rx that unknown to me for some time, it makes you hungry during waking hours. I put on 35 lbs in 6 months and I am not having any luck getting it off. I guess that's why I am mad at myself because I know I am not trying hard, until today.

I manage a chocolate shop and have been kidding myself that working in this job is not the reason for my gain. It is not totally, but it is a big reason, along with not doing any exercise at all. I fool myself thinking that because I am on my feet all day that, that is enough. IT IS NOT. I have got to start doing some of the dozen or so exercise video's, jump on the exercise bike that is in the middle of my living room taking up way to much room and not being used much either. But most of all I have got to get back to getting my 60 grams of protein a day, 8 glasses, minimum, of water and doing at least 30 minutes of exercise every day.

So today, November 1st, I have given myself a goal of May 15th (my 34th wedding Anniversary) to be back to at least my goal weight of 150 but ideally I would like to see my lowest weight of 140 by then.  I think it is a great goal,  7 months to loss 38 lbs. I am not going to pick at work, that does add up for sure...I'm a dumper but know my limits and have been playing games for a while now, a little here a little there...and I'm hurting no one but myself..and I have to stop it.  Of late, I have had head games due to family issues but as of today, I am pushing them right out of my life, focusing on myself again and getting my skinnygirl self back.  I will be journalling everything that goes in my mouth and making sure I do something to move and get my heart rate up, grab some weights daily to get my muscle strength back. It's not much but it's a start.

I'm hoping by getting this out, making myself accountable, that I will focus and make this new goal.  I am slowly getting off the Rx that started this and hope that I can make myself and my doctor's proud of me, again....wish me luck...and I'll post as the months go by....

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About Me
Nashua, NH
Location
32.6
BMI
RNY
Surgery
01/19/2004
Surgery Date
Jun 19, 2003
Member Since

Friends 71

Latest Blog 20
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